Rating: NC-17
Summary: Post season 7. Faith has paid her debts at a price higher than other Slayers would pay. She turned her back on that life when she left, but she can't ignore it any longer when Buffy shows up asking for her help in a situation no one else can handle. Once back in Cali, Faith struggles to keep control as she faces her inner demons.
Music: " Did My Time" by KoRn (chap 10) and "Killer in Me" by D'Amato (chap 19)

-KW Jordan

Prologue: My Heart No Longer Beats...

I'm sittin' in the dark in my hotel room. It suits my mood perfectly. I've been hidin' for the past three days and I don't plan on goin' out any time soon.

The curtains are closed 'cause it's still daylight. I find myself missin' the heat of the sun but I can't do anything about it. I smile sadly.

I always knew life was out to fuck me over, but this? This right here's a Slayer's worst nightmare. There ain't a thing worse than this.

I spent the first day taking my anger out on myself. I screamed out my rage, I drank more alcohol than even a Slayer ever could, I busted up the room and I sliced myself up with glass from one of the beer bottles. I sat on the floor for a while and watched the blood run down my arms in rivulets. Then I spent the next two hours in the bathroom pukin' from revulsion at the hunger.

I've gone over the fight so many times, tryin' to find the point where it turned on me. But I've come to the realization that that fight wasn't ever gonna be mine in the end. Dane was stronger, faster, larger, and by far more powerful than me or anything I've ever been up against before.

I can still feel the sensation of that big son of bitch's fangs tearin' into my skin and his arms like steel bands pinning me to him. The coldness that slowly seeped into my limbs is so much a part of me now that I'm beginnin' to forget what the warmth of humanity felt like. I'm just waitin' for the insanity to hit me.

I remember Spike and Angel's stories and mine ain't makin' sense. They woke up with the demon fully in control. My hunger comes and goes and I'm still able to control myself even when it does hit. It is gettin' stronger the longer I go without, though. I just ain't desperate enough to give in yet.

Maybe the Slayer's still in me. It would make sense, I guess. She's as much a demon as the vampire is, right? God help her if she is still in here. I got a feelin' the vampire in me will take deranged pleasure in fuckin' her up if it takes control.

I'm sure the gang knows what's up by now. I wonder how long it'll be 'fore they come after me. I doubt they'll just leave me alone. I'm not even sure I want 'em to leave me alone. I don't want this existence, but I don't wanna die either.

A tear trickles down my cheek. Just when B and I were gettin' to be friends... I'm sure this'll put a stake in it. I laugh scornfully. Yeah, it'll be her stake in me.

A skitter of nervous energy shoots up my spine and I stiffen. The feeling gets even more intense and then there's a knock on the door. I stand and move until I'm behind the door.

I call out tensely, "Yeah?"

A familiar voice answers, "Faith? It's Willow and Kennedy. Can we come in?"

Fuck. Why'd she have to bring Ken? She must be what caused the mini shock therapy session I was just treated to. I consider her question for a second and then shrug.

Maybe if I'm cooperative and shit, they'll just leave me alone. Just like old times, I smirk. I reach out and unlock the door.

"Yeah, c'mon in," I answer.

Ain't a way in Hell I'm steppin' out there in that hallway. This hotel's got more windows than is healthy for me.

The door opens slowly and I'm given my answer. It's obvious by how hesitant they're bein' that they know somethin' is up. I wonder why B didn't come with. I'd think she'd wanna be the one to get the pleasure of stakin' my ass.

Ken comes in first and I watch from behind the door as she glances around. Red comes in after her and I let the door slam shut. I can't help but smirk when they both jump. They spin around to face me and I wave.

"Hey, guys. What's up?"

Ken's eyes flick over me and she moves in front of Red. Her jaw clenches and she says, "You tell me."

Damn. I ain't ever heard that much venom in Ken's voice directed at me. Should've known little sis had it in her though. I think it's a Slayer thing, honestly.

I tilt my head and shrug. "I thought this was my mission."

Ken smirked, "Oh it was. But you aren't exactly her, either, are you?"

I hear Red mumblin' somethin' in another language and I sigh tiredly. "I'm as much Faith now as I was when I kicked your ass at Metal Gear Solid two weeks ago."

"And I'm supposed to just believe you? You're a vampire, Faith."

"So are Angel and Spike, but ain't nobody staked them yet."

"They have souls."

I edge over to my bed and sit down on the edge. "And I'm still a Slayer."

Red's chantin' slows and I glance over to see her lookin' at me with wide eyes. What? I didn't say anything that strange.

"Uh, Ken?" She says hesitantly.

Ken spares her a brief glance, "What's wrong?"

"She isn't lying," She answers slowly.

The confusion in her expression almost makes me laugh. You and me both, Red, I muse.

Ken's face pales and she's lookin' at me in horror. She shakes her head and moans, "Oh, God, Faith, no."

I give her a weak smile and nod. "Yeah, this is all me."

"H—how are you surviving?" She stammers.

My stomach spasms and lets out a grumbling sound. I blush in reflex. Huh, didn't realize a vampire could do that. Well, you learn new things every day.

I choke out, "Truthfully? Not so well."

"What do you mean?" Willow asks.

I let out a puff of air. "I haven't left my room since I stumbled back in here after it happened."

"Can you tell us about it?" Ken asks as she settles on the recliner.

I lower my head and run my hand through my hair. "I tracked Dane down and we fought, but I was losin' before it really began. He was a big son of a bitch, y'know? I couldn't get away from him."

"W—what's it like?"

I give Ken a pained look. "Hell. I think I've figured out why there aren't any written records of Slayers bein' turned."

Red sits down on the arm of Ken's chair. "Why?"

"They probably stake themselves before their watchers can find out," I say flatly.

"Oh," She mumbles.

"Why'd you guys come here?"

"You didn't check in and Giles was worried."

I glance at Ken curiously. "How'd you know somethin' was up with me?"

Her gaze falls to the floor and she says hoarsely, "Something felt wrong the closer we got to this hotel and when we got in here, you just felt wrong."

I nod. "Does B know somethin' is up?"

"No," Red answers.

"Why?"

"Giles figured you were just playing hooky for a few days," She answers sheepishly.

I grin sadly. "Guess G-man knows me better than I thought."

"Yeah," She mumbles with a lost look in her eyes.

My smile fades as I realize what she's thinkin' about. "I don't want B to know yet."

Her head jerks up. "What? Why?"

"I ain't stickin' around."

"Why? You don't have to go."

I slump back against the wall by the bed. I guess it's time for some truths. I've realized a few things since Ken entered the room; none of 'em good.

"I can't stay. I just don't feel right inside. My instincts are yellin' at me to get away and I have to go with that 'til I understand what's goin' on."

Ken nods. I think she really does get it. "What are we supposed to tell everyone?"

"Tell 'em whatever you want. Just give me a couple days before you do."

Chapter One: But Still It Betrays Me

I feel her in the room before I turn the light on. It's so different than when I was just a Slayer. It ain't disturbin', but it ain't exactly pleasant either. I know it's her 'cause none of the others would have the balls to come here.

I flick the switch and the dim light flickers on. My apartment's in the basement of an abandoned house. I hadn't wanted any attention and this place was nasty when I first bought it and the neighborhood even nastier so I'd figured they wouldn't look for me here. I took the time to take out the neighborhood trash; dusted some vamps, cleared out some sick sons of bitches that humanity ain't gonna miss, and here I am.

Unfortunately, vamps and demons start talkin' when their favorite hangouts get cleaned out. Before long, I caught wind of a rumor that two vamps were in the area lookin' for me. One of 'em was blonde and the other was a brunette. I knew who it was the moment I heard.

I tracked 'em down and beat 'em to within inches of their second deaths. I told 'em if they came here again I'd stake 'em, no questions asked. I was out of the business and I wanted to be left alone. I all ready paid my debts with my life and I don't owe any-fuckin'-body a single motherfuckin' thing – not the Powers, not Buffy, nobody.

I don't even have half a clue as to why she's here. I've stayed as far away from anything Slayer related as I can get. I only slay when I have to and I don't socialize. It's just better that way when you're in my position. Demons hate me 'cause I tend to get stab happy, I get twitchy around some humans, and I get paranoid around Slayers.

I toss my blue jean jacket on the leather couch and saunter across the room to the kitchen without a word or a glance in her direction. I know my silence is drivin' her crazy but that's what I live to do, so to speak. I open the fridge door and pull out the metal container I keep inside.

I grab my favorite mug from the rack above the coffee maker and thump it onto the counter. I twist the cap on the metal container to the side and pour the crimson liquid into the mug. I set it in the microwave to heat and return the container to the fridge. I don't even turn to look at her until I've gotten it fixed the way I like it.

My gaze falls on her and I take a sec to study her. She looks good. Her blonde hair's up in a bun and a tight white tank top clings to her breasts. Her faded and strategically ripped jeans look like they were painted on.

Finally, I clear my throat and ask, "What are you doin' here?"

"I think you know."

I grin in response to her answer. She sucks in a sharp breath and my grin widens. She must not have been as prepared to see me like this as she thought. I trail my tongue over the tips of my fangs and shrug.

"Needed to see me that bad, did ya?"

"Cut the crap, Faith."

I shake my head and laugh, "Know it probably pisses ya off, B. But I really ain't got a clue 'bout why you're here. Wanna shed some light on it?"

"No, but I might want to shed some light on you."

I sip from the mug, ignorin' the look of disgust she's givin' me. Come on! She used to kiss Angel and Spike for God's sake. She even let 'em pop her cork. Why's she actin' like it's so fuckin' nasty now?"

"Get over yourself, B. I ain't been in the game for a while now. I have no reason to know anything about what's goin' down with you or the rest of your little misfits."

I see a flicker of doubt in her eyes and she sighs. Her shoulders slump and she leans forward in her seat. She lets her head drop and sighs as she props her elbows on her knees.

"Sorry, it's just been really rough lately."

I've just realized somethin' that's kinda makin' me wanna throw myself out the door into the dawn light. She still gets under my skin. With just the slightest look, the gentlest touch, the softest words, I'm hers for the takin'. I stick my mouth back on my mug and chug from it to keep from sayin' anything I'll regret.

I remember how badly I always wanted to affect her the same way she did me. I used to try to get her to smile 'cause I couldn't stand to see her sad. I'd make her laugh by doin' the stupidest shit I could think of. I did things I never would've just because she wanted me to. Goin' to the mall with the Scooby Gang, drinkin' fruity drinks I couldn't stand, puttin' out cigarettes before I was through with 'em, droppin' hotties 'fore they could even get a taste—all 'cause she wanted me to.

I loved her to the point of my own detriment at one time. I can see now that ain't much changed in the four years since I've seen her. My heart no longer beats, but still it betrays me. The irony nearly chokes me as I bow to my heart.

"What's goin' down that has you breakin' and enterin'?"

Her jaw works as she straightens and shifts in the chair. Her voice is hoarse when she speaks, "Someone is killing Slayers. In the last three weeks nine Slayers have turned up drained and mutilated."

I stiffen. I think I'm startin' to see why she's here a whole lot clearer and I really, really don't like it. I glare at her.

"It ain't me, if that's what ya thinkin'. I ain't left this little backwater town since I got here."

"Faith, don't get defensive."

I laugh humorlessly, "Don't get defensive? You break into my crib, insinuate I'm offin' your girls, and you don't want me to get defensive? Shit, B. You've flipped your fuckin' lid, ain't ya?"

Buffy stands to try to approach me and I take a step back. She stops and lets out an explosive breath.

"Why do things always get so out of hand with us?"

I smirk, "'Cause one or the both of us is always doin' somethin' stupid."

"I didn't come here to fight, Faith."

"That ain't what it's been soundin' like, B."

She returns to her seat and buries her face in her hands. Her voice comes out muffled, "I just thought you'd have heard something. I didn't know you'd completely dropped out of the slaying business, Faith."

I drain my mug and rinse it out at the sink before I finally circle the breakfast bar to go return to the livin' room. I sit across from her on the couch and cross my legs at the ankles.

"So you expect me to believe that ya came all the way out here on the off-chance that I might know somethin'?"

"Yes?" She squeaks and her hands fall back into her lap.

I see the way her eyes are flickin' around and I laugh. "Lyin' ain't gonna get ya very far, B."

She sighs and her shoulders slump. She quietly replies, "I'm not really sure why I came. I just... he told me where you were and I had to."

That sounds closer to the truth, at least. I shake my head. "Which one of 'em spilled the beans? Was it soul-boy or little Willy?"

She coughs in surprise, "What? It ain't that lit—" She cuts herself off as she blinks and shakes her head rapidly. "Forget I said anything."

I lean forward with a smirk, "No, please, go ahead and finish what you were gonna say. I'm sure it was gonna be interestin' as fuck."

Oh, that's too good. It's been too long since I've seen her turn that shade of red. Fuck, it's just been too long since I've seen her, period.

She glares at me, "So not the point. And I refuse to add to your perversion."

"Awww, but, B, you're takin' all the fun out of it."

She rolls her eyes and asks, "Why do you wanna know which one of them told me?"

I shrug, "Just call me Curious George."

She takes a breath and slowly releases it. She nods as if making a decision and says, "It was Spike."

I lift an eyebrow. She gave that answer just a little easier than I would've expected.

"What'd he tell ya?"

She leans back in the chair. "He, uh, he told me about the fight. He actually said you had become a better fighter than you ever were, basically," She smiles briefly at me.

The smile fades and her gaze drops to the floor. "He also told me about what you'd said about how you'd... you'd paid all your debts with your life," Her voice falters.

I nod. "I was bein' honest."

"Yeah," She murmurs and her gaze lifts to mine again.

Oh, fuck. I know why she's here and Goddamn me, Goddamn me... I know what my answer will be. It'll be the same thing it always has been when she needed me.

I couldn't live with myself if I gave any other.

Chapter Two: Vampire, Interrupted

She hasn't asked yet. She just changed the subject and started an impressive babble-thon that would make Red proud and hasn't shut up yet. Her anxiety is obvious from where I'm sittin'. God, it must be pissin' her off somethin' awful to have to come ask me for help.

I don't doubt that her first reaction to learnin' where I was at was to come after me. We're drawn to each other like moths to a flame and neither of us can resist it for long. But I knew when she told me that she'd just had to come that it wasn't her only reason for bein' here. She can't lie for shit to me and she never really could unless I was too involved in whatever was happenin' to pay attention to her signals.

I'm content for now to just sit here quietly, but eventually we will have to get to the point of her visit. I have to sleep sometime and unfortunately, daytime's when I'm usually tired. It's a problem we vampires tend to have along with a severe allergy to sunlight.

She's insistent about catchin' me up on everything that's gone down with the Scooby Gang. Well, almost everything. There's been absolutely no mention of her personal life. Though she's made sure that I now know Giles has married some chick named Olivia, Red and Ken are married, and Xander's datin' a Slayer named Renee. She even told me about this guy named Connor that Dawn's been seein'.

I'm not so sure that I should complain about the lack of info on her personal life, though. Maybe I should just count my blessings and leave it at that 'cause I really don't wanna hear about her latest boy-toy. No, I'd rather listen to her go on and on about everyone else in Cali. Fuck, she's cute.

I'm startin' to make myself sick with as often as that statement keeps crossin' my mind. Has it just been so long since I've been in the presence of another bein' for an extended amount of time that my brain's just gone to mush? There's somethin' really messed up about that.

"Are you even listening to me, Faith?"

Huh? I jerk my head up and bite back a smirk at the pout she's givin' me.

"Yeah, 'course I am, B."

"Are you sure? 'Cause it kind of looked like you were drifting there."

"Jesus," I mutter in exasperation. "Yes, I was listenin' to ya, B. Ya were tellin' me 'bout ya new crib out in Cali. You just said somethin' 'bout your new puppy goin' ape-shit and tearin' your covers to shreds."

"Oh," She blinked. "I guess you were listening."

Not really, but she doesn't need to know that. I just tuned in long enough to figure out what she was talkin' about and then went back to my thoughts. What can I say? I've got mad skills, yo.

"Yup," I nod in agreement.

"So we bought the new linens..."

And she's off again. Why does she think I wanna know any of this? I didn't when I was alive. I sure as fuck don't now.

Why haven't I shut her up yet? I must've lost my fuckin' mind 'cause I think I've actually missed her voice. A low, aggravated growl escapes without my permission.

She blinks at me in surprise and then asks, "Are you okay?"

I give her a weak smile. "Yeah, I'm just fuckin' peachy. So you were sayin' 'bout the paint job?"

Don't need her askin' what it was all about so maybe a subject change will help. Well, miracle of miracles, it did. Usually she's as persistent as fuck when she wants somethin'.

Oh Jesus fuckin' Christ, Mary and Joseph she's whacked in the head. It's almost noon, for God's sake. Hello? Vampire, here—I'm supposed to be asleep right now!

How did Angel and Spike put up with her? Oh wait, I know the answer to that. Forget I even asked. I know how. I can't just tell her to go away, 'cause then she'll give me that wounded look and I'll cave faster than anything. Fuck.

I yawn, my mouth openin' wide enough that I'm sure she can see my tonsils. My jaw pops and I let out a sigh as I close my mouth with a clack of my teeth. I don't get why my body still functions almost normally, with the exception of a heartbeat and normal blood flow. I still get the usual urges, like breathing, eating, sleeping, and pretty often, I get horny and wanna fuck too.

Somethin' is missin' and it takes me a minute to realize what it is. I blink and look at B. She's just sittin' there starin' at me quietly.

"What?"

She gives me a guilty look. "Sorry, I didn't realize how late it was getting. Should I go now?"

Yes! My mind screams. No, no, can't tell her that. I slump back against the couch and give her a reassurin' smile.

"Nah, that's aight, B."

She gives me a wry smile. "No, it's not. But that's fine. I'll just come back later tonight."

"Wait, B. Why don't you just go ahead and tell me why you're really here?"

She lets out a shuddering breath and her smile fades. "You know why I'm here, Faith."

I shrug, "Maybe, maybe not. We won't know for sure 'til ya ask."

No way am I gonna make this easy on her. She's comin' in here, interruptin' my life. I wouldn't be me if I didn't give her a hard time for that.

She gazes at me in silence for a long time. I guess she's tryin' to decide if it's worth it or not. Her shoulders slump and I grin inwardly.

"We need your help," She says hoarsely.

"What can I do that you can't get done?"

She rubs her hands over her thighs and leans forward again. "We've learned that there's an army of demons and vamps forming a new community. The ones we've interrogated tell us it's pretty sophisticated and organized. All they can tell us about the leader is that he's vicious and that most of the local vamps steer clear of him. We haven't been able to locate their hideout yet."

I nod, "Aight, and that involves me, how?"

She sighs, "Even when we do find it, I don't want to go in completely unprepared. We need to know what to expect, and none of my people would last long in that environment. The moment a vampire catches scent of them, it'll be chow time."

"What about Red's mojo? Couldn't she do anything to help?"

"We have reason to believe they have a warlock working for them. It would be too much of a risk."

"And the reason you ain't usin' Angel or Spike on this?"

She bites her bottom lip and then releases it. Her eyes peer at me from under long, thick blonde lashes and she asks softly, "Why are you being so defensive, Faith? I thought you would help."

"I ain't sayin' that I won't. I'm just tryin' to figure out what the sitch is, B. Now answer the fuckin' question."

Her jaw clenches and she growls, "Fine. They're too well known. It wouldn't take long before some vampire with half a brain recognized either of them."

I nod. That I can buy. Most vampires have at least a rudimentary knowledge of Angelus and William the loody.

"What does this army have to do with Slayers bein' killed?"

The golden flecks in her hazel eyes flare with anger when she answers, "We think they're being used for initiations."

Now it's my turn to grind my teeth. I may technically not be one any more, but just the thought of it still pisses me off like you wouldn't believe. I blow out a harsh breath.

"So you need me to do what?"

She hesitates and then says coolly, "We need you to help us locate their base and infiltrate them. I don't know how long you'll have to go undercover, or what you might have to do, but it has to be done in order to prevent unnecessary bloodshed."

She's willin' to let me do this alone? I wouldn't have thought she'd trust me enough, but there hasn't been a single mention of a team, a partner, or anything. Maybe she sees just how much of a liability anyone else would be for me in the situation she's describin'.

But, first thing's first. "I don't know if that's such a good idea, B."

She looks at me, startled, "Why?"

"They're gonna expect things of me you ain't gonna approve," I can hear the edge in my tone. I'm surprised by her answer though.

Steel seeps into her voice, "Whatever it takes, Faith."

I can feel the shift of my features and I peer at her through eyes narrowed by the ridges and angles that have formed. She sucks in a breath and I smirk.

"Remember you said that," I snarl.

Chapter Three: Home, Sweet Home

I step off the Council's private jet and set my feet on the tarmac with somethin' like relief. I hate flyin'. It ain't that I'm afraid, I just can't stand it. Bein' forced to stay in one place makes me antsy, and you ain't got too many other options when you're that high in the sky.

I let out a breath and glance around. Good ol' Cali. I can feel the vibe of the place seepin' into my body all ready. There's just somethin' about this place... It really gets under my skin.

I glance back to see B comin' down the stairs with her bag slung over her shoulder. I shift mine and sigh. We haven't really talked much since we tied up our plans. She left my place and I went to sleep, dead to the world for seven and a half hours.

When I woke up, I drank and ate before I called to see if she'd arranged everything. All she said was for me to be at the airport in an hour and a half, and then she gave me the flight info and ended the call. Now here we are.

That had to have been the tensest flight I've ever taken. She didn't say a word to me the entire time. Five hours and not one single word, but she kept lookin' at me like she was expectin' somethin'. I ain't too sure what that was all about.

I hear a car approachin' and I glance around. I tense at the sight of a big black SUV slowin' to a stop a few feet away from where I'm standin'. I dart another glance back at B and I see that she's not worried. I guess it's our ride, then.

My guess is confirmed when Xander gets out of the driver's side. I still don't know what she's told them about this little visit. I have to admit that I'm kinda curious about how she explained me comin' back with her.

"Hey, Xan," I call out.

"Faith," He answers with a nod.

I guess I can't put it off any longer. I walk towards him slowly. Don't want him thinkin' I'm about to attack or nothin'.

"How's it hangin'?"

He shakes his head, "I'm not falling for that one. You'll have to try a little bit harder."

I grin widely. He doesn't flinch like I expected him to at the sight of my fangs. I'll take that as a good sign.

"Fine, then how's it goin'?"

"It's getting better all the time," He answers and reaches for my bag.

I step back, "Un-uh, save the chivalry for B. I can handle my own, y'know."

"Stop giving him a hard time," B's voice comes from behind me.

I glance back over my shoulder at her. "Stop takin' all my fun away, why don't ya?"

She rolls her eyes and hands Xander her bag. "Thanks, Xander."

"Any time, Buffster," He replies and then he walks around the SUV to the back.

I follow him slowly. When we reach the back, he pops the hatch and I let him settle Buffy's bag and then toss mine in. I leave him to shut the hatch and get into the backseat. I smirk when I see the DVD players and mini-screens set into the back of the seats and the panel of buttons and knobs set into the roof of the SUV.

Xander gets in and I ask, "Got ya ride all tricked out, don't ya?"

"Yeah," He replies as he starts the car. "I was surprised when Giles let us get all the bells and whistles."

It falls silent and I turn my attention to the panel between the two front seats. I reach up to fiddle with the buttons and my hand gets smacked away. I glare at the hazel eyes gazing back at me over B's shoulder.

"What? I was just gonna check it out."

"Uh-huh. More like you were going to mess with the settings until you overloaded the system. You forget that I know what you do when you go into an electronics store, Faith."

I smirk in reply. B quickly realized that taking me into RadioShack at the mall wasn't a good idea when we were kids. I've always had this weird fascination with pressing buttons. And if the result entertains me enough, I do it over and over.

Thwarted from my amusement, I slump back in my seat. This wasn't so bad. Hopefully the rest will be as easy, but I doubt it. There's always one person at least who wants to start shit.

The moment Dawn sees me climb out of the car, she squeals, "Faith!"

I flinch at the pitch, but I don't have time to rub my abused ear before she's jumpin' into my arms. I hug her in reflex. Either someone forgot to mention to her that I'm a vamp now, or she doesn't give a damn. With Dawn, I'm willin' to bet it's the latter.

She finally climbs down and grabs onto my arm like it's a life line as she tugs me towards the house. I chuckle at her.

"Hey, Dawn. How are ya?"

"I'm great. Oh my God, it's so good to see you," She says quickly.

"I'll get your bag," Xander calls from the back of the SUV.

I consider tellin' him to fuck off, but I decide against it. First day back, it wouldn't make a good impression. Maybe I can find a reason to tell him that next week. If I'm around next week, that is. I wince as I'm brought back to the reason why I'm here and I glance up at the house.

The sprawlin' three story brick house hasn't changed any. A flower garden adds some color to the otherwise plain appearance and the wooden swing on the front porch brings back some memories. I let out a tense breath. Not all of 'em good.

I chance a glance at B and see her lookin' worriedly at the house. Huh, wonder what that's all about. We climb the steps and Dawn finally releases me to go through the front door. I let her and B go in first and then I enter behind them.

My boots sound loud on the hardwood floor of the foyer. I look around and realized it's all still the same inside too. Two sets of staircases in front of us lead upstairs. The door to my left leads into Giles's study, the door to the right leads to the dinin' room and the kitchen, and a set of double doors between the staircases leads to the livin' room and the basement.

There's an almost unnoticeable door just inside the entrance to the house that's a coatroom. A few dark tan leather chairs line the walls along with a couple of oak end tables to form a sort of waitin' room.

Dawn catches my gaze and nods at the door to the left. "Giles and everyone else are waiting in there."

I nod. "So where am I stayin'?"

She grins, "Your stuff's still in your old room."

I flinch. "That's not gonna work, D. I don't get alone all that great with sunlight."

"I know, Faith. That's why Giles had the windows switched to the UV proof windows."

"Aight, well lemme take my stuff up and I'll be right back," I grin.

"Nah, Faith. I'll take care of it," Xander says as he strolls past me and B with our bags.

I tense and roll my eyes. I guess I won't be delayin' this any more. I reluctantly follow Dawn as she opens the door and enters the room.

Conversation halts when the room's occupants notice us. Ken's lookin' at me over Red's head from where she's sittin' on the chair arm in front of Giles's desk. There's a black woman leanin' against a corner of the desk and Giles is seated behind it. Spike, Angel and Gunn are standin' nearby in almost identical poses with their arms crossed over their chests.

Anyone else would be nervous at havin' that many people starin' at 'em. Fuck, I ain't anyone else and I'm nervous at havin' that many people starin' at me.

Chapter Four: Sheddin' Some Light

"Hey, Faith, what's up?" Kennedy breaks the silence and I let out a breath of relief.

Thanks, Ken. I could kiss ya for that one.

I shrug in reply, "Not a thing. B asked for my help, so here I am."

"Ah, yes. That's what she was telling us over the telephone. Thank you for coming," Giles says in a relieved tone.

I glance at him and then let my eyes drift to the others. Angel uncrosses his arms and looks like he's goin' to come over to me. I lift an eyebrow as I shake my head and he stops.

"Uh-uh, don't even think it, soul-boy. We ain't about to get all warm and fuzzy after what happened," I warn him coolly.

What? Motherfucker accuses me of bein' a mindless killin' machine like Angelus, tries to stake me, and thinks I'll forget about it? Fuck that.

B's the only one with a free pass for stupidity like that. And that ain't by choice. I just could never bring myself to kill her. The only thing keepin' me from gettin' stab happy with Angel is my gratitude for what he did way back when. There's also the fact that B would be seriously pissed if I did, too.

"Yeah, about that," Angel starts.

"No, don't bother. I don't wanna hear ya lame ass excuses," I interrupt sharply.

Giles clears his throat. "Perhaps you should listen to what he has to say, Faith."

If looks could kill, G-man would be toast. "Why? So I can hear his bullshit reasons for tryin' to end me and be all forgivin'? Fuck that, Giles. I ain't a soul-vamp, aight?"

He looks at me in confusion. "What are you talking about? I assumed that for whatever reason, your soul still remained."

"Maybe we should all get comfy before we start this conversation. I have a feeling it's going to be a long one," B interrupts.

I let out a rush of air and glance at her. I watch as the seats are quickly filled with impatient bodies and I shrug. I'd rather stand anyway. I sat long enough on the plane.

"What the bloody Hell is she doing here?" A British voice asks sharply from the doorway of the office.

I turn to find Wes standin' there. The look on his face tells me I've found my instigator for this visit. That fuckin' sucks. We were actually startin' to get along before.

The black woman, still leanin' against the desk next to Giles, clears her throat. "She's here to assist us with the situation, Wesley." She turns her attention to me and holds out a hand. "I'm Olivia, Rupert's wife."

"Nice to meet ya," I shake her hand briefly and return my attention to Wes.

"And how do we know that she won't decide to help them? She wasn't the most stable of persons when she was alive, and I honestly doubt she's any better—"

"Shut ya trap 'fore I shut it for ya," I growl and move toward him.

I don't care about first impressions right now. I just want him to be quiet. I didn't come here for this and I'll be damned if I'm just gonna put up with this shit.

Before I can reach Wes, a strong hand grabs my shoulder and jerks me to a stop. Angry, I turn and whatever words I might've had freeze in my throat. Deflated, I let my shoulders slump just a little.

Buffy gives me a sympathetic look and turns her attention to my intended victim. "Knock it off, Wes. It's understandable that you're a little scared. But I didn't bring her here to put up with your bullshit. She's here to help."

I blink a little in surprise. First, she's defendin' me. Second, Little Miss Straight Laced cursed. Third, fuck, she's gettin' me all kindsa hot here.

"Do we have any reassurances that she won't switch teams?" He asks and I can finally see that he really is frightened out of his mind.

Shit. These guys must be serious bad news if it's enough to have him stressin'. He usually holds up pretty damn strong in situations like this.

"I believe we were just getting to that. If everyone could take a seat, I'm sure Faith will answer what she can," Giles answers.

I shrug at the expectant look he gives me. Whatever gets people off my fuckin' back, I guess. It's a good thing I went to that Wiccan's coven after I was turned. Lenore gave me the answers they're probably lookin' for.

I'd been so fuckin' confused about what was happenin'. I'd tracked down a coven in Louisiana, hopin' to find some answers to my questions. Their leader, Lenore, gave me more info than I knew what to do with. I didn't understand what half of it meant, but I got the gist of it.

"Come on," Buffy grabs my arm and tugs me over to her chair in front of Giles's desk.

I raise an eyebrow at her in question and she ignores it as she sits down, then she grabs my arm again and pulls me down onto the chair arm. I just look at her for a few seconds and then I shake my head and turn my attention back to the rest of the group.

"Aight, so here's the long and short of it," I look around to make sure they're payin' attention. "I ain't got a soul."

"What? It's obvious that you're in complete control of your faculties, so how is that possible?" Giles interrupts.

I give him a sardonic look that quickly fades into a smirk. "The demon the Shadow Men infused the Slayer with is how. What the Watcher's Council didn't like to advertise was that when the infusion was finished, it had changed her genetic composition to that of a demon. A Slayer is no more human than Angel or Spike."

Wesley leans forward in his seat and asks, "How is that possible when they are born human?"

I bite my bottom lip and think about the explanation Lenore gave me. I shrug mentally. If they don't like it, too fuckin' bad for them. It's the truth.

"The callin' that so many girls have died for is no more than a fuckin' possession," I answer, sharper than I intend. "The demon's spirit passes from one girl to the next at her death, enhancin' the DNA strand all ready present that gives a Slayer her power."

Buffy places her hand on my arm and asks quietly, "How did you find this stuff out?"

I glance at her and I'm surprised to find that she's takin' this calmly. I'd half expected her to get all high and mighty about it. Guess she's changed a little too.

"After I finally accepted that this was what I was stuck with, I wanted answers and I found 'em in a coven in New Orleans."

"How is Lenore?" Red asks excitedly.

I glance at her and grin, "She was fine the last time I talked to her; which was last week. She gets testy if I don't call or e-mail her at least once a month."

"Wait," Angel interrupts. "If it happens upon the girl's death, as we all know it does, shouldn't the demon's spirit have left you all ready?"

I sigh, "Yeah. That's where it gets screwy. It has to choose to leave."

"And yours hasn't?" Spike asks in confusion.

"No," I answer slowly. "It hasn't, obviously."

"I've never heard of anything like this. Do you know how the spirit is managing to stay?" Giles asks.

I lower my head and slump back against the chair. My shoulder brushes against B's and I feel a little bit better. I glance up and let out a breath.

"The demon was given free reign when everything went down in Sunnydale. When that happened, it gained enough strength to cling to the physical realm."

"Shouldn't you be murder-queen again then?" Xander asks.

I glance sharply at him. I hadn't even noticed him come in. Realizin' that the question's actually kinda valid, I soften my look a little.

"The darkness influenced my actions, but didn't always control them. The demon they infused the Slayer with wasn't naturally inclined to be bad. It was more apathetic, very few of its' kind had evil tendencies. Lenore thinks that's why the Shadow Men chose it."

"Yes, that would make sense," Giles mused. "But it doesn't explain why you aren't behaving badly. I would think that the demons would negatively influence each other."

I snort, "Nice way to put it, G-man. I guess it's 'cause the demon's spirit kinda cages the vampire the way the gypsy curse does Angelus."

"So you've been completely in control this entire time?" Giles asks.

I nod, "Yeah."

I see them all exchange glances and I go from mildly amused to worried, real fast. Silence falls for long moments. The only sounds are the tickin' of the clock on the wall across the room and several sets of breathin'.

I can't hold my question in much longer and I ask tensely, "What the fuck's wrong? I thought that was a good thing."

Giles clears his throat. "It could actually prove to be a problem."

"Why?"

"If you go into their operation, they're likely to expect certain behavior."

I shrug with forced nonchalance, "Yeah? So?"

"Also, we have no way of knowing how you'll react," Angel adds. "If darkness is what it takes to unleash the demon, putting you in that situation is asking for trouble."

"Whoa, whoa, hold up!" I say sharply and stand. "What the fuck are ya babblin' about?"

"Think about it, Faith," Angel answers. "You haven't given into the bloodlust. It could be all it takes to make you lose control."

Chapter Five: The Problem with Vampires

"I'm willin' to take the risk," I reply as I settle back onto the arm of B's chair.

"We're not," Wesley breaks into the conversation. "It's not you that will have to worry about an abnormally strong, slightly psychotic vampire coming after you, now is it?"

I laugh humorlessly and lean towards him. "Listen, Wes. I understand your worries. But it's me or ya precious Slayers. Are ya willin' to let more of 'em die 'cause you're afraid of what might happen?"

"Stop it, both of you," Buffy interrupts us. "There are a few issues we need to work out, but at this point, Faith's our only chance, Wesley."

"She's right," Giles concedes. "As much as I hate going into this blindly, we have no other option. We'll keep our eyes open for other opportunities, but for now we'll stick to the original plan."

"Aight, so lemme see if I got this right. I find their base, get in on their operation and then..." My eyebrows arch. "Find out as much as I can, like numbers, what they're armed with, skill, makeup, plans, and other shit like that?"

"Yes," Giles answers. "We also need you to try to get as close to the leader as you can without putting yourself into too much danger. No one knows anything about him other than the rumors, and those have been fairly disturbing."

I laugh, "G-man, the entire situation is dangerous, but I get what you're puttin' down. How am I supposed to stay in contact?"

"We don't know yet," He answers and shakes his head. "We'd need to know the general setup first."

"You realize I can't stay here, right?" I ask with a smirk.

B grabs my arm and leans forward to look into my eyes. "Why can't you? I mean, I get that you're probably uncomfortable 'cause it's been so long, but—"

I place my hand over her mouth and shake my head. "Slow ya roll, B. That ain't it."

She jerks away and narrows her eyes at me. "Don't do that. And if that's not it, then why?"

"Think about it, B. If they see me here, then the whole plan is fucked."

"You have a point," Giles says ruefully.

"'Course I do, but that ain't it," I answer dejectedly.

"Do you even have a point, Faith?" Buffy asks dryly.

I look at her. "Where do most vamps live, B?"

I can see her fightin' the laugh that's just dyin' to escape as understandin' dawns, but I don't see what's so funny. Unless I can find an abandoned house I can board up, I'll have to live in some crappy mausoleum. I left Georgia for this?

Aight, so we eventually got things hammered out enough that I could go to bed. The sky is startin' to get that light pink tint to it that signals the arrival of dawn when I reach my old bedroom. I enter the room, but before I can close the door I hear a voice call my name.

"Faith, wait."

I poke my head out into the hall to see Angel and Spike comin' down the hall. I consider shuttin' and lockin' the door but decide against it. I ain't that immature, at least not right now anyway. Doesn't mean I have to be nice, though.

"What the fuck do you want, soul-boy?"

"We need to talk to you," He answers and gestures to Spike.

I roll my eyes and glance toward the bay window at the end of the hall to my right. It won't be long 'fore the sun is up. I jerk the door open further and step back.

"Then get in here 'cause I ain't interested in becomin' extra crispy," I grumble.

They enter my room and with a perverse sense of pleasure, I walk over to the window and open the curtains. I lift the blinds and peer out over the expanse of the back yard.

"So what do ya want?" I ask without turnin' to look at either of 'em.

This is the first time I've gotten a direct view of the sunrise in four years. I ain't gonna let their presence ruin it for me. The sight of it used to take my breath away and it filled me with wonder and warmth. The past four years were spent longin' for that feelin' and knowin' I couldn't have it.

I guess they understand 'cause neither of 'em is complainin' about it. They both move up on either side of me and look out as well. I catch sight of the tiny smiles on their lips out of the corners of my eyes and smirk. I wonder if it's the darkness within us that makes us crave the light.

We're silent as the rays of light inch their way across the sky until there's not an inch of darkness left in sight. I'm amused to find that I'm still as enthralled by the sunrise as I ever was. It's actually a nice feelin', to find that while the more things change, the more they stay the same.

"We need to talk about the plan," Angel starts hesitantly.

"What about it? I thought it was pretty straightforward and thought out."

"It wasn't, not really," Spike answers.

I arch an eyebrow, unseen as they both move away from the window. I cross my arms over my chest and slowly turn away from the window to lean back against the frame.

"What's the problem, boys? I'm fine with what they came up with before I got here."

"Do you think you'll actually be able to go through with it?" Angel asks pointedly.

Tryin' to pretend I don't know what he's talkin' about, I say, "Yeah. I'll be fine."

"I don't think you fully understand everything this course of action entails," He says gravely.

I sigh, "I get that you're lookin' out for me, Angel, but I'm a big girl. I can take it."

"It'll change everything," Spike interrupts heatedly.

"Look," I snap. "I get that I'm gonna have to be the demon for a while. I know that people will die and God knows, I don't want any more blood on my hands, but that'll happen regardless. If I do nothin', more blood will be on my hands anyway 'cause I could've prevented it and did nothin' instead."

"If you back out, we'll understand," Angel says gently.

I laugh scornfully. "Yeah, you might. But I won't, and B sure as fuck won't."

He growls, "Fuck Buffy! Let's just forget her for now. It's you I'm worried about."

I push off from the frame and rush over to him, grabbin' his shirt collar and shovin' him up against the wall. Spike simply moves out of the way, knowin' I can more than take both of 'em. We just stare at each other for a long moment.

I get up in his face and snarl, "Don't you get yet, Angel? I can't forget Buffy! That's my fuckin' problem."

I see the understandin' startin' to leak into his expression and laugh. I can't believe he hadn't realized it yet. All these years, and all the bullshit I did... It was all because of her and the feelings I never wanted. It took my own death for me to finally accept that I was in love with her.

I continue in an anguished tone, "As much as the thought of what I'm gonna have to do is fuckin' me up inside, I have to do it. I'm gonna get some sleep, drink some pig's blood, go hunt for a place to crash, and then track these motherfuckers down, all 'cause I can't do anything else."

I let him slide down the wall and release him. I step back and shake my head when Spike goes to say somethin'. I look back at Angel and shrug.

"It's just the way things are. Spike gets it," I jerk my head at the bleach-blonde. "It's why he helped 'em back in SunnyHell when he was chipped."

Angel's eyes track from my face to Spike to see him give a knowin' grin. He sighs.

"So you think you can handle this?"

I nod, "Yeah. I know I can."

"And you're sure you want to do this alone?"

I smirk, "I don't have a choice, Angel. Everyone here would be a liability and I wouldn't trust anyone else to have my back."

I wouldn't really trust anyone here to have my back either, except maybe Red, Ken, or B. But I don't gotta rub it in his face that he fucked up big time. I think he gets it by now.

"Okay, I guess that's it then."

Angel turns and heads for the door. He opens it and shoves Spike out first.

"Hey, watch it, Nancy-boy!"

He ignores Spike and glances back at me. He hesitates and then smiles, "Listen, I know what you said down there, but—"

I shake my head, "I get it, Angel. As pissed as I still am, I know that if the vamp had been in control, the human part of me would've wanted you to stake her."

He nods, "Yeah."

I watch him turn to leave and I smirk when he hesitates again. He turns back once more.

"If you need any help with anything, you know you can come to me, right?"

"Yeah," I nod and wave him out of the room. "Now, get gone. I need my beauty sleep. Somethin' tells me I ain't gonna be gettin' much of that soon."

I watch the door shut behind him. The problem with vampires, I muse. Is that we ain't got too many brain cells. Why else have so many of us fallen victim to Buffy's charms?

Chapter Six: Recruitment in the Interim

I've been trackin' this guy for three hours. We made our way through the residential areas, the business areas, and now we're creepin' through the back half of the warehouse district. It's startin' to get kinda borin'.

I gotta stay patient though, 'cause I gotta find out where this guy's goin' 'fore I head to my new place. I got a schedule and I wanna stick to it. It's strange as all Hell, but it wasn't really my idea either. Before I could leave the house after a last minute meetin' earlier, B asked me to set it up so we could have a fixed time and place to meet.

I reluctantly did and then I slipped out 'fore any more interruptions could come. I decided on where I was gonna crash, and fixed it up a little. Before I knew it, I nearly stumbled across the blonde vamp I'm followin' talkin' to someone else in the alley behind my new place. He was runnin' his mouth about some vamp named "Joaquin".

When he mentioned somethin' about joinin' Joaquin's army, I figured I'd found what I was lookin' for. It was confirmed when I heard 'em jokin' 'bout stickin' it to the Slayers durin' their initiation. 'Course, at that point, I had to force myself not to tear into 'em.

Blondie's approachin' the largest warehouse in this section of the warehouse district and I look for a place to hide. I duck into an alcove between two warehouses and crouch down into the darkest of the shadows. I scope out the situation and wince.

Joaquin isn't takin' any chances. The area's lit up with rotatin' search lights and a fence surrounds the parameter. Two guards are at the gate in the fence and I can see a few walkin' the boundary inside. There's a couple pacin' on the roof too.

I can't quite make out the guns the roof guards are packin', but I'd guess that they're probably sniper rifles. The guards at the gate have rifles strapped to their backs. One of 'em sweeps his jacket back and puts his hands on his hips as he talks to Blondie. He's wearin' a double shoulder holster and the second gun makes my blood boil.

The first is a Semi-Automatic Double Action Smith & Wesson. I recognize it 'cause a buddy of mine in Boston used to pack one. The second is a modified Jericho 941 F. The grip of the gun's been replaced by a clear handle and I can see slivers of the glowin' blue liquid that fills the bullets inside the magazine.

Ever wonder what reaction a vamp has to chemical radiation burns? It's about like shovin' 'em outside, mid-afternoon. Imagine puttin' that inside 'em. It makes for a wicked explosive mix.

Oh, God, I want one. I've seen 'em, but never had the cash for it. Before this is over and done with, I'm gettin' me one of 'em, damn it. For now, though, I gotta go let B know what I found out. Then I'm takin' my ass home for a warm mug of blood and maybe a porno or two.

B's lookin' at me like I just gave the answer to life's greatest mystery. I bite back a laugh and lean against the wall of the mausoleum. I shrug at her.

"Ain't nothin' big, B. I just got lucky enough to come across the right vamp."

She lets out a tense chuckle. "We've been struggling to find even the tiniest scrap of information on where their lair is for weeks and then you come in and find it in less than twenty-four hours. That's... amazing, really."

"Nah," I grunt, "Ain't anything amazin' about it, B. All I did was track a vamp that wasn't smart enough to pay attention to what his instincts were screamin'."

"Mmm. So did you find a place to stay?"

"Yeah, it's this tiny little place over on Wilshire Drive. It ain't that great, but it'll do."

"Maybe you won't be stuck there for long."

"It's a good thing I'm used to bein' alone," I sigh. "Otherwise this whole fuckin' thing would be drivin' me nuts."

She looks at me in concern, "How are you doing with being back here? I know you seem really uncomfortable, but that could just be the situation."

I scrub my face roughly and push off the wall, "It's a little bit of everything, really. But I gotta get goin'."

Before I know what she's doin', she tugs me into a hug. I'm frozen for a long moment and then she starts to pull away in embarrassment. I shake myself out of my stupor and pull her back against me.

"Sorry, caught me by surprise there," I choke out.

"It's okay," She whispers gently and buries her face in my neck.

I wrap my arms tightly around her and revel in the feelin' of her tight little body pressin' against mine. The scent of lavender surrounds me and her warmth makes me wanna sink into her and never leave. Tears fill my eyes and I squeeze 'em shut, fightin' to keep the tears in. It's been so long since we've been this close and for a while there I'd thought it wouldn't happen ever again.

Sometimes it's so easy to forget the connection we have. We've fought it, but there isn't any denyin' it's there when we're alone. When we're fightin' it's like we can't get enough distance between us... But when we're gettin' along, we can't get close enough.

It's why we've pushed each other away so often. It scares us both to death. I think maybe now I can get past that fear. I nuzzle the side of her head and hear a sigh that matches my own.

She squeezes me and then steps back. "I'll see you here tomorrow night, same time?"

"Yeah," I answer quickly and then I duck out the entrance.

"Don't move," A voice hisses in my ear.

The barrel of a gun jams into my ribcage and I slowly lift my arms. It's been two days since I set out on my own. I've been tryin' to find out how to catch Joaquin's attention ever since and I think maybe I've caught it. It wasn't really intentional though.

A vamp had tried to jump me just outside this cemetery and I made quick work of him. Then a bunch more had leaped out of the shadows and it was on. I managed to fight 'em off and that's when I found myself in this situation. I could kick this guy's ass, but that would defeat the point, wouldn't it?

"Aight, I ain't movin'. Can I ask what the fuck this is all about?"

He chuckles and trails the gun across my torso as he circles me. He stops in front of me as he puts the gun away and lets his gaze caress me. It's almost impossible to keep my disgust from showin'.

Yeah, he's hot. If he were human, I might do him. And yes, I'm perfectly aware of how fucked up that is since I'm a vampire too. But I still like my bodies warm.

He's got dark hair, darker eyes and a natural, dark golden complexion I'm guessin' lets him pass for human every once in a while. His hair reaches his collar in loose curls and his thin eyebrows are finely arched. His cheekbones are high and his face is all angles and muscle.

He has better taste in clothes than most of the vamps I've ever met, though. He's wearin' a silk red shirt and well-cared for black leather pants. Between him, Angel, me and Spike, we might be able to do some good for vamps everywhere.

Too bad for them I gotta stake this fucker. I'm gonna enjoy the fuck out of it, though. The glint in his eyes makes my skin crawl and somethin' about the way he's lookin' at me's really startin' to piss me the fuck off.

"You're one rude son of a bitch, y'know that?"

I always have had a problem stayin' quiet for long. Maybe one day I'll learn to keep my mouth shut. Not.

He glances over his shoulder and shares a laugh with his buddies. Then he turns back to me and before I can react, he backhands me. I let my head roll with the force of it and then straighten to glare at him. I lick the blood from the corner of my mouth as I let my face shift into the vamp's distortion.

He chuckles again, "You aren't from around here, are you, gorgeous?"

"Nah, I just arrived a couple days ago." Well, it ain't a lie. He ain't gotta know I've lived here before.

"Well, since you're new to town, I'll be fair," He answers slowly.

"That's just fuckin' great," I answer sarcastically.

"I," He pats my cheek hard, "Am," Another smack, "Joaquin." He smacks me harder this time. "Everything I say, goes."

I'm diggin' my nails into the palms of my hands to keep from wailin' on this motherfucker. I was worried about whether I'd blow my cover by not bein' able to feed. Right now, I'm more concerned that I'll blow it by tearin' their leader apart.

"Do you have nothing to say, gorgeous?"

"Yeah, keep callin' me that and you'll find out just why my friends call me Destroyer."

B came up with that ridiculous nickname. We didn't think I should use my actual name, since chances are that he might hear about me at some point. I thought about arguin' but I really couldn't come up with anything better.

He chuckles, "I'll bet that is a rather interesting tale. So what do I call you, hmm?"

I give him a sly smile, "Call me Troy."

He throws an arm over my shoulders and leads me away. "Well, Troy. How would you like to join my army?"

Forcin' myself not to shove him away, I inject a small amount of intrigue into my voice, "An army? Ya don't say."

"Yes, and after the way you handled yourself with my men, I believe you're perfect for it, Troy. There are all sorts of benefits for someone as motivated as you. Getting to kill the Slayers is just one of them. We might even let you keep one as a pet, if you'd like."

"Show me," I hiss.

I wonder how he'd feel if he knew I vamped out 'cause I wanna tear him apart and not 'cause I wanna get my hands on a Slayer. Don't get me wrong, I wanna get my hands on a Slayer, but only one particular Slayer and not that way.

Chapter Seven: The Problem with Slayers

"Where is she?" The blonde muttered. "It wasn't bad enough that I have two slayers that went missing tonight, now I have to worry about her too?"

Buffy paced the floor of the mausoleum impatiently. Faith was an hour late and she was starting to worry. If it were any other time, she'd believe Faith was just being Faith; irresponsible, irrational and irritating. But the other Slayer knew the seriousness of the situation.

She blew out a sharp breath and shook her head. She still had a hard time thinking of Faith as a vampire and not a Slayer. Though if she understood what the other woman had said the previous morning, she was technically still a Slayer.

Her first reaction when Willow and Kennedy had made their report... She hadn't dealt well, and that was putting it lightly. She'd done everything from accusing them of lying to blaming it on them. It had taken them months to get past the hurtful, cruel words they'd all spewed. The argument was still a sore spot for all three women.

Buffy let out an explosive breath and glanced at the sports watch on her right wrist one more time. Another half hour had passed and still no sign. She stopped pacing and ran her hand through her hair.

If she looked for Faith, she might be placing them both in danger. If she did find her, she might not even be in trouble and that would lead to extensive teasing. She knew that from experience. But, if she didn't look for her friend and Faith was in danger...

The blonde's heart gave her answer for her. She couldn't take that chance when she'd only just gotten Faith back in her life. They had way too many things they really needed to talk about.

"Oh, I am so going to kill her," Buffy groaned and headed for the entrance to the mausoleum.

(Faith's POV)

There are things you don't notice when you stay away from other people. I've realized that since B came back into my life. Like, I never noticed just how cute it is when she says the word 'okay'.

Well, aight... maybe I did notice that one. I just wasn't willin' to admit it at the time. But seriously, I never noticed just how bad close proximity to a vamp makes me itch for a stake. Maybe that's why I spent a lot of time tryin' to kill Angel.

Nah, I just wanted him dead 'cause he put his paws on my girl. I blow out an inaudible breath and glance around. Bein' surrounded by vamps is settin' my internal alarms off violently.

We haven't even made it back to their encampment yet. Halfway there, we were met by a group of Joaquin's men that were lookin' for him. They've been whisperin' excitedly to him this entire time as others set up a makeshift seatin' area. I'm just grateful it got him to take his hands off me.

I hope this hasn't got anything to do with B. Knowin' her though, she's probably knee deep in trouble by now. I ain't the only one who has problems with followin' orders, y'know.

I glance around and notice a couple of vamps approachin'. They're leadin' people on leashes behind 'em. I tilt my head and furrow my brows.

Now, if that don't beat all... I guess that's what that son of a bitch meant by keepin' a Slayer as a pet. I guess normal humans are acceptable too, 'cause those chicks ain't Slayers.

"Tonight, we celebrate!" Joaquin's boisterous laughter calls his approach to my attention.

I tense as a hand claps my shoulder heartily and force a grin, keepin' my eyes on the two "pets". I lower my voice to a purr, "Really? I do love a good party."

"I'm glad to hear it," He answers happily and looks to where I'm starin'. "Ah, I see you've found a couple of our pets."

"Yeah," I nod. "Why haven't they been turned yet?"

He grins, "Ah, we don't turn anyone unless they prove to be worthy. Until then, we keep them to feed off of occasionally."

"I get ya."

He gives me a warnin' look, "Anyone caught draining or turning someone without my permission will immediately be dealt with."

"No worries there," I mutter.

He briskly answers, "Good."

A vampire grabs one of the "pets" and her scream is quickly cut off by a hand over her mouth. He sinks his fangs into her neck and I tense. I force myself to watch, knowin' that the slightest thing could give me away.

The contradictin' feelings the sight evokes have me so confused I'm gettin' a headache. On one hand I'm angry at havin' to just stand here and let it go on. The part of me that's the Slayer wants to feel his body give way to my strength.

On the other... Oh God, I choke back bile and my stomach turns as I'm forced to admit it. On the other, I can almost taste the hot rush of her blood pumpin' down my throat. I want so badly to feel the tender flesh of her neck give way to my hunger.

"Ah," Joaquin murmurs. "I see that you are feeling the thirst, my young friend."

I clench my jaw for a moment to keep from sayin' anything that could get me in trouble. When I feel calm enough I turn to look at him. I just study him for a sec before I answer him.

"You could say that."

"Let me see what I can do about that," He says as he looks around. "Ah, there we are. I'll be right back."

I watch in horror as he approaches a vamp holdin' two leashes. They speak for a moment and then the other vamp smiles broadly. Joaquin takes the offered leash and leads a small blonde towards me.

Oh fuck. The tinglin' warns me before they even reach me. This one is a Slayer.

She lifts her head groggily and our gazes lock. Her eyes are glazed and now that I'm lookin' closer, I can see that her breathin' is kinda elevated. Drugs, I realize.

"Let me tell you this, Troy," Joaquin says with a wide grin. "You will never taste anything like Slayer's blood."

My mind's racin' for excuses as to why I can't do this. He's gonna get suspicious if I turn it down. I have to try at least once, though.

"She's drugged, ain't she?"

"Yes, it's the only way to keep them without endangering ourselves. The drugs are completely safe for us however. They're a simple herbal mixture Aiden, my warlock, cooked up. Of course, we let it wear off for initiation night," He laughs as he holds the leash towards me.

I feel my stomach drop. The only excuse I could find was that I don't like my food to be tampered with, but he just shot that down with his answer. I take the leash reflexively.

"Why do ya let it wear off for initiation night?"

"The soldiers in my army have to be strong enough to defeat a Slayer and the Slayer has to be at full strength to provide a real fight," He answers with a low laugh.

"Yeah, I get that," I answer absently.

He gives me an expectant look, "Now, aren't you going to have a taste? I promise you won't be disappointed."

I reluctantly turn my attention to the woman in front of me. She's shakin' so bad I can see it without even tryin' and tears are trailin' silently down her face. Oh God, I don't wanna do this. But even as I'm thinkin' that, my face is shiftin' forms.

I glance around and spot a pile of colorful pillows that have been scattered in one corner of the parkin' lot we're standin' in. I make my way over there, guidin' the Slayer along behind me and tryin' to ignore Joaquin's silently pacin' figure. We reach the pillows just as a couple of vamps move one of the cans of burnin' debris nearby for light.

I blow out a breath and hesitate. I know this ain't gonna be very believable if I keep bein' gentle with this chick, but I don't want to make things worse. I look to our left and the sight of a vamp tearin' into the neck of another woman makes me wince. It could be a lot worse for her than anything I might do, though.

I shove her down onto the pile of pillows and climb behind her. I grab a handful of her hair and force her head to the side to bare her throat. I let my eyes trace the area near her pulse and my attention narrows in on that point until it's all I see. I lower my mouth and just as my fangs graze the pale skin, my eyes lift and what I see makes me curse silently as I freeze.

Goddamn her. She couldn't just stick to the plan, could she? I didn't want her to have to see me do this shit, but she's left me with no choice now. And on top of that, I have to find a way to get her out of trouble, too.

our guards are comin' towards us, draggin' a strugglin' form between 'em. The familiar pair of hazel eyes lookin' back at me in terrified disbelief makes me curse again. The problem with Slayers, I muse. Is that they never, ever stick to the plan.

Chapter Eight: The Demon Within

In the time that it takes for Joaquin to notice their approach, my mind examines and discards a few ideas. The first involves stakin' him, grabbin' B and haulin' ass back home. I nixed that one simply 'cause I know B would get pissed at abortin' the mission. The second one involves ignorin' B and goin' about my business and my reaction to that one should be fairly obvious.

The third one I don't like, but sometimes a vamp's gotta do what a vamp's gotta do. In this case, it involves some good old fashion violence between me and B. We've done it before, so it really ain't anything new. Except this time it makes me angry 'cause I don't have any other option.

"Well, well. What do we have here?" Joaquin laughs as he stands, "If it isn't the illustrious Chosen One, herself."

He reaches out to touch her face and I'm surprised at the amount of vitriol I feel at the action. There are vivid images of death and mutilation flitterin' through my head, and he's the star of all of 'em. Who knew I could be so fuckin' inventive? I grin as Buffy spits at him and jerks away from his touch.

I shove the Slayer in my arms aside and stand next to Joaquin. I tilt my head and study B through narrowed eyes. I start at the toe of her boots and work my way up her body, pausin' to admire the frustrated, rapid rise and fall of B's chest. It ain't the only thing I'm admirin' there either.

By the time I've reached her eyes, it's pretty obvious just what I was doin'. She's starin' daggers at me and the clenchin' and relaxin' of her jaw muscles tells me that she's grindin' her teeth. At the same time, a flush of shame and anger is workin' its' way up her neck to her face and I smirk.

"I want this one."

Joaquin laughs and faces me. "You are ambitious for such a young one, Troy. Just how many years has it been since you were turned?"

"Four," I reply. "It's been four years since Dane turned me, and I sent him on a one way trip to Hell in return."

His face freezes in a study of surprise for just a moment and then a wide, cruel smile forms on his face. He studies me carefully for just a moment and taps his chin thoughtfully. The glint I spotted earlier has returned and a ball of nervous tension forms in my gut.

I realize with dismay exactly why it makes my skin crawl now. I saw it in the mirror a Hell of a lot when I was younger. It's the look of unrestrained malicious glee. It's what happens when the demon within is unleashed, I guess.

He turns his attention to Buffy's tiny form sprawled on the ground between the guards. He glances briefly at the bruised, bloodied guards and nods his head thoughtfully. Another second's deliberation and he smirks.

"I think would be fitting that the longest lasting Slayer is enslaved by a vampire as young as you, Troy," He answers slowly and snaps his fingers at one of the nearby vamps. "You, bring me a collar and leash along with some of Aiden's mixture."

"I won't need the mixture," I reply with brash arrogance.

At least that's what I'm sure it seems like to him. But I know B, and she ain't gonna fight me; at least not yet. When she realizes what I'm gonna have to do to get us out alive, that's when she's gonna do it.

Joaquin dismisses the vamp as he hurries to do his biddin' and then he glances at Buffy in amusement and pauses. I watch as he takes in the way her eyes refuse to leave me and then he laughs.

"Maybe you're right at that, my young friend."

The errand vamp returns quickly with the requested stuff and Joaquin kneels in front of Buffy. He grasps a tuft of her hair and I dig my nails into the palms of my hands again to keep from attackin' him as I see her wince. One of the guards takes the collar from him and places it around B's neck. Joaquin attaches the leash and stands, offerin' the leash to me.

"In that case, consider her a gift from me to you."

"Best fuckin' gift I ever received," I growl as I accept the leash.

He laughs. "I'm sure it is."

I tug on the leash as I growl, "Get the fuck up."

They're gonna expect a show and I'll have to give 'em one. At least I know B can take it, unlike that poor kid he was gonna make me drink from. I also realize that she's gonna have my head and not in the good way when this is over with.

She doesn't react quickly enough and I reach down, clutchin' a handful of her shirt in my fist and pullin' her up. She stumbles, fallin' right into my open arms and I laugh.

I ask slyly, "Eager much?"

I wrap an arm around her waist and drop the leash as I push her hair to the other side of her neck. I glance down at the lightly tanned skin below the black leather collar and the blood flowin' beneath her flesh has me enthralled. I lower my head slowly and brush my lips over her pulse point. I whimper softly and slide my tongue over the smooth skin.

It takes longer than I would've expected for B to start strugglin'. She punches me in the side and I grunt in response. She isn't even fightin' that hard, I realize. She's doin' it for show.

I restrain her with both arms and tighten my hold on her 'til I know it's gotta be painful. She squeaks in protest and forces her body to go limp against me. I grin and my lips brush against her ear.

"Be careful, Slayer," I hiss so low that she's the only one who can hear me.

"Fuck you," She snarls in reply.

"Oh you will," I laugh loudly in reply.

I lower my head to her neck once again and drag my fangs over the soft skin. I know I'm not imaginin' the shiver that moves her ever so slightly, or the subtle archin' of her neck. Oh, ho, this is too fuckin' good, I chuckle silently.

"You're dead, Faith. I mean it," She hisses in my ear.

"Mm-hmmm," I murmur and tease her skin with my fangs again. "Tell me another one."

She lets out an exasperated growl, "How about the one where I stake you in your sleep?"

"Don't think I like that one," I answer with one more pass of teeth over her neck.

"I can't believe you're doing..." She trails off with a low, hoarse moan when my fangs break through the skin.

My moan drowns hers out as hot, tangy blood fills my mouth. I should be disgusted, I know. But right now, the only thing that's registerin' in my mind is the warmth seepin' into my insides and the warm, squirmin' body in my arms. A low, throbbin' pulse swells my clit as I grind against her hip.

I stumble back towards the pile of pillow and drop to my knees, takin' her with me. I lay her down, not losin' contact with her artery. My knee falls between her open thighs and grinds up into her unconsciously. She returns the contact by shovin' her knee against my groin and I gasp as I break away from her neck.

I lap at the thin trickle of blood that leaks from the two puncture wounds and she tangles her fingers in my hair. We've both lost touch with where we are at this point. I sink my fangs into her neck once more and her fingers clench reflexively, holdin' me to her. Animalistic grunts escape us both as we rut against each other.

Her hands leave my hair and slide down my back 'til she finds the edge of my t-shirt. I groan against her flesh at the feel of her hands on my skin as her fingers caress my skin. Suddenly I feel her stiffen and her hands clutch at me as I hear her cryin' out senselessly. I continue to press my knee against her, lettin' her ride out her climax.

I let my fangs retract from her artery and my tongue soothes the puncture wounds again. I groan as a tiny orgasm rolls through me and bury my face against her neck. My hips continue to jerk against her, tryin' to find more release. Another wave rolls over me, this one more intense and I'm on the edge of unconsciousness for a long, breathless second.

I'm still sprawled on top of B when things start makin' sense again. There's still a lingerin' flush of heat circulatin' in my body and I feel kinda disconnected. I don't know if that was from drinkin' B's blood or from fuckin' her. I think it's a tossup.

Fuck, he wasn't kiddin' when he said I'd never taste anything like Slayer blood. I chuckle silently. This is the kind of high I never could've experienced when I was alive.

The sound of slow, loud clappin' snaps me out of the daze I was driftin' in. I jerk my head up and my eyes widen when I'm reminded of exactly where I am. Oh shit, B's gonna kill me for real.

Goddamn it. I scramble off of B and straighten my shirt. I might just let her. All the times I dreamed about a first time with B, this kinda shit wasn't even anywhere near my thoughts.

B sits up shakily and she gives me a lost, betrayed look as she huddles into herself. Jesus, I just want to hold her close and beg for her to forgive me but I know it ain't gonna happen anytime soon.

"Great show," Joaquin says loudly and saunters towards us.

I know I've done some bad things, but nothin' seems to hold a candle to what I just did to B. I guess this is kinda what Angel was tryin' to prepare me for. I thought I was ready for it, but I wasn't. Now I've gotta pull myself together 'cause I've all ready fucked one thing up, and I'll be damned if I'll fuck this up too.

I make a show of trailin' my tongue over my lips to gather the stray drops of blood. I try not to look at B, not wantin' to see the expression on her face. I stand and face him with a wicked grin.

"Glad you enjoyed it," I purr.

"Oh, that I did," He laughs. "Everyone else is ready to go, whenever you and your pet are."

I glance over at her and she stands on unsteady legs. I can see her reluctance at approachin' me and I arch an eyebrow, full of meanin'. Her shoulders slump and she makes her way over to me. I grab the leash that's danglin' from the collar at her throat and wrap it around my hand.

"Ready," I smirk at his disbelievin' look.

I guess he's confused at her sudden compliance, considerin' the shape his guards were in when they brought her over. Oh well, I won't be the one to clear up his confusion. As long as he keeps misinterpretin' her behavior, that'll be fine with me.

What he sees is that she's terrified and humiliated. What I see is that she's enraged, disgusted, hurt, and a whole host of other things. There might be a little bit of fear thrown in there somewhere, but I can guarantee that it ain't much.

Chapter Nine: Privileges and Limitations

The noise of the army's excitement has finally settled into somethin' a little more bearable. Their reaction to havin' bagged the leader of the Slayers was... somethin' to see. 'Course most of 'em are pissed that she's off limits 'cause she belongs to me. Joaquin made a show of remindin' 'em that touchin' other people's property was highly offensive to him, but I doubt their obedience will last for long.

The inside of the warehouse has been turned into an almost proper base. Joaquin's promised to give me a tour once he gets the troops calmed. What I can see all ready is fuckin' impressive.

A large table fills the center of the first floor and chairs encircle it. There are cages along the walls filled with weapons and other equipment of all kinds. Two sets of metal stairs on either side at the back of the warehouse lead to the other floors. I tilt my head back for a sec and note that I can see four landings at least.

I feel B's hand clutch my belt and chuckle silently. She's been livin' in my back pocket since we walked in here. I think she's more than a little freaked. Then again, it ain't natural to a Slayer to be surrounded by vamps and demons.

Now that I think about it, if this is makin' my internal alarms sound, it's probably makin' hers go ape-shit. Unless all the vamp sex has fucked hers up, that is. Ugh, necrophilia jokes ain't good for the mental state.

I feel B stiffen and glance around to see Joaquin approachin' us. I give him a grin.

"Guess they're happy?"

He smirks, "Ah, yes they are. Some are very disappointed that they won't have a chance to play with your pet, but they know my rules."

"Good to know. I'd hate to have to dust somebody for touchin' my property," I growl.

"Not to worry, my young friend. None here will lay a hand on her." He claps his hands together and changes the subject, "Now, about that tour. Are you still interested?"

"Yeah," I grunt.

"Great," He replies enthusiastically.

I follow him over to the cages linin' the left side of the room. B trails along after me, stayin' close to keep some slack on the leash. Now that we're gettin' closer, I can see that the set of cages he's leadin' us to contains metal cases.

He opens one of the cage doors and pulls out a case. He opens it and hands it to me with a grin.

"Now these, are my pride and joy. All of my soldiers are equipped with a set. This set is for you."

I let my eyes drop to the guns in the case and lick my bottom lip. Two of the modified Jericho 941 F's of my very own. I lift my gaze and find his again, what has to be a wicked grin formin'.

I chuckle, "Oh, ho, the bad boys an' girls do get all the fun toys."

"That we do," Joaquin laughs and lets his eyes track to Buffy's.

"That we do," He repeats.

I follow his gaze and lift my hand to trace a finger over her jaw. I can tell B wants to jerk her head away but she knows better. I let my fingertip rest on the center of her bottom lip for a sec and then my hand drops back to my side.

"Yeah," I murmur.

The tone of my voice causes an alarmed look to flash across B's face. I ignore it and turn my attention back to Joaquin. I lift an eyebrow at him.

"All part of the perks, eh?" I ask teasingly.

"And there are so many," He answers.

After a short tour of the contents of some of the cages, he leads us upstairs to the second floor. My mind is still on the firepower they've got. He has a variety of well-maintained weapons and he told me that he's in the process of makin' sure everyone in his army can handle any type.

"As you can see, the second and third floors are simply used as barracks," His voice interrupts my thoughts.

I look up and glance around, my eyebrow archin' at what I see. Neatly arranged bunks line the walls with a set of lockers and a trunk to the left and at the foot of each. I feel a small amount of concern and a good dose amusement at the continued organization of Joaquin's outfit.

"Fuck," Buffy chokes out quietly.

I snort and look at Joaquin to see if he heard her. He did. He's lookin' at her like she's dinner and I really don't like that. I sneer, almost unconsciously.

I look back at Buffy and grab her chin. I lean over and pull her into a harsh kiss before she can stop me. Her mouth parts in startled response and my tongue darts out to tease her lips before I slip it into the wet heat beyond. Her hands come up to my shoulders to shove me off and I wrap my arms tightly around her waist to hold her close as my tongue tangles with hers.

She struggles briefly and then falls limp against my chest as I feel the vibration of a groan in her chest. I slide one of my hands over her hip and up her flat tummy. I feel her squirm closer as I let my hand pause between her breasts and it's my turn to moan at the feel of her heart poundin' beneath the tight white t-shirt she's wearin'. I jerk my hand away and nip her bottom lip sharply before I release her with a harsh shove.

"Keep your mouth shut, bitch," I snarl.

I watch hungrily as she wipes at the thin line of blood streamin' from her lip. She looks at her fingers and then glares up at me. Her nostrils flare as she struggles visibly not to attack me in return.

I blow her a kiss and shrug as I turn to look at Joaquin. His game face is on and the look he's sportin' is disturbin' at best. I suppress a shudder and force my thoughts back to the matter at hand.

"What about the fourth floor?"

His eyebrows furrow and his face settles back into human form. He clears his throat.

"Only privileged members of the army are allowed up there. I'm afraid I cannot tell you more than that just yet." He claps his hands together. "Why don't we return downstairs and join the celebration?"

It's now that the sound of loud rock music and rowdy noise comin' from the lower floor registers. I glance at B for a sec and then pull her along as I follow Joaquin.

"Never could turn down an excuse to party."

When I reach the bottom of the stairs, I stop and look around. Some of the vamps and demons are dancin', some are startin' up games and challenges, and a few are startin' the more fulfillin' festivities. A vamp standin' a few feet away pulls one of the pets to him by her leash and sinks his fangs into her neck.

My eyes flutter shut and I breathe in deeply. The charged scents of lust and blood—need and hunger— hang heavy in the air like a bad mood and a wicked grin forms in response. I reopen my eyes and laugh as I swagger out onto the dance floor. The music is all ready callin' to me and my body responds without hesitation.

Chapter Ten: Did My Time

A new song begins and a wry smile edges my lips as I recognize the openin' to Korn's song, "Did My Time". I pull B to me by her leash and wrap an arm around her waist. The tension radiatin' off her doesn't deter me as I slip a thigh between her legs. I grip her hips and pull her close as I force her to move against me in time with the music.

Realized I can never win
Sometimes I feel like I have failed
Inside where do I begin

My mind is laughing at me
Tell me why am I to blame
Aren't we supposed to be the same?

That's why I will never tame
This thing that's burning in me

This song's the very definition of our relationship. I nip at her jaw and drop the leash as I tangle my fingers in her hair. I force her head aside and drag my tongue up her neck.

I knew I couldn't win the second I met B and saw the devotion almost everyone had to her. I've been a failure since day one and my mind laughs at me over my feelings for her. Everyone blamed me for it all, even though we were both there. We could never really been the same though, 'cause she's always been too afraid to let loose.

I am the one who chose my path
I am the one who couldn't last

I feel the life pulled from me
I feel the anger changing me

I did choose my path, and I didn't have the strength to last as a Slayer. The anger and resentment I felt changed me too much. I recognized it all and never fully accepted the truth until I felt the coldness of death spreadin' through me.

Sometimes I can never tell
If I've got something after me

That's why I just beg and plead
For this curse to leave me

Tell me why I am to blame
Aren't we supposed to be the same?

That's why I will never tame
This thing that's burning in me

My fangs graze the flushed skin over B's artery and reflexively I bite down. I feel her jerk against me and I tighten my hold. The incredible rush of warmth floods me as her blood travels down my throat and I moan. I can't believe I begged for this cursed existence to end when this feels so fuckin' amazin'.

I am the one who chose my path
I am the one who couldn't last

I feel the life pulled from me
I feel the anger changing me

I force my fangs to retract and jerk away from B, startled at my thoughts. Oh, fuck. God, I can't— I bury my face against her skin and squeeze my eyes shut in horror.

Betrayed
I feel so enslaved

I really tried
I did my time

I did my time
I did my time
I did my time
I did my time

Why did she have to come to me for help? I did my time, paid my dues, whatever you want to call it. Really when it comes down to it, I did both. Prison and then death, both were really harsh punishments if you think about it.

I am the one who chose my path
I am the one who couldn't last

I feel the life pulled form me
I feel the anger changing me

I was doin' just fine 'til she came back. And goddamn it, I think I'm losin' control now. Somethin' ain't right, in any case 'cause I'm startin' to like this. I pull back and look in her eyes, surprised to see concern there. I see her flinch and I grin viciously as I lick the blood from my mouth.

Oh God, the anger's changing me

I pull her into a bruisin' kiss with the hand still tangled in her hair. She chokes back a cry when I force her mouth open with my tongue. I release her waist and grab her jaw with my other hand to hold her in place. It only takes a second for her to realize she's free and she punches me in the gut before she shoves me away.

I stumble back a step and laugh as I straighten. I look at her for a sec, admirin' my handy work. Her mouth's swollen and bruised, and her hair's tussled. Blood's smeared around her lips and a thin red line's tricklin' down her neck to stain her shirt.

I give her a wide grin, my dimples on display and step back into her space. I cup her cheek and trace my thumb over her jaw. Without warnin', I release her and bring my fist back to deliver an uppercut at full strength. She flies backwards and slams into a concrete support post, her head bouncin' off it before she slides down to the ground.

"Stay down," I snarl when she starts to get up.

I wait to make sure she's goin' to do what I say before my attention strays to a nearby vamp with four pets on leashes. He gives me an invitin' grin and I check out the little blonde he's got. Looks promisin' and they're gonna expect me to do it sometime anyway. I turn my back on B and walk toward the vamp as the song comes to an end.

Oh God, the anger's changing me

(Buffy's POV)

I didn't mean to get caught earlier. I was trying to get closer to where they were so I could get a better view of Faith. One of the guards must have sensed something, 'cause the next thing I knew ten vampires were coming at me. I dusted a few and did some damage to the rest before they stopped me.

I've been in an almost constant state of horrified shock since they dragged me in front of Joaquin. I think it was more the sight of seeing Faith's fangs grazing a Slayer's neck that affected me than anything else. I hope Leanne can get over what Faith was about to do to her, 'cause if anyone's going to kick her ass it's going to be me.

I can't describe the jumble of emotions that keep swamping me other than that initial jolt of complete rage and betrayal. I was so angry at her for doing that to me in front of all those people and I felt betrayed for reasons I don't care to examine just yet. I can't deny that having her touch me turned me on, but the time and the place was all wrong.

I'm not too sure I want to understand everything I'm feeling either because it's too much, too strong. Her behavior is scaring the Hell out of me, though. It seems to be getting worse the longer we're here too.

I'm trying not to think too much about everything that's happened so far. If I let my emotions take control, I'll blow everything. I can't let that happen. Not only 'cause I'm not ready to die again yet, but 'cause too much depends on this. I'd also like the chance to decide if I want to stake Faith or kiss her.

I rub the back of my head where a lump is beginning to form. It's throbbing painfully, but I ignore it as I force my eyes open. A gasp escapes me when I see Faith leading a small blonde away from a vamp. The look on Faith's face is disturbing, to say the least.

I'm standing before I can even think. I need to talk to her before she does anything she'll regret. I shove my way through the crowd until I'm right behind Faith. I grab her shoulder and jerk her around to face me.

I see her flinch and I'm probably the only one here who knows how much it took for her to not tear my head off. I've been in her body before and I recognize the tension rippling just beneath the surface. She's terrified, angry, and very much on edge. I have to be careful here or she won't be able to stop from shedding more blood here.

Not like she doesn't have enough of mine all ready. I shake off the images the thought provokes. I really don't want or need to go there right now.

"Didn't I tell you to fuckin' stay down?"

"Yes," I answer weakly.

She smirks, "Then why the fuck are ya buggin' me?"

"I just— I mean," I stammer to a halt and blow out an exasperated breath as I close my eyes briefly. When I reopen them, she has a smug look on her face. God, how I would love to slap it off.

I wince and force myself to choke out, "Please, I'm sorry. Just let me take her place, and I swear I won't cause any more trouble."

She leans closer to me and growls, "And how do I know you're tellin' the truth, Slayer?"

"You only have my word."

Her eyes flash yellow and then she snickers, "And what's to stop me from takin' you and then comin' back for her anyway?"

I clench my jaw and grind out, "I'll do whatever you want if you'll leave the others alone."

It's killing me to have to say these things to her. Yes, I have feelings for her. But that doesn't make it any easier for me to just hand control over to someone else. Since I've seen the others display that same problem, it has to be a Slayer thing.

Her gaze considers me and flicks to the small blonde for just a second before she turns to look at me. A kind of twisted grin forms on her face and I'm forced to suppress a shudder. I can't decide if it disgusts me or turns me on. It's just another thing I'm going to have to wait to think about.

"Aight," She rasps almost inaudibly as she drops the leash and steps into my personal space. "You got it, B. Now give us a kiss to seal the deal."

I have to force myself not to smirk as I step into the circle of her arms. She's just so predictable. I lean up to press my mouth to hers and my eyes flutter shut. Her lips are harsh and unrelenting as she claims my mouth and it's over quicker than I care for.

She chuckles quietly at the little whimper that escapes me and brushes the hair away from my neck. She starts to lower her mouth and I stop her with a hand in the middle of her chest. She looks up at me with an accusing look and I smile reassuringly.

"Not here, please?" I ask only loud enough for her to hear.

She looks like she's going to refuse for a moment before she finally rolls her eyes and sighs in exasperation. "Aight, we can go back to mine."

I kiss her again in gratitude. "Thank you."

"Whatever," She snarls as she turns to search for Joaquin.

Chapter Eleven: The Only One

(Faith's POV)

Joaquin reluctantly agreed to let me stay in my own place for now. He said he could sympathize with my bein' used to bein' alone. But I'll eventually have to move into the barracks when I've settled into the army. I can only hope we won't be here that long.

Damn, this has been one fucked up day. I just keep havin' to push what I'm feelin' away though, 'cause I'll get scared and fuck up if I don't. It's almost too much for me to handle. In a way I'm grateful B's here, 'cause I know she'll keep stoppin' me from fuckin' up big time like I almost did earlier with that girl.

It makes me sick that there's a part of me that's enjoyin' this. There's another part of me that doesn't care that it's happenin', though. And every time I do somethin' violent, those parts only get stronger. I'm feelin' kinda schizo with all this goin' on.

The walk home's given me time to think. It at least calmed me down even if it didn't help me make sense of anything.

I glance to my side where B's walkin' next to me. I don't know what I'm gonna tell her. Or even what I should tell her. She deserves to know everything, but would she be able to handle all of it? Am I even strong enough to talk about what I'm goin' through?

I've never been good at discussin' my problems, obviously. There have been a few times when I had no other choice but to spill, but even then it was almost impossible to get the words out.

We turn down the driveway to my dumpy little home away from home and step up onto the porch cautiously. The boards flex and creak under our weight and we hurry to get inside the house. I shut the door and motion for B to wait while I check the house. I step into the kitchen and let out a groan when I feel B followin' behind me.

I turn to face her and growl, "Why can't you do what the fuck you're supposed to, B?"

She crossed her arms over her chest and rolls her eyes. "I'm not just going to stand by and do nothing, Faith."

"Y'know, I think I'm startin' to understand why demons have it in for ya, B."

She opens her mouth to respond and then snaps it shut again. After a long time, she blows out an exasperated breath and shakes her head.

"We don't have time to fight this out right now, Faith. We need to figure out what we're going to do."

She sighs and adds quietly, "And eventually, we're going to have to have a talk about what happened."

I lower my eyes at that and my anger evaporates. My shoulders slump and I shrug as I turn back to the kitchen.

"After we make sure nobody's in here."

The house was empty, as I'd thought it would be. I just had to be sure first. Now we're sittin' on a pile of blankets with only a small battery operated lantern for light. She's sittin' opposite me and lookin' at me expectantly.

I roll my eyes and lean back against the wall. I don't know how to start this. My eyes fall on the now healing punctures and bruises on her throat beneath the collar. Oh wait, yeah I do.

"Why the fuck were you followin' me tonight?"

She tenses and tries to duck the responsibility, "This isn't about what I did."

"Oh yes it is," I laugh humorlessly. "I wouldn't have had to resort to any of this shit if you'd have kept your ass at home, B!"

"Oh, so it's my fault?" She replies defensively.

I see tears wellin' up in her eyes and groan. Shit, this is impossible.

"No," I growl. "It's not your fault. I'm the one who couldn't think of anything better."

Oddly enough, her shoulders slump and she brings her knees up to her chest. She wraps her arms around her legs and shakes her head.

"It's neither of ours' faults, Faith," She says so quietly I almost don't hear it. "I don't think I'd have done any better."

How can she say that after what I did? I fuckin' raped her in front of our enemy. It doesn't matter that she enjoyed it while it was happenin'. The fact still remains that she trusted me and I violated her—with an audience. And to make it worse, I enjoyed it.

I swallow hard, tryin' to ignore the swellin' in my clit at the memory. I reply huskily, "Sure ya would've, B. I just keep fuckin' up 'cause I'm losin' my fuckin' mind."

"What are you talking about?"

I wince and let my gaze drop to the blankets. I can't let her see how I'm really feelin'. She doesn't need to know right now anyway. She's gotta be able to trust me and she won't be able to if I tell her the truth.

"I don't know. I'm confused and more than a little disturbed right now, B. Playin' this part ain't any easier for me than it is for you."

"I guess you're right," She mutters wryly. "I'm not the one who had to drink someone's blood."

"Exactly," I reply deadpan.

Silence falls and my eyes drift back up. The collar around her throat catches my attention and I wince. I gesture at it.

"Why the fuck do you still got that thing on?"

"I hadn't really thought about it," She chuckles as she reaches up to take it off.

I see that she's strugglin' with the collar and I bite back a few choice words 'cause I know what's gonna come next. She looks up at me with her hands still fiddlin' with the buckles at the back of her neck and I clench my jaw in anticipation.

"Faith, can you give me a hand?"

I get up reluctantly and approach. I've been tryin' to keep my distance 'cause I don't know how I might react. That and I ain't in the mood for another of her punches tonight. My stomach still hurts like fuck from earlier.

"Lemme see it."

I bat her hands away and brush her hair over her shoulder and out of the way. I have to force my eyes not to stray to her exposed neck as I work the leather strap out of the buckles. The heat of her back soaks through my jeans and my hands shake almost unnoticeably. My breathin' sounds unnaturally loud in the silence of the room and I'm prayin' for the stupid fuckin' collar to give all ready.

"So do you have any idea of what we're going to do next?"

I jerk, startled by the sound of B's voice. The last buckle snaps open and I toss the collar to the side as I back up hurriedly. I lean back against the fireplace and let my gaze fall as she turns to face me.

"I have an idea, but ya ain't gonna like it."

I can feel her starin' at me but I can't meet her eyes. Ain't gonna like it is an understatement, she's gonna be pissed as Hell. But we've got a job to do and what we want doesn't mean shit right now. Too many lives are on the line for us to fuck up.

She lets out a breath and I hear the blankets rustle. Out of the corner of my eye I see her stand and come towards me. I tense and cross my arms over my chest.

She stops just an inch or so away from me and tries to catch my gaze. "Look at me, Faith."

I look up at her and bite my bottom lip. I shake my head and release it.

"What is it?" B asks warily.

I drop my arms and shove off from the fireplace. I walk around her and go to the other side of the room. I ignore her obvious confusion and the hurt in her eyes.

"We ain't doin' anybody any good, both of us bein' here."

"What's your point, Faith? It's not like we can do anything about it now."

"You can escape today. Get back to HQ and let 'em know what's goin' down."

I can see it ain't sittin' well with her in the immediate tensin' of her jaw. I ain't givin' in on this, though. I can't. There's too much at stake here.

I'll admit only to myself that I'm scared shitless that I'll snap as soon as she's not around but there are other things that worry me more. If I lose control with her here, she'll be my first target. I love her too much to take that chance. Not only that, but if it does happen, she'd be the only one with a chance of stoppin' me.

I'm also a little afraid that I'll fuck up and blow my cover. I'll be dusted faster than I can react if that happens and then it'll be open season on B. I can't let that happen.

"You can't be serious," She scoffs and her brows furrow.

She approaches me again and I bite back an annoyed growl. I force myself to stay where I am, though. She tends to strike back when she gets hurt.

"I am serious, B. This whole thing is ridin' on our shoulders. I'm the one who has to deal with Joaquin. When everything goes down, you're the only one who can lead our army into the battle."

She stops right in front of me and laughs humorlessly. "You know, I thought after Sunnydale I wouldn't have to deal with this any more. I'm not the only Slayer, Faith! They can handle this without me."

I close the short distance between us and lean forward, gettin' in her face. I snarl, "You're the only one who can do this! The rest of them got the power, but they ain't shit compared to either of us and you know it, B!"

"I'm not leaving," She growls as she shoves at my shoulders, forcin' me back a step.

"Yes – you – are," I answer coolly, tryin' to ignore my risin' anger.

Chapter Twelve: Lies We Tell Ourselves

"No, I'm not!"

She shoves me again and I slam into the wall. I try to move and she grabs my tank top, twistin' it in her fists as she pushes me back against the wall. We struggle, gruntin' in frustration and anger. She jerks her knee up into my groin and I groan at the pain.

I shake my head roughly and try to take a deep breath to calm down but it doesn't help. Countin' to ten doesn't help either.

Aight, that's it! There's only so much someone can put up with before it becomes too much. And I think she just shoved me right the fuck over the line.

I shift to game face and bring my arms up between hers, powerin' through her hold and forcin' her to let go. I shove her back away from me and jump up, kickin' away from the wall to flip over her head. I land and turn just as she comes runnin' at me.

I barely have time to plant my feet 'fore her shoulder slams into my gut and she rams me back against the fireplace. The mantle crumbles from the force of my head crashin' into it and a crack spreads up the wall in the bricks. A sharp ringin' fills my ears.

I waver in and out of consciousness, unable to push away the pain or find the breath that was knocked out of me. Small, deceptively strong hands cup my face and I'm brought back to reality to find B starin' at me, guilt and concern floodin' her expression.

I blink and try to jerk away from her, only to gasp at the jolt of pain that spreads across the back of my skull. I try to reach up to touch it and she smacks my hand away.

"I think you have a concussion. Don't move too much. It'll only make it hurt worse."

"Shit, B," I groan. "I get that you're pissed at me, but couldn't ya have found some other way to show it? I hate concussions."

"God, I'm so, so sorry," She chokes out. "I didn't mean for this to happen. I just got so angry and..." She trails off with a helpless shrug.

"It's just the same old song and dance then, huh?"

I get that I shouldn't be such a bitch. It shouldn't surprise me that we fought, either. I'm lucky it wasn't a lot worse, really. But, fuck, this hurts! I'm dizzy and kinda nauseous too so there's no way in fuckin' Hell I can be nice right now.

Her thumbs stroke my cheeks and her eyes search my face. Her eyebrows scrunch up and she sighs as she lets me go. She blinks and a tear trickles down her cheek.

"I—I can't, I mean, I d—don't..." She trails off with a pained look.

Shit, I can't let this go on. We'll be here all night if we keep beatin' ourselves up. I let out a frustrated breath and reach out, grabbin' her around the waist and pullin' her to me. She stiffens and I wrap both arms around her in a tight embrace.

I ain't too sure what to do here, but I'm gonna play it by ear. I rub her back gently with one hand and nuzzle my mouth against her hair 'til I reach her ear. I take a deep breath and the scent of her fills me, makin' me sigh.

"It's aight, B. We fight sometimes, that's just how we roll."

She relaxes and buries her face in my shoulder. Her voice comes out muffled, "It's not all right, Faith. How can we have a re—" She cuts herself off and shakes her head.

I gently palm the back of her head and prompt her, "Have a what, B?"

'Course I know what she was gonna say, but I really wanna hear her say it. I wanna hear her admit that there's somethin' happenin' between us. I wanna know how she really feels about it, too. I wanna know if it's as amazing to her as it is to me.

She lifts her head and I can tell by the look in her eyes I ain't gonna hear it tonight, though. I shrug and give her a sad, knowin' grin. I get it. Right now ain't the time to get into that and this definitely ain't the place I wanna have that discussion anyway.

I wanna lay on the charm thick when we finally get to that point. And this right here— a rundown house, torn and dirty, sweat soaked clothes? Nah, this shit ain't anywhere near what I consider romance.

She brings a hand up to my face again and gently trails a finger down my jaw. I know we need to discuss the plan, but I'm mesmerized by the look she's given me. It's soft and adorin', and there's this cute half-grin playin' at one corner of her mouth. I don't think I've ever seen her look at even soul-boy this way before.

She leans forward and I can't help but follow. Our mouths meet and my eyes flutter shut at the gentle pressure of her lips on mine. Our lips glide over each other's and she sucks my bottom lip into her mouth, nibbling it playfully.

Her hands find my hips and she pulls me closer. I tighten my hold on her and a moan rumbles in my chest as her tongue laps at my lip. She darts her tongue into my mouth and it twists around mine, makin' my mind create all kinds of images of what else she could do with it. I growl and the kiss suddenly changes, becomin' hard and needy.

She squirms against me, tryin' to get closer and I happily comply. I grab her thighs and hoist her up, lettin' her legs encircle my waist as her arms go about my neck. God, this gets so out of control with us so fuckin' fast. We fuck like we fight— full of passion and determination.

I stumble blindly to the blankets. My head wound ain't even registerin' anymore. The only thing that matters to me now is the blonde wildcat in my arms and the insistent grindin' of her blue jean covered pussy against my lower belly. The wet heat comin' off her and the heady scent of her arousal has both sets of my lips waterin'.

I drop to my knees and lay her back in the pile of blankets, coverin' her body with mine in one fluid motion. One of my hands is all ready grappling with her belt as the other is slidin' up her thigh. I pull the belt from her loops and reach for her fly. Firm hands cover mine, stoppin' my progress and I growl as B forces her mouth from mine.

She pants, "God, Faith. W—we have to stop."

I capture her lips again and murmur against the pliable flesh, "No we don't."

She turns her head away from me and whimpers. "Yes, we do."

I drop my head onto the blankets by hers and grumble, "Says who?"

"Faith," She says exasperatedly.

My shoulders slump and I roll off her onto my back. I get what she's sayin', and I believe it too, but I gotta wait for my body to stop hummin'. She snuggles up to me and I bite my lip as I try to keep from touchin' her. This really ain't helpin' me any.

"I don't want to leave you," She whispers.

I sigh as we're brought back to what started all of this. I push my hormones back for the time bein'. There'll be plenty of time for those later. Hopefully.

I kiss her forehead and let my head drop back onto the blankets. "B, you have to." I lick my bottom lip and savor her taste as I search for a plausible explanation.

Reluctantly, I consider everything that happened. Havin' her at my side comforted me, but it made me tense as Hell too. Maybe I can play it that way.

I blow out a breath. Only one way to find out.

"B, I can't keep my cover if you're still around. I hate what I've had to do to you, and it's only gonna get worse. It'll be safer for both of us if you go back to HQ."

(Buffy's POV)

As angry and confused as I am, I can't stand the idea of her being alone in that place. I hate the thought of leaving her with no one to watch her back. But I know she's right. As much as I hate leaving her alone, I hate the thought of being a liability even more.

Frustrated, I lift up onto my elbow and look down into her dark eyes. Finally, I close my eyes and let my shoulders slump.

"All right, I'll go."

Strong arms wrap around my shoulders and she pulls me on top of her. I bury my head into the crook of her neck and breathe in the scent of her as I struggle not to cry. A sob forces past the lump in my throat and she tightens her hold on me.

"I'll be aight. Don't cry," She whispers over and over in my ear. God, I hope that's true.

Chapter Thirteen: Dangerous Games

(Faith's POV)

B and I fell asleep in each other's arms after we were done discussin' our plans. We still have plenty to talk about, but the rest has to wait 'til we're done with this shit. I hate havin' to put it off, but I'm not really lookin' forward to it either. She has feelings for me, I know that now, but there's so much between us. Our past, the fact that I'm a vampire, all of it could serve to be the most effective clit blocker ever.

This mornin' was amazin' though. It was the first time I've ever held someone while they slept. I can still feel the phantom warmth of her pressed against me. It's goin' a long way to combat the chill comin' at me from Joaquin.

B snuck out while I was asleep, like we'd decided. That way I could tell him that she escaped while I was sleepin'. We figured that the closer to the truth we stayed, the less complicated things would get. We even set up a few things at the house to match my explanation—thing is, he ain't bein' too cooperative.

I ain't even got to explain it yet. I barely got out the words, "She escaped," 'fore he blew his top and told me to shut up. He sent me outside for a minute and then called me back in as one of his goons left. My guess is he sent that guy to go scope out the sitch and he's waitin' to see if I'm tellin' the truth 'fore he decides to dust me.

That was thirty minutes ago, though. I've just been standin' here in the middle of the warehouse with him sittin' in a chair at the head of the table. Two of his guys have their Jericho 941 Fs trained on me.

I'm surprised he didn't have 'em take mine off me. Then again, it ain't like he knows I could pull 'em 'fore his boys could pop off a shot. I ain't gonna tell him either. I like surprises.

Ah, here his guy comes. He crosses the room and drops the armful he brought with him on the table in front of Joaquin. He clears his throat.

"This is what I found at her place, boss."

Joaquin sifts through the pile of blankets and rope and then glances up at me. "Leave us. I'll send someone for you once we've finished."

I roll my eyes and leave. I can faintly make out the sounds of his lackey's harried voice as I let the heavy door slam behind me. I search through my jacket pockets 'til I find a pack of Marlboro Reds and I take out a cigarette and my lighter. I feel a distinct sense of pleasure as I take the first hit.

This is the first cigarette I've had since we arrived. I didn't wanna hear B bitchin' 'bout the smell, so I just left it 'til now. It ain't like I'm really addicted to it anymore. It's more a habit than anything.

I lean back against the wall and blow a perfect circle into the air. Right about now, Joaquin's probably found the blood on the blanket. I grimace.

We fought about that one. I didn't wanna have to hurt her anymore, but B said it would be more convincin' if there was some of her blood in the house too. Mine had all ready been spilled with my head wound. Then she told me I could either bite her, or she'd just find a knife to cut her hand with to get it done.

Unfortunately, it wasn't common sense that decided it. The vamp part of me took serious affront at the thought of her blood gettin' spilled by anything other than my fangs.

My grumblin' stomach reminds me that it's been six hours since I drank from her and I wince. I don't know how long I'll be able to go without takin' someone's blood. I haven't been able to go long since I finally gave in that first time all those years ago. I swore then that I'd never let myself get desperate enough to go after a rat again.

The door opens and I look up to see one of Joaquin's goons approachin' me. I give him a nod and move towards him.

"What's up?"

"Boss wants you to come back inside," He answers. "You better be prepared to answer his questions, bitch."

My eyes narrow and I slam my shoulder into his as I pass. "Call me bitch again and I'm gonna fuck you up, motherfucker."

I shove the door open and let it slam behind me again as I enter. I ignore the vamps waitin' on either side of the room. Guess they heard somethin' and wanted to see the show.

I stop in front of the chair opposite Joaquin's and put my hands on it as I lean forward. I lift an eyebrow at him.

"So what's the what?"

"Sit down," Joaquin waves towards the chair I'm leanin' on.

"That's aight. I think I'd rather stand."

"All right, have it your way then. But you will tell me exactly what happened when you left here."

I roll my shoulders. "That's what I've been tryin' to do since I got here."

"Then please, forgive my rudeness and do go on."

I smirk. "Aight, I ain't usually into the whole kiss and tell thing, but I'll make an exception for you." That's a lie, but he ain't gotta know it.

He nods. "I would very much appreciate it."

"I took her back to my crib. We fought, I fucked her and drank. Then I tied her up so I could get some sleep."

"All right," He drawls. "Then what happened? I'm really curious as to how she escaped from someone as skilled as you are."

"As surprisin' as it may be, I guess I just ain't as charmin' as I thought," I snicker. "She was gone when I woke up and the ropes had been sawed through. I didn't know there was broken glass in the corner I dumped her in."

"Ah, I see."

His next comment is interrupted by the growlin' of my stomach. I smile sheepishly and shrug at him.

"It's been a few. I came here immediately after realizin' what had happened."

He tilts his head and studies me curiously. After a long, tense second, he smirks and waves to one of his goons.

"Loyalty such as that deserves a reward," He muses. "Bring my friend here one of our broken pets."

I jerk my gaze back to Joaquin's as his goon leaves the room. I really don't like the sound of that.

"Broken pets? Who are they?"

"They are Slayers who've been bled so often that they have neither the energy nor the willpower to present any real challenge."

My stomach drops at that and I struggle to keep my reaction from showin'. Couldn't he have just brought me one of the humans? Why is this motherfucker determined to feed me a fuckin' Slayer?

Thing is, that dark part of me that has me frightened out my fuckin' mind? It's thrilled. The buzz of exhilaration builds in my gut, makin' a twisted grin spread across my lips. I close my eyes briefly as my face contorts into game form. When I open my eyes, I look directly at Joaquin.

"Thank you."

The energy fillin' me increases at the familiar signals my body sends up my spine. I stand as the door swings open and Joaquin's goon comes back in, pullin' a tiny brunette in after him by her leash. I clench my hands in anticipation and meet them halfway.

This is gonna be fuckin' wicked. I jerk the leash away from the goon and pull the Slayer to me as I turn us to face Joaquin. I pause, my eyes searchin' her pale, drawn profile. Her gaze stays on the floor, her entire body screamin' resignation.

I grab her hair in my fist, forcin' her head to the side and exposin' her throat. I study the bruised, scarred flesh impassively. Dark, purple bruises overlap faded yellow ones and slowly healin' bite marks cover scars of old. I smirk.

"You're pathetic," I hiss. "A stronger Slayer would kill herself before lettin' some vamp turn her into his bitch."

She doesn't look at me, but I can see the sudden tension that fills her. Her body almost vibrates with it. I look up at Joaquin.

"What exactly do ya want me to do with her?"

"Drain her."

Gladly, I muse distantly. I laugh darkly as I lunge for her throat. My fangs tear into the soft, supple flesh and I hear her cry out faintly. I wrap my free arm around her waist, pinnin' her writhin' body to mine.

Oh fuck, it's good. So different than B's, but still one of the most exotic things I've ever tasted. Her fear and anger makes it that much better. This could become addictive.

My eyes drift open and I find Joaquin's dark eyes watchin' expectantly, his game face showin'. I know what he wants.

Give it to him, my mind whispers. Bleed her dry.

Oh, I will. I chuckle inwardly as somethin' inside snaps. This is what I am.

As her struggles lessen, the voice in my head screamin' for me to stop grows faint. All the reasons why I shouldn't do this drift away 'til the hot rush of her blood and the warmth fillin' me are all I know. I can hear her heartbeat slowin' and then it's silent. I tear my mouth away, shreddin' her skin as my fangs retract. I let her body fall to the floor.

I glance down at her corpse dispassionately and then let my eyes lift to find Joaquin starin' at me in surprise. I smile broadly, the blood in my mouth makin' it grotesque.

"Any other fun reindeer games ya wanna play?"

Chapter Fourteen: Let the Games Begin

Joaquin clears his throat and forces his face back to human form. "Ah, no, no, that was all, Troy."

"Good to know," I answer coolly.

He gestures another of his goons forward. This guy is one big son of a bitch. His muscles strain against the tight black muscle shirt and he towers over everyone else. His skin is so dark, it's almost midnight black and he moves with fluidity I didn't expect from someone his size.

"Remove the Slayer's body, Dionne," Joaquin rumbles.

He grunts in answer and pushes his way past the people standin' in his way. He crouches down in front of me and hoists the Slayer up onto his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. He nods at me and then leaves.

I lift an eyebrow. "Interestin' help ya got here."

He grins. "Isn't it though?"

I pull the seat opposite him out and turn it around, straddlin' it. I prop my arms on the back of it and sigh.

"So, how much trouble am I in for losin' the Slayer?"

He rubs his jaw and then shrugs. "Capturing her was simply a bonus, so her escape really doesn't make much of a difference. While I'm not happy that she now knows where our base is located, it changes nothing. I doubt she's stupid enough to try to bring her girls in here."

He stands and moves around the table 'til he's at my side. He leans his hip against the corner of the table.

"There are far too many of us, really."

"Out of curiosity, just how many soldiers do we have?"

"Six hundred," He answers with a wide grin. "The majority of us are vampires, but we are slowly recruiting a few demons here and there. We even have a couple of humans to do our daylight business."

"How'd ya get a human to agree to do anything for us?"

"They are simply pets who enjoy the bite. The promise of turning them keeps them loyal," He laughs.

I smirk. "Yeah, I bet."

He tilts his head and considers me. "So what would it take to keep you loyal, Troy?"

A bossy little blonde Slayer, I force myself not to smirk at the thought. I shrug instead.

"I hate followin' orders," I scowl. "Other than that, I don't got a reason not to be loyal. I get a boss who likes to give me gifts, cool toys, a place to crash."

He laughs. "I think we can make some arrangements to accommodate you. How would you like to be in charge of your own unit? The only person you would take orders from would be me."

"I don't know. What's in it for me?"

His game face contorts his features and he grins. "A front row seat when everything goes down and as much fun as you can handle in the meantime. You get second pick of anything that comes through here."

I lift a lazy eyebrow. "Meanin' what?"

"Meaning that you get the best of the toys, the pets," He leers, "And anything else you desire."

I shift to game face and purr, "Really now?"

He leans closer. "You could even have me if it helps your decision any."

I lick my lips and his gaze trails my tongue. Oh, this fucker is as good as mine.

"Sounds promisin'," I breathe.

The cemetery's empty when I get there, but I can feel her. It doesn't take me long to pinpoint the mausoleum she's in. I pause with my hand on the door and stiffen when my eyes confirm what my senses are screamin'. The shadows near the entrance would hide him from anyone's sight but a Slayer.

I watch him for a minute and then sneak around the side of the mausoleum. I slip between two trees and press up against one, silently pullin' my dagger from the sheath on my belt. I don't have long to wait 'fore I hear the faint rustle of leaves and gravel.

I've had a hell of a time gettin' away from Joaquin the past few days. Tonight's been the first time I've been able to slip away. He's found plenty of excuses to keep me close and I've been kinda encouragin' it in the hopes that it would get us better info. I hope to God what I learned is helpful.

Fuck, I hope I can get this over with 'fore I have to actually let him touch me. I don't know if I'll be able to put him off much longer without raisin' his suspicions further than they all ready are. He hasn't done it since, but I kinda realized that Slayer he had me drain was a test. He doesn't trust me any more than I trust him.

The vamp that's been trailin' me comes around the side of the mausoleum and I grab him. I slam him back against the tree and stab my dagger through his shoulder, pinnin' him to the tree. I slap a hand over his mouth to silence his scream.

I snarl, "You alone?"

He nods rapidly and I smirk. "Why don't I believe ya?"

His eyes widen and he tries to speak. His voice is muffled and he rolls his eyes in irritation.

"You gonna stay quiet, fucker?" He nods again. "Do anything to alert anyone and I'll treat you to a torture session worse than anything you could imagine."

I move my hand and grip the dagger's hilt. I twist it a little to make my point.

He clamps his jaw shut to keep from screamin'. I let my hand rest on the hilt and lift an impatient eyebrow at him.

"My orders were to keep an eye on you and call in every half hour to report. I don't know why, I swear," He chokes out.

I snicker and reach inside my jacket to retrieve my stake. It finds a new home in his chest 'fore he can protest and I catch my dagger, returnin' it to the sheath as I step back out into the open. I tuck the stake back inside my jacket and wipe his ashes from the black leather pants and the dark red silk shirt Joaquin gave me today. I pause in front of the mausoleum and look around once more before I let myself in.

I find Buffy leanin' against a stone pillar in the outer chamber of the mausoleum. Our eyes meet as I saunter across the room. I don't stop walkin' 'til our bodies brush against each other. I lean towards her and pause with our mouths a breath apart, waitin'.

She cups the back of my head and pulls me into a fierce kiss. I grasp her hips and pull her tight against me. Fuck, I missed her more than I knew. I slip my tongue into her mouth and her moan makes my pussy clench.

B pulls back and puts a hand on the center of my upper chest to keep me from followin'. She shakes her head at me.

"We don't have time for this, Faith."

My lower lip juts out and I mumble, "Hate you, B."

"Uh-huh, I hate you too," She giggles.

Our eyes meet again and goofy smiles sprout. We stand there silently for a minute, just baskin' in each other's presence. I wouldn't admit to anyone that I did this, though. I got a rep to protect, y'know?

"Can you give me a report of what's happened the past few days? I need something to take back to our ever curious Giles."

The question causes the smile to slide off my face. I blow out a breath and turn away from her. I study the stone wall in front of me.

"He was seriously pissed when I first told him that you were gone. He had one of his guys go check it out. Then he put me through one of his little tests."

"What kind of test?" B asks after a few moments of silence.

I turn back around to face her and I consider her for a long span of time. Then I tell her, carefully keepin' my voice void of any emotion.

"They hold the captured Slayers as pets for a while before they use 'em in initiations. Thing is, some of the Slayers become broken. They lose the will fight and they're no longer useful, so he gives 'em to his lieutenants to drain."

"What?" She asks sharply.

B's face darkens and she grabs the lapels of my jacket, jerkin' me closer as she leans up to get in my face. She studies my eyes for a moment and then abject sorrow floods her expression. She shakes her head.

"No, Faith. Tell me you didn't."

"I did what I had to," I answer her flatly and jerk out of her grasp.

"You took someone's life, Faith!" She chokes out. "How can you just stand there and act like it doesn't matter?"

I laugh bitterly. "Whatever it takes, right, B? Least that's what you said before."

"T—that was..." She trails off and her face crumples as tears leak from her eyes.

"That was 'fore ya knew just how much of the demon I really am," I finish for her with a sardonic grin and turn to leave.

Chapter Fifteen: Gotta Have Faith

(Buffy's POV)

Incredulously, I watch as she turns away from me. I knew she might have to do things like that, but having it actually happen is something else entirely. I hate this so much. It reminds me too much of what happened when we killed Finch.

I never should have let her convince me that she'd be better off if I left. It seems to me that she's in more danger now than ever. I blow out a breath and shake my head. I don't have time for this.

"Faith, wait," I call out. "We're not finished, yet."

She pauses with her hand on the door handle. "Yeah, we are, B."

"I need the rest of your report."

She turns to look at me and snorts. She crosses her arms over her chest and leans back against the door.

"I've been gettin' close to him like Giles asked me to. I've learned a few things, but nothin' too helpful. I need a few more days."

I force my mind to move past her first statement. I can't dwell on just how close she might be getting with him. Jealousy is no one's friend.

"What have you learned so far?"

She shrugs. "He's gatherin' troops right now. He's got around 600 at this point. They've got some humans on their side and a few demons too. Most of his people are vamps though."

"Oh," I mutter.

Damn, that doesn't sound promising for us. I think it might help that there are mostly vampires on his side. It gives us at least one edge over them. It disturbs me that that creep has humans helping him though.

"Can I go now? It's gettin' kinda late," She interrupts my thoughts anxiously.

"Yeah, Faith," I answer slowly. "But we really need to consider getting you out of there."

"Whatever."

I watch her leave and then I let out a shuddering breath. It takes every ounce of strength I have not to start crying. There will be plenty of time for that later when I'm alone in my room. Right now, I need to go talk to Giles.

"Oh dear lord," Giles mutters.

"Will you stop saying that?" I ask sharply.

"I'm sorry, Buffy. I'm just a little worried," He snaps.

"Could you at least tell me why?"

He tosses the notebook he was writing in onto the desk. "From your description of her behavior, it seems that we may very well have given Joaquin the weapon he needs to defeat us."

"No!" I shout. "She'll come through for us. You have no idea what it's like in there for her!"

"We've heard all we needed to, Buffy," Angel interrupts. "She's letting her demons take control."

"She can regain control," I choke out. "She just needs a little time."

I can't accept what they're saying. I understand that she's having trouble right now, but there has to be something we can do. We've been through so much and now that we're finally getting past everything, this is it? No, she's stronger than that.

"Buffy—"

"Please," I beg, cutting Will's sentence off. "There has to be a chance."

Giles clears his throat uncomfortably. I look at him and he takes his glasses off as he starts to speak.

"There is one, but it depends entirely on Faith."

"What is it?"

I hate that I sound so desperate, but I am. I want to explore what I'm feeling, what she feels, everything her eyes have promised and the things her hands have hinted at. I won't be able to do that if I have to stake her. That's kind of a relationship breaker.

"She would have to go into a meditative state to allow her mind to slip onto another plane of existence where the vampire and the slayer will be able to fight for control. The outcome can go either way."

"How do we get her to do that? Is it some kind of spell?"

"No," He answers simply. "In this type of possession, the host and the spirit have to have a companionable relationship for it to work. If not, then the antagonism will eventually force a confrontation between the two.

"In Faith's situation, the vampire is now the host. The Slayer demon is the spirit. The confrontations will only ever be able to temporarily cage the vampire if the Slayer wins."

His gaze drops. "However, if the vampire wins, the demon's spirit will leave and Faith will be unreachable. It's all in Faith's hands now."

I nod slowly and stand. "Is there anything else you need from me?" I choke out.

"I just have one more question. When will the two of you be meeting again?"

I run my hand through my hair and answer absently, "We decided on every three days instead of the original every other day meetings."

I leave the room without waiting to see if there's anything else. I can't take anymore tonight. As I reach third step on the stairs, I hear the door open and shut behind me. I sigh and let my steps falter.

"Wait, Buffy," Willow calls out.

I turn and look at her. "I can't deal with this tonight, Will. I need some time to myself."

She stops at the foot of the stairs and looks up at me in concern. "You haven't told us everything have you?"

I sigh again and drop my gaze. I hadn't wanted them to know that Faith did more than drink from me. I didn't think they needed to know the personal bits yet. But lying to her now won't do any good.

"No, but it doesn't have anything to do with the mission."

"I'm not asking as a member of the council, Buffy," Willow answers, hurt. "I'm asking as your best friend."

I lift my eyes and smile sadly. "I know, Will. And I swear to you, I'll tell you once this is over. But I can't afford to think about the personal stuff right now."

"I'll hold you to that," Willow answers.

"I know."

"Go on to bed, Buff," She jerks her head towards the upstairs. "I'll be here if you change your mind."

I'm almost at the top of the stairs when she calls my name again. I turn to look down at her.

"Yeah, Will?"

"If it helps any, I think Faith's strong enough to beat the odds. She's done it before," My redheaded friend says earnestly.

"Maybe," I reply.

"You just gotta have Faith," She adds with a smirk.

"Oh, God," I gasp through my laughter.

That was so Faith-like that I can't help but laugh. It feels so good to find something funny tonight, too. It won't last for long, but for now I'll enjoy it.

My body still tingling from the release I just found at my own hands, I collapse back onto the mattress. I curl into a ball and bury my face into the pillow. I squeeze my eyes shut and silent tears soak the soft, cotton fabric.

I long for those few short hours I had in Faith's arms. Her strength was more of a comfort to me than anything I've ever experienced. I just wish it had been longer.

More to the point, I wish she was here with me now. I need her to reassure me that she's going to be all right again. Maybe Will's right, though. I just gotta have Faith—in more ways than one.

Chapter Sixteen: Blood on My Hands

(Faith's POV)

I look around the alley at the group of vamps waitin' for my orders. Joaquin let me pick 'em all myself, 'cept that big dude Dionne. He arranged for him to be in my unit for a while to show me the ropes. At least, that's the reason he gave.

I think he just wanted someone to keep an eye on me. He ain't asked, but I think he knows I dusted that vamp in the cemetery yesterday. Or he suspects it anyway.

Tonight he sent us on a raid. I think it's just another test 'cause he didn't give any specifics on what to get. He just told me to take my unit and loot a local pawnshop. He said I could get first dibs on whatever we brought back since this is my first raid.

I gesture for my group to back up and I approach the backdoor. I'm happy to find that it's a flimsy lock. It doesn't take long for me to jimmy the lock and ease the door open.

Dionne slips around me and rips the alarm out of the wall, wires and all, 'fore it can go off. I look at him sharply and he shrugs.

"It'll give us a little time. Not much, but more than it would if it had gone off and a neighbor called the cops."

I snort and wave the rest of 'em ahead of me. "Grab anything that looks valuable. That means weapons, jewelry, and cash. We ain't got time for electronics so don't even think about it."

Dionne nods. "That's a good idea this time around. When we leave we need to split up and meet at the warehouse, though. Is that aight with you, Troy?"

"Yeah, we can do that," I mutter.

I ease into the shop and let the door swing shut behind me. I stand back and watch 'em for a while to make sure everyone's doin' what they're supposed to. Satisfied, I walk to the front of the shop where a few of the display cases are at.

I punch the display case, shatterin' the glass. I reach in and retrieve the silver sheathed knife that had caught my attention. I draw the blade and trace the twin grooves down the center with a negligent finger. My inspection is interrupted by the sound of someone callin' my name.

I return the blade to the sheath and slip it inside my jacket. That one, I'm takin' with me. I walk over to the tall, skinny vamp who called for me.

"What's up, Ty?"

He lifts his find for me to see and I grin. A tray of gold jewelry winks at me in the dim light shinin' in through the barred windows. I nod at him.

"Yeah, grab those."

Another voice calls for me and I look around 'til I find the culprit. I catch sight of what's caught her attention and shake my head in exasperation as I stroll over to her. She's the only female vamp on my team. The rest I picked for their strength, her I picked 'cause I'd thought she'd make a capable second in command.

I was obviously very, very wrong. I smack the remote out of her hand and snarl, "What didn't ya understand in my instructions? I said not to think about the electronics, Liz."

"But this stereo's really—"

I clamp a hand around her throat and shake her. I ignore the hands clutchin' at my arm and pull her face to mine.

"Forget the fuckin' stereo. If you can't follow simple fuckin' instructions, I'm gonna fix it so you ain't a problem for me anymore, got it?"

She nods as best she can. "Yeah, I got it," She chokes out.

I let her drop and turn away in disgust. "Go help Ty clear out the display cases."

She scrambles to her feet and hurries around me. I shake my head and return to the display cases I was searchin' earlier. Nothin' else really catches my attention, so I just grab a bunch of the knives and slip 'em inside my jacket.

I've just moved to one of the other sets of cases when a flash of lights outside the storefront window catches my eyes. My lip curls into a sneer and I wave at the others.

"Let's motor 'fore that cop makes the circuit and sees that the lock's been popped."

I'm surprised when they simply follow the orders. No one's rushin' to do anything as we leave. They just stuff whatever's in their hands in the bags they're carryin' as they go out the backdoor. Dionne's the last of my unit to leave and I slip out behind him.

Dionne gestures for us to hang back as he creeps to the mouth of the alley. I watch him peak 'round the brick buildin' and then he waves me forward. I stop at his side and clasp his shoulder.

"What's up?" The question's barely audible.

"I think we can sneak 'em out one at a time. The pig's fuckin' someone in his backseat."

I stifle a chuckle. "Aight, do that. Tell 'em to meet us back at the warehouse, too."

I move back and shove Ty forward. I watch Dionne give him his instructions and then Ty disappears around the corner. A couple of minutes later, he waves for another one and I shove someone else forward. I make a mental note of who it was and wait.

When the other four are gone, I shove Liz forward at Dionne's signal. When Liz is gone, Dionne gestures me forward and I approach him again.

"You go on, D. I'll wait to make sure the coast is clear, aight?"

He looks at me. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, go on."

He nods and waits a couple minutes 'fore he edges around the corner of the buildin'. Barely a minute passes 'fore I hear a door open. I ease forward and look to the front of the shop where the cop's car's parked. A low snarl escapes at what I see and I feel sick.

The cruiser's back passenger door's open, lettin' the interior light illuminate the scene. A young girl, maybe thirteen or fourteen, is leanin' against the side of the black and white car. This big brute of a pig's pawin' at her and kissin' her.

I clench my fists and force myself back into the alley. My nails dig into my palms as I struggle to stay calm. Frustrated, I slam my fist into the trashcan beside me. I tense at the loud clatter of the can hittin' the cement and rollin' towards the back of the alley.

I strain my ears to hear what's goin' on. A surge of excitement takes me by surprise and my face morphs. The footsteps come closer and I slip further into the shadows between two dumpsters as I wait.

His shadow stretches the length of the alley and the beam from his flashlight dances across the cement just inches from where I'm crouchin'. He slows to a stop in front of where I'm hidin' and looks around in confusion.

"What the Hell—"

I straighten and lunge for him. The flashlight hits the ground and shatters as my hand claps over his mouth, cuttin' off his startled scream. I pull one of his arms behind his back and jerk it upwards, pullin' his shoulder out of joint. I slam him into the wall face-first and pull his uninjured arm up just enough to keep him from strugglin'.

I hiss, "Stupid pig, ya should've stayed where ya were."

He groans and tries to wiggle away from me only to let out a high pitched squeal as I slam my knee up between his legs from behind. I take a moment to appreciate the fact that I've never heard a man hit that pitch before. Then I chuckle humorlessly.

"Do y'know what we used to do to sick fucks like you back in Southie?"

He shakes his head. I let go of his mouth to rip his radio mic off his shoulder and toss it aside. I grab his neck and smash his face into the bricks.

"We'd get 'em alone in the alley and the boys would gangbang 'em, then they'd cut the guy's dick off and let him bleed out."

"Oh, God, please don't," He chokes out. "Please don't."

"I ain't God," I laugh harshly and shake my head. "And somehow... I really don't think he's listenin' to you anymore."

I kick his legs out from under him and shove him onto his back on the cement. I give him the chance to see my face 'fore I move. His eyes widen and he freezes.

"Oh shit. What the fuck are you?"

I retrieve my new knife from my jacket and give him a wide grin, lettin' my dimples wink at him. "I'm the newest big bad, baby."

Not wantin' to delay my own gratification any longer, I straddle his chest and pin him to the ground. I toss the knife sheath to the ground by his head and study the blade curiously. I look down at him.

"You gonna be good for me or am I gonna have to get rough?"

He nods and chokes out, "Y—yeah, I—I'll be g—good."

I grin and twist at the waist, lettin' the knife spin through my fingers. I stop with the point down and smirk as my hand darts forward. The blade slices through the fabric at his groin as I clamp my legs tight around his torso and then I let the downward motion carry the blade through flesh to the cement. His body jerks violently in response to the pain shootin' through his lower half as he screams.

I ride out the motions of his agony by the strength in my legs. It doesn't take long 'fore it overwhelms him and he stills, his screams silenced by unconsciousness. My shoulders slump in disappointment and then I smirk as I glance down into his pale face.

I tear his shirt collar away and lower my mouth to his neck. My fangs tear through his skin to let the blood flow freely down my throat. The taste is so much weaker than a Slayer's, I muse in disappointment as I feast. It lacks the burn.

His heartbeat fades and then stops. I let him go and retrieve my knife before I stand. I wipe the blade off on his shirt and return it to the sheath. I look down at him again.

The vague disquiet I've felt since that first kill has all but disappeared. In its' place is an overpowerin' sense of satisfaction and hunger. I roll my shoulders and leave. The kid's gone when I step out into the open and I try to ignore the pang of disappointment.

Chapter Seventeen: Some Like It Hot

The walk back to the warehouse returned some semblance of normalcy to my thoughts. It also gave my hormones time to kick in. I'm disgusted at my reaction to what just happened. It wasn't even like this when I killed Professor Wirth.

Each step is agony as it puts pressure against my center. My clit's throbbin' with every breath I take and my body's beggin' for some action. The need to fuck or fight's gettin' stronger and I can feel the vibration of tension just beneath my skin.

I thought about goin' to a club to let off some steam but it ain't happenin'. My recent loss of control made me realize I need to stay away from humans as much as I can 'til I figure somethin' out. I ain't about to cry over that pig bastard, but it ain't somethin' I wanna risk a repeat of.

I nod at the guard at the gate and he lets me inside. I walk across the lot to the warehouse and enter. I'm immediately surrounded by two of the youngest members of my unit. Their excited chatterin' sets my nerves on end and I snap.

"Jesus, just shut the fuck up!"

Their eyes widen and silence prevails. I give the older one a derisive smile.

"Thank you! I get that tonight was the first time ya went on a raid, but now ain't the time to harass me." I turn my attention to the other one and roll my eyes. "Kid, just put ya fuckin' loot in the damn provisions cage and it'll get sorted out eventually."

Dionne shoves past a few vamps and nods at me. "Sorry about that. I told him to do it earlier. Guess he was just too excited to listen."

I push the kid in the direction of the cage and turn my attention back to Dionne. "Everyone get back aight?"

"Yeah," He nods.

"Good. I'm gonna dump my stuff in the cage and then head out."

A hand on my arm stops me from goin' and I turn to glare at him. He holds up a hand to placate me.

"Don't dust the messenger. I just wanted to tell you that I talked to Joaquin after we got back. He said to send you up to the fourth before you leave."

"Aight," I mutter and then I make my way over to the provisions cage.

I pull out the knives I retrieved from the display case at the pawnshop and toss 'em in the open cage. I pull out the one I used on the cop and sigh regretfully. I toss it in, too. As nice as the knife is, that ain't somethin' I wanna hang onto.

I head to the stairs. I've been curious about the fourth floor since he gave me and B our tour. I wonder what made him decide to let me in on the secret.

As I near the top of the stairs, the scent of incense hits me. It's strong and it makes my stomach queasy. I force myself to continue and the guard at the top of the stairs moves aside to let me pass. A strange vamp I ain't seen yet is waitin' for me at the landin'.

"Follow me, please. Joaquin waits for you in his quarters."

"Yeah, yeah," I mutter in annoyance.

In all truth, I ain't sure if it's the news he gave me or his chipper tone that has me irritated. I glance around as I reluctantly follow him to the sectioned off area to the right. Tables I'm guessin' to be lab stations fill the center of the room. Books, beakers, tubes, and unrecognizable items clutter the tops of the tables.

A few bookshelves line the back walls and another sectioned off area is to the left. Several vampires and a couple of humans are workin' at various projects. My guide's voice draws my attention away from the workers.

"Here we are," He says as he knocks on the door.

I stop behind him and cross my arms over my chest. A muffled command filters through the door and he opens it, gesturin' for me to go inside. I step around him and tense when the door closes behind me. I lift my gaze and take in the room.

It's a simple bedroom. A dark red rug covers the floor and a king size bed is tucked against the far wall. There's a dresser in one corner and a desk to my right. Joaquin is leanin' against the desk and there's an older vamp sittin' in one of the guest chairs in front of the desk.

"There you are, Troy. I hear the raid was successful."

"Yeah, it was."

The old vamp stands and turns to look at me. I can feel the power comin' off him almost as strong as Red's and I tense in response to the unseen threat. He clears his throat and grins.

"Aren't you going to introduce me to your lovely companion here, Joaquin?"

"Ah yes," He grins. "Aiden, this is my newest recruit, Troy. Troy, this is my trusted warlock and friend, Aiden."

"I'm pleased to meet you," Aiden says as he reaches for my hand.

"Uh-huh," I drawl as my gaze takes in his hand and then lifts to his. I arch an eyebrow.

He chuckles and withdraws his hand. He glances at Joaquin with a smirk.

"She's a spirited one."

"Yes she is," Joaquin replies proudly.

It takes everything I got to keep from smackin' the hell outta him. This isn't the best time for me to be here. Fuck, I gotta get outta here 'fore I do somethin' stupid.

I clear my throat. "So Dionne said you wanted to see me?"

He gives me a grin I'm sure he thinks is charmin'. In reality it just comes off as arrogant and pisses me off even more. I shove my hands into my pockets and ball 'em up, diggin' my nails into my palms. The skin breaks where I left crescent marks back in the alley but the pain helps me regain a little control.

"Ah, yes." He turns to Aiden. "We'll take this up tomorrow. I have some unfinished business with Troy."

Lust flares red hot in my gut at the promise in his tone. He's a bastard, but he's hot and my body can't help but respond when he's offerin' the release I need. I've always been a slave to my urges and this time ain't provin' any different.

"All right then," The older vamp responds as he walks past me. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Troy. Hopefully we'll have more time to talk soon."

"Yeah, sure," I mutter as Aiden closes the door behind him.

Joaquin walks over to me with an even, rollin' stride. His hand lifts to trace my jaw and a shiver races up my spine. His gaze catches mine and he gives me a smile.

"You hunger for more?"

He cups my cheek and my eyes flutter shut as I answer almost inaudibly, "Yes."

His hand drifts down to my neck and his thumb rubs my throat. His blunt nails drag across my skin and I moan. I feel hot breath brush across my check.

"Your body yearns to be caressed, doesn't it?" He whispers in my ear.

His body presses into mine and I lean into the contact. This isn't right, my mind screams. He's not the one I want.

"You crave that brief flare of life that rushes through you with release," He continues.

An image of B's face, flush with desire enters my mind. She's the one I want, I whisper internally. Another one drifts to the surface. The image of her eyes floodin' with tears and her face darkened with anger sends a rush of primal agony through me. I bite back a cry and pull Joaquin to me, bringin' our mouths together with bruisin' force.

B won't ever be mine. I killed any chance we had when I drained that fuckin' pig tonight. I'll be lucky to even be able to call her a friend when this is all over with.

I shove Joaquin back 'til his knees hit the bed and we fall back onto it. I straddle his hips and pin him down to keep him from tryin' to get on top. I shake my hair out of my face and sneer at him.

"I don't sub for anyone," I hiss and then I kiss him hard and wet.

Chapter Eighteen: The Girl in the Mirror

I can't sleep 'cause my body's still hummin' with tension. I came when I fucked Joaquin, but it didn't give me the release I needed. Good sex usually cleans my clock, lets my mind go blank for a while, but not tonight. My memories keep playin' over and over and won't give me any rest.

He wasn't happy when I got up to leave earlier, but I told him that I just don't do overnights. I left for home 'fore he could make any more noise about it, thinkin' B's the only one I wanna curl up with. Now I'm here, lyin' in my pile of blankets and her scent's all around me. I can still smell a hint of her arousal in the air and it's drivin' me nuts.

"Fuck," I groan.

Maybe meditation will help me relax enough to get to sleep. I blow out a harsh breath and close my eyes. I let my breathin' slip into an even, rhythmic cadence as I search for that spot in my mind that's completely silent. I scrunch my face up in concentration and then I growl in frustration.

I open my eyes and scramble into a sittin' position against the wall. I fold my legs into a yoga style and prop my forearms on my thighs as I lean back against the wall. I let my eyes shut and even out my breathin' once again. A loud silence suddenly cuts through the racin' thoughts that have plagued me all night and tension drains from me.

I float in that peaceful existence. A faint smile creases my lips and a fuzzy lassitude fills me. Slowly I drift off into familiar dreams in the early mornin' hours.

I know somethin' ain't right as soon as I open my eyes. This definitely ain't my house. I'm surrounded by stone walls and the floor is covered with fine grains of red sand. My brows furrow in confusion and I force my gaze to move. Opposite the wall where I'm chained are two tunnels, a bright light shines from one and the other is dark as pitch with hungry flames lickin' at the openin'.

I try to move and the rattle of metal against metal alerts me to the fact that I'm bound. I pull, only to find that the chains are bolted to the wall. I tug with full strength and the metal doesn't even creak in protest. I try again and nearly lose my balance in the shiftin' sand beneath my bare feet.

I take a deep breath and slump back against the chilled stone. I stiffen and look down at my naked body. This can't be good. Fuck.

Usually when someone goes as far as to strip a Slayer and chain her up, they mean business. I don't know how I got in here, but I gotta get out 'fore whoever did this comes back. I ain't ever been a fan of bein' on the opposite end of the torture session.

Fuck, what if Joaquin figured me out? He could've had that fuckin' warlock of his work some kind of mojo when we were in his room earlier. I'm fucked if that's what this is. I struggle with the chains again, wrappin' 'em around my fists and pullin' with all my strength.

A sound reaches my ears and I freeze. I strain my ears to try to catch it again. It comes a few seconds later and the hair on the back of my neck stands on end. I've sharpened a lot of blades and steel on rock is one of the most distinctive sounds I've ever heard.

The shrill scream of metal against rock echoes in the cave for a long span of time and the poundin' of two sets of feet on the sandy ground signals someone's fast approach. A dark blur bursts forth from the lit tunnel and slides across the sand to come to a stop on her knees in front of me. The dark wavy head of hair starts to lift and my world shifts on end.

The cave falls silent for a long moment as my eyes lock with a set of pure black ones. I shake my head and shift my gaze to take in her face.

"This ain't possible." I utter the words without thought.

Flames flare from torches that have suddenly appeared in sconces on the walls. The light dances across her lithe form and sends shadows dancin' over her white tank top as she stands in one fluid motion. She gives me a feral smile and laughs as she dusts the sand from her ripped up jeans.

"Oh, but it is, little girl," She replies in a gravelly voice that reminds me of all-night benders. Y'know, the kind where ya drink whiskey and smoke 'til ya can't see straight?

As impossible as it seems, I know who I'm lookin' at. She holds herself with a predatory grace that's as familiar as my own skin. A dangerous energy radiates off of her that puts me on edge. She is the Slayer.

The scream of metal comes to a sudden halt and our heads jerk in the direction of the dark tunnel in unison. Supple leather, so tight it looks painted onto her muscular legs, leads up to blood red silk draped over a flat torso. Dark, corkscrew curls fall over her shoulders in waves, framin' a hauntingly familiar face contorted in angles and ridges that give away what this new mirror image is.

"Well ain't this just a happy little gatherin'," She snarls.

She flips the daggers in her hands and crouches to return them to the sheaths on her calves. She straightens and her yellow eyes catch mine as a deprecatin' smirk twists her mouth. She lets her fingers slip through the flames lappin' at her clothes and swaggers into the cave.

Her gaze flicks over to the Slayer and a sneer crosses her lips. She keeps walkin' 'til she's right in front of me and they circle each other warily. The vampire throws a right-handed uppercut and the Slayer ducks out of the way. The vamp's momentum carries her past the Slayer and they switch sides.

The vamp charges the Slayer and tries a double right-left combo, managin' to get the Slayer twice in the gut. I hiss and double over as pain radiates out from my own and I lift my eyes in stunned surprise to see the Slayer retaliate. The roundhouse kick catches the vampire in the jaw and I groan as I feel an answerin' pain in mine. The copper tang of blood fills my mouth and I lift my head to see the vamp lick blood from the corner of her mouth.

The vamp pulls a dagger from her boot and they lock eyes as she straightens. There's a short lull in the fightin' as they circle each other once more and then the vamp lunges for the Slayer. She flips over the vamp's head and quickly turns to face her again.

"So afraid you'll lose ya gotta bring a weapon into it? You're such a fuckin' loser."

"I ain't afraid of nothin'— 'specially not a little bitch that can't even control herself."

"Ha, so that's why ya let B haul ass, hmm?"

"That was all you, motherfucker."

She throws an uppercut with her left and when the Slayer's committed to blockin' the punch, the vamp lets the other hand carry the blade across her unprotected middle. I cry out and double over, my arms jerkin' reflexively at the chains. My shoulder blades protest the sudden strain and I clench my jaw as I straighten, regrettin' it as the older pain makes itself known.

"See what we're doin'? We need to work together," The Slayer snarls.

I look up to find the Slayer and the vamp lookin' at me and I freeze. The Slayer's wrapped one arm over her own belly and she's pointin' at me with the other hand. I follow the direction of her finger and wince. Blood's tricklin' slowly from a long, narrow gash spannin' the width of my lower belly.

The vamp smirks and saunters over. She reaches for me and I try to jerk away from her touch only to hit the stone wall. She swipes a finger over the wound and brings it to her mouth. She slips the digit between her lips and moans in pleasure.

"Fuck, I taste almost as good as B does."

I gag as a renewed taste of blood floods my senses. I glare at her and she lets her finger slip from her mouth. She pouts at me.

"Why ya gotta take away my fun?"

"Fuck you."

She quirks an eyebrow and lets her gaze flick to the chains and back to me. "Maybe later," She snickers.

She returns her attention to the Slayer who has made her way over to stand next to her. She considers her for a brief moment and then snorts.

"I'd rather work with that bossy little blonde bitch than you."

The Slayer laughs and shrugs. "Have it your way then."

Before she can react, the Slayer hits her with a left-right triple combo. She follows it up with a spin-kick that sends the vamp reelin' backwards and knocks the dagger from her hand. She doesn't give her time to recover before she's on her again.

It all blurs together as I'm lost in the pain. Bruises form and blood runs down my body from the various wounds my counterparts inflict on themselves and me. It all comes to a screechin' halt and I'm left huddled up, waitin' for the next strike to start it over.

Confused, I painstakingly force my swollen eyes to open and peer out. Through a fuzzy, red-tinted haze I see somethin' that makes my blood run cold. They're standin' just a few feet away, the vamp's arms pinnin' the defeated Slayer to her as her mouth hovers over a bared neck. Smirkin' victoriously despite the split in her lip still tricklin' blood down her chin, the vamp watches me expectantly.

She catches my gaze and lowers her mouth. Her fangs sink into the Slayer's throat and hoarsely, I scream out as the Slayer's pain becomes my own and blood fills my mouth once more. The sound of my distress rouses the Slayer and her eyes flutter open. She slumps back against the vamp and lets her gaze catch mine.

"This is what you are," She says weakly. "Accept it. If ya stop fightin' it, you'll be aight."

"She's killin' you," I choke out. "How do I accept that shit? I ain't like that anymore."

She smirks in response and lifts her hand to tangle it in the dark curls at the back of the vamp's head. The vamp retracts her fangs and lifts her head. Their eyes lock and then their mouths meet in a messy, copper flavored kiss. A wave of dark lust flows over me and then they separate, a thin string of red saliva trailin' between 'em 'til the Slayer wipes it away.

She drags her eyes back to mine and smirks. "Not everything's as it seems. Take a look at your body and you'll see."

My brows furrow and I look down in confusion. My eyes widen and I jerk my head back up to look at the vampire. As with mine, her wounds are slowly closin'. I lift my eyes back to the Slayer's.

"Why?"

Instead of answerin' me, the Slayer turns in the circle of the vamp's arm and cups her face. She strokes her thumbs over the contours of the vamp's sharp cheekbones. The vamp's eyes flutter shut and she sighs, bringin' a soft smile to the Slayer's lips.

Finally, she rasps, "I can't kill her. I don't have enough of a hold on this realm to do that. If I defeated her, it would only last 'til the next fight."

I'm hearin' what she's sayin', but I'm gettin' a little distracted. There's just somethin' really fucked up 'bout watchin' me gettin' all touchy-feely with myself. I shake my head and try to force my mind back to the convo at hand.

"Aight, but what's stoppin' her from killin' you?"

The vamp buries her face in the Slayer's neck again and one hand drops from the Slayer's lower back to squeeze her ass. I blink as the conflictin' sensations of pain and pleasure accompany the taste of blood. The Slayer chuckles huskily and looks over her shoulder at me.

"She can't kill me 'cause she'll go fuckin' nuts without me."

"Then why were ya fightin'?"

"Ya mean ya can't figure it out?" She snickers.

I roll my eyes. 'Course I can. I'm a stubborn bitch who refuses to give in even when I should. And I like to fight.

The vamp finally lifts her head away from her neck and brings her gaze back to me. Her eyes go unfocused for a sec like she's lookin' through me and then she sneers.

"'Course it ain't gonna matter if ya don't get a hold of yourself. Then again, looks like purgatory here's got a hold on ya."

"What the fuck are ya talkin' about?"

"You're hangin' on by a thread. You're just the part of the soul that bonded with the Slayer."

Chapter Nineteen: The Killer in Me

I suck in a harsh breath as I surge awake. The first thing I'm aware of is that I'm back in my livin' room. The second thing is the pain. My entire body aches.

I force myself to move so I can turn the lantern on. The dim light confirms what my body's tellin' me. All ready healin' wounds are scattered over my bare thighs and my tank top's been shredded. I brush aside the white cotton scraps to see extensive bruisin' all along my torso and the long cut on my belly from the vamp's dagger.

I hesitantly lift a finger to probe at the jagged edges of the wound and a jolt of fiery pain shoots through my belly. I tense and wait for the pain to subside before I stand. My thoughts are racin' from the realization that it wasn't just a nightmare.

I retrieve my cigarettes from my jacket and light one up. I inhale deeply and then blow the smoke out in one long stream. I pace the floor as I try to achieve some sort of calm. That dream may have been full of info, but ain't none of it helpin' any right now. I'm just as agitated as I was 'fore I went to sleep, if not worse.

I'm on my third cigarette 'fore my thoughts gain any form of clarity.  I come to a stop in front of the fireplace and I press my hand against the recent crack in the brick wall. I take a hit off the cigarette and shake my head.

What the fuck was the point in that shit? Did the PtB decide it's been too fuckin' long since they fucked with my head? I take another puff and shake my head. I don't really think they had anything to do with that 'cause it wasn't their style.

So maybe I need to think about what the incest twins were tryin' to tell me. I grimace. Somethin' 'bout both of 'em kinda irks me. Maybe it's 'cause they've both driven me to murder? I may have held the weapons, but those two helped me get there.

I turn to lean against the wall and run my fingers through my hair. My eyebrows furrow and I sigh. I ain't gonna get any rest 'til I do, so I might as well get it over with. I let myself consider some of the things I remember 'em sayin'.

I get why the slayer let the vamp drink from her. It was to show me that I need the Slayer so I don't get lost to the hunger. But what was that shit about my soul?

Does that mean I still have one? Wait, no. They said only part of my soul was bonded with the Slayer. So that's why I've been in control at times, I guess.

But why do I keep losin' it? If they know that they need each other to survive, then why do they keep fightin'? They've obviously accepted the status quo.

I lift my eyes and a sardonic smile crosses my lips as understandin' dawns. It's too fucked up for words.

All this time I've told myself and everyone else that I've accepted everything. Bein' a Slayer, the blood on my hands, and then when Dane turned me—each time I tried to act like I was five by five when the truth is, I was just hidin' behind it instead of acceptin' it. Each sitch became just another defense mechanism for me.

I've used the fact that I'm a Slayer to hide that there's still a hurt little girl inside me. I've used it to make excuses for my behavior. Then when we killed Finch, I used that as an excuse to run. Then I used the excuse of bein' a killer as a reason for my behavior, too. When I was turned, I used that as an excuse to turn my back on my callin'.

Even after I went to jail, I didn't really accept that I was a killer. Sayin' it is a whole 'nother thing. I was just tired of the internal conflicts. I had 'em even then.

I'm losin' control 'cause I ain't ever really had it at all. I keep strugglin' against what's happenin' and 'cause my soul's incomplete I ain't strong enough to win. I'm fightin' my instincts and 'cause of that, the Slayer part of me is tryin' to stay calm instead of keepin' my urges in check. They were tryin' to tell me that I gotta accept what I am to get through this.

The question is can I accept that I'm a killer? If I accept that I'm a Slayer and a vampire, then I'll have to. And I think that's what I've been fightin' against all this time.

It just goes to show that B really is THE Slayer, 'cause she accepted it a long time ago. I realized that almost ten years ago when we went up against The First. She was able to accept that she got those girls killed, but me? It still burns me when I think about the ones I was responsible for.

So can I accept all that? I close my eyes and let my head drop. I call up every memory I have of bein' a Slayer, each person I've killed, every moment of the past four years and I let it all play out as I make myself feel everything.

The feelings are almost too fuckin' much. The blind hatred I felt for Kakistos, the adrenaline of a good, hard fight, the dark thrill of a hunt, the burnin' lust after a kill. It all swells up, tightenin' my chest with agony and bliss 'til it pours out my eyes in tears.

My fingernails dig into my palms as I fight the urge to run and I force myself to stay still as it continues. The incredible warmth I feel when I drink from someone, the sensation of holdin' someone's life in my hands, the high of bein' in control, the hunger. It makes me shake with need.

The adrenaline of goin' all out with someone who can take it, the feelin' of knowin' someone's got my back, the completeness of movin' in time with someone else. It reminds me that there's so much more to life.

I feel myself startin' to calm down and still the memories come, softly now. The warm pressure of B's body curled into mine, the desire to sink into her and lose myself, the pleasure/pain of lovin' someone else, achin' to touch her 'til she screams my name, drinkin' and knowin' it's her blood that's warmin' me. It makes me quiver with desire.

This is who I am. I'm the vamp, and I'm the Slayer. There ain't any changin' that. I enjoy those things 'cause I was made to do 'em.

A surge of power flows through me and a slow, satisfied smile spreads across my lips as I let my eyes flutter open. I take a deep breath and revel in a contentment I ain't ever felt before. I stand there for a long time as my mind drifts aimlessly, just enjoyin' the unusual sensations.

A thought occurs to me and I tilt my head. Will it work? Doin' that would put the worst of it on my shoulders. Am I up for it? I smirk in answer to my question.

I know what to do now, and I know I can do it. I glance at my watch and then head for my bag. Eight thirty's late enough, there's no point in waitin' any longer.

I pull on a pair of jeans, a tank top, and my boots, and then run a brush through my hair. When I step outside onto the porch I idly note that there's a full moon out tonight. I set off down the driveway towards the cemetery, puttin' a little swagger in my stride.

Oh yeah, I'm a killer aight. My face morphs to game form and I chuckle. It's time I show everyone just what I can do.

I arrived at the crypt first for once. I sent B a text message on my cell while I walked over here, so it shouldn't be much longer. It's kinda hard to believe that dump I'm stayin' in is just a few blocks over from HQ. The neighborhoods are so fuckin' different it seems like they should be in different nations.

A familiar tingle works its' way up my spine and it takes me a moment to realize just what it is. A wonderin' grin spreads across my lips. Instead of the jarrin' jolt of energy I've been gettin' when a Slayer's around, it's more like what it used to be. It ain't quite the same but it's so much more pleasant than the mini-shocks treatment.

The door edges open and she slips inside. Her eyes meet mine immediately and I'm surprised to see hers widen. Her eyebrows furrow and she warily steps closer to me.

"What?" I ask sharply, uncomfortable with the scrutiny.

Her mouth opens and shuts a couple of times and then she finally manages to stammer, "Y—your eyes a—are black, Faith — I mean, l—like shiny black."

"Oh," I mutter.

Well, how the fuck else should I respond that that? It ain't like I can just look in a mirror and see for myself, now can I? I just gotta take her word for it.

"What's your point?"

"Why are they like that?" She asks tensely.

I grin wickedly. "Let's just say I've gotten in touch with my inner me."

She winces. "You know, Faith, I'm really not feeling too confident after that statement."

I laugh and hold up my hands. "Don't worry so fuckin' much, B. I'm fine."

Her eyes trace my face and confusion clouds her expression for a sec. Then she shakes her head and lets out a soft sigh.

"What's happened?"

"It's really kinda complicated, B."

That's puttin' it mildly. I ain't sure how to explain it without comin' off like a complete fuckin' lunatic but I gotta try. She won't go along with my plan 'til I do.

"Can you at least try to tell me so I'm not freaking out over here, Faith?"

"Aight," I blow out a breath. "So I had this dream."

She starts to interrupt and I hold up a hand. "I'm gettin' there, so just chill."

I hop up onto one of the stone coffins in the middle of the crypt to sit. "The dream was like a Slayer dream on Orpheus. I was chained to this cave wall and the chains were Slayer proof. Then two of me come out of these tunnels, 'cept one's the Slayer and the other's the vamp. They fight, and I'm sufferin' through everything they do to each other.

"I kinda got lost and then the next thing I know they're all over each other and tellin' me I gotta accept what I am." I pause, ignorin' the odd look that passes over her face.

Should I tell her the rest? It ain't like my soul really makes a difference in this sitch. I shrug internally and decide not to. She doesn't need to know. Tellin' her I lost control 'cause my part of my soul's stuck in purgatory ain't gonna help. That and for some reason, the thought of tellin' her rubs me the wrong way.

"What else happened, Faith?"

I shrug. "I woke up and found out it wasn't a dream." I rub the still healin' cut through my shirt. "I got the marks to prove it."

She crosses the room to me and puts her hands on my knees. She tilts her head and asks softly, "So what does it mean?"

I catch her gaze and hold it. "It meant I had to accept that no matter which way I look at it, I'm a killer. And I have."

Chapter Twenty: Communication Skillz

I can see the denial comin' 'fore she even opens her mouth to speak. Her eyebrows furrow and she shakes her head.

"F—Faith, that isn't—"

"What?" I interrupt. "It ain't true? Try again, baby."

She steps away and crosses her arms over her chest. I hop off the coffin and saunter over to her. She backs up and I follow 'til she's pinned against the wall. Leanin' one arm by her head, I lower my face closer to hers and an irrepressible grin creases my lips.

My voice lowers to a guttural whisper as I speak. "There ain't anything like the rush I get when I drain someone, B. Feelin' their life fadin', their struggles growin' weaker, the warmth that floods me. Havin' that power over someone else, it's..." I shake my head roughly and growl. "It's amazin'."

She swallows hard and chokes out, "Faith, that's... You're losing control."

"No," I answer softly. "I'm more in control than I've ever been, B."

It's the truth. I'm lettin' myself revel in the feelings instead of rejectin' 'em. And for the first time, I can think about it and not feel like I'm about to go off the handle. I ain't afraid anymore.

"Listen to what you just said, Faith. You just admitted that you enjoy killing someone."

I search the heartbroken hazel eyes and give her a sympathetic smile. I run the backs of my fingers along her cheek. B's eyes slide shut and she leans into the caress.

"B," I say softly. "It's part of who I am. I can't lie and say it ain't. What I can say is that for the first time ever, I feel like I can stop myself from crossin' the line. I know I can."

"But how do you know?" She asks almost inaudibly. "How do I know I can trust you?"

I kiss her forehead and let my hand trail down her neck to her chest. I flatten my hand out over her heart and smile sadly.

"I just do. I know it's hard, but I just need ya to trust your heart for a little while longer. Can you do that for me, B?"

Her eyes open and she gives me an inscrutable look. A minute passes 'fore she nods almost imperceptibly.

"Okay," She says shakily.

"Thank you," I breathe and lean forward to kiss her forehead again.

"Don't make me regret this," She mutters softly as she ducks under my arm.

"I won't."

I turn to face her and watch as she paces the floor a couple of times. She stops, blows out a shuddering breath, and then turns back around.

"Was that the only reason why you called a meeting?"

I grin broadly. "Nah, it ain't. I came up with a plan to help us beat this motherfucker."

Her eyes brighten and I got all her attention now. I get a little thrill at the sight of the tiny, proud smile twitchin' at the corners of her lips. Fuck, I'm such a sap. I shake the thought off and see an expectant look directed at me. I hate to disappoint, so I tell her.

(Buffy's POV)

"You — you're insane!" I sputter.

She did not just say that! She wants to go up against Joaquin alone? Surrounded by all his people?

I don't care if she plans on having us there too. Who knows what kind of tricks he has up his sleeve? He isn't a typical vampire. He actually has a brain that doesn't revolve around blood twenty-four/seven.

She crosses her arms over her chest and levels a stubborn look at me. I return it with equal measure.

"B, you said you'd trust me."

I throw my hands up and growl. "Well in that case, I'm insane!"

"What's so fuckin' crazy about it?"

I sigh in exasperation. "What makes you think he'll even accept a challenge from you?"

The smile on her lips grabs my attention. It's one of those that make my hormones sit up and beg. Damn it, I cannot be thinking about that right now.

"Let's just say I've made it personal, aight?" She drawls.

My heart clenches and I let my gaze fall. I don't want to ask, but part of me has to know. I try to steel myself for the answer.

"Just how close have you gotten to him, Faith?"

"Close enough."

I glare at her and snap, "Faith! Just give me a straight answer. That's all I want."

Her face darkens and she crosses her arms over her chest. "I fucked him, aight? That what ya wanna know?"

My chest tightens and I clench my jaw shut tightly. She walks over to me and gently grasps my chin, forcing me to look in her eyes.

Her voice lowers intimately and I'm shocked at the contrast between her actions and her words. "Ya wanna hear how fuckin' wicked it felt, B? Just how good I felt ridin' him? Or maybe ya wanna know why I was so tightly wound in the first place?"

Images play out in my head and I try to ignore them. The thought of him touching her has me so freaking angry and I'm struggling not to cry. This is the control she was claiming to have? I don't want or need to hear any more.

She starts to speak again and I interrupt, "Just shut up, Faith. You know, I really doubt that you're in any sort of control right now."

I'm surprised to see her smile. She shakes her head and chuckles.

"I was just tryin' to get ya to shut up so we could get back on track, B. We ain't got time to fuck around right now."

"Fine," I mutter. "Just explain why you're so convinced your plan's going to work."

She grins. "He has an ego as big as mine if not bigger, B. He's gonna be pissed as Hell when he realizes just how much he fucked up."

"Your point is? They still outnumber us. Just 'cause you take him out doesn't mean the rest of the threat goes away."

"He's keepin' the larger part of his army somewhere else. Only a couple hundred stay 'round here. We had worse odds with the First and most of our girls weren't even trained then."

I have to admit that she has a point there. But it still doesn't sit well with me.

"What about the weapons? We can arm ours as much as we want, but we can't dodge bullets, Faith."

A wicked grin forms on her full lips. "I finally got to check out the fourth floor. They got a lab up there. Ya wanna know somethin' interestin'?"

Odd subject changes worry me, but that glint in her eyes worries me more. It warns me that she's about to get incredibly, annoyingly, smug. I look at her warily.

"What?"

"Orpheus smells a lot like incense when it's bein' prepared. It's really sickeningly strong. First I thought they were burnin' a lot of incense, but there wasn't any. They were, however, workin' at their lab stations with beakers and Bunsen burners all 'round. Know what that spells?"

I narrow my eyes at her. "I know you have a point somewhere."

Her eyebrows twitch. "Three of 'em, but I guess ya don't meant those."

It doesn't take a genius to get the first two points she's insinuating, but a third? My eyes drift over her body and I flush when I realize what she's talking about. I shake my head and groan. Okay, mind on the job and out of Faith's pants, please.

"Then get to it," I answer dryly.

"Ya really know how to take all the fun out of it, y'know?" She lifts her hands as I glare at her again. "Aight, it means they can't fire guns inside. Orpheus is flammable."

"You frighten me," I mutter. "Why do you know so much about that drug?"

She snickers. "No mystery there. I wanted to know about it 'cause I used it back when I had to put Angelus back in his Angel shaped box."

Damn, she's hot when she's smug. Okay, not thinking that! Jesus, I need help.

No, what I need is for this to be over with so we can get to the more important things. I need to see a woman, this woman, about my hormones. Then we can deal with our issues. Not usually my thing, but I doubt I'll be able to think straight until we get that out of the way.

"So when do we do this?"

No! I did not just agree to this crazy as Hell plan of hers! Oh, God, I did. I need to have my head examined.

She gives me a dimpled grin. "Sunrise, day after tomorrow. Post teams outside the exits and at the gate to keep the demons from escapin'. I'll leave the rest for you to decide."

I can only nod and hope to God that this plan of hers works. We're going in half-blind, but I'm trying to trust her like she asked. I just hope it doesn't blow up in my face.

Her stomach growls and she presses her hand to her belly. She looks at me and sighs. "So, are we 'bout done here?"

My gaze drops and I shrug. "We've gone over the particulars. I just gotta set things up with Giles and get the girls ready. I guess that means you're done for tonight."

"Aight," She mutters. "I gotta motor, then."

She turns to go and I hesitate. I should just let her go do what she needs to, right? It doesn't mean anything just 'cause she drinks someone else's blood. It's not like she's going to kill them, right?

Her hand touches the door handle and I call out anxiously, "Wait!"

Damn it, I need to learn to leave well enough alone. Why do I do this to myself? It's just that the thought of her pressing up against someone else and sinking her fangs into their skin, it makes me angrier than the thing with Joaquin. I need help.

She looks over her shoulder at me. "What's wrong?"

I bite my bottom lip and look up at her through my lashes. "Where are you going?"

"Ya really wanna know?"

I nod and she laughs disbelievingly. "Why ya gotta make things harder, B? Ya know damn well what I'm goin' to do."

I run my hand through my hair and then let it drop. What to do? I recall the other night when I was so worried about her. I blow out a harsh breath and lift my head, decision made.

I slowly stroll over to Faith, lettin' my hips swing a little more than usual. Her eyes flick to mine as I step up to her. I press my hands against her belly and run them up the flat, muscled surface. My palms brush over her breasts, feeling her nipples harden at the touch, and I stop with my hands on her upper chest.

I lick my bottom lip and ask softly, "Do you really have to involve anyone else, Faith?"

Tension rolls off her in waves. She clenches her teeth and growls. "B, just lemme go."

I tilt my head, letting my hair fall away from my neck. I watch with satisfaction as her gaze falls to take in her fading marks still very much present. I run one hand up behind her neck and twine her hair around my fingers.

"C'mon, F," I taunt. "I know you want it."

"I don't wanna hurt you, B," She says softly, her face showing her conflict.

"You won't."

I tug her hair, pulling her closer until her face is right at my neck. Hot breath brushes against my skin and I shiver. She hesitates and then the tension suddenly drains from her. Her lips brush my skin and then I feel the pinch of her fangs as she bites me.

I'm getting lost in the fog that clouds my thoughts and I go easily as my body responds to her. I bite my lip and wrap my other arm around her neck to hold on. I pull Faith as close as I can and press my body into hers. She wraps her arms around my waist and growls against me as she feeds.

As a Slayer, this should disgust me, but it doesn't. At least not right now. Who knows how I'll feel when all this is over and I've had a chance to process it. Right now though, all I can do is moan in response as my clit throbs and a thin trickle of blood escapes her hungry mouth to run down my chest and beneath my tank top between my breasts.

Chapter Twenty-One: Whatever It Takes

I look out the window into the darkness of the early morning as I rub at the bite mark on my neck. It burns, but it usually does afterwards. I snort when it occurs to me that she bit me in the same spot Angel did. I'm willing to bet she did it on purpose, too.

I lean my forehead against the glass and groan as my amusement fades. The next little while is going to be a pain in the ass. I'm waiting for the others to join me in Giles' office so we can talk everything over.

I'm not looking forward to it. There's always someone who disagrees with the plan. Of course, it's usually me when I'm not the one who came up with it. I roll my eyes.

Faith would be having a party if she heard me admit being such a control freak. I sigh and shake my head. They're going to give me a hard time after the other day and I'm really not in the mood to have to argue this out.

A weak grin tugs at the corner of my mouth. No, what I'm in the mood for is silk sheets, hot, sweaty sex, and a very intense vampire-Slayer. I sigh for a completely different reason.

I'm glad I took the time to clean up before I sent one of the younger Slayers to round everyone up. But if my mind keeps up the vivid imagery, it's going to be a moot point. I shift my stance, uncomfortably aware of the low pulse restarting in my groin.

Footsteps pull me from my introspection and I turn around. I lift my gaze to see Spike and Angel entering through the open doorway. I immediately recognize the moment they see the bite mark. Their reactions are freakishly similar, really.

Angel's jaw muscles clench and his gaze jerks from my neck to my eyes. The anger is obvious and I'm not surprised to find hurt lurking beneath it. I just hope I never have to tell him that I'm glad it's her mark and not his anymore. I may have fallen out of love with him, but that doesn't mean that I don't love him at all.

I've been upset with him since Spike spilled the beans about Faith, but I'll eventually get past it. I was just angry 'cause he didn't tell me where she was. That he tried to kill her gets under my skin also. But, I've tried it too so I really don't have room to talk.

Kind of depressed and too tired to dwell on it further, I let my eyes dart away from Angel's. I glance at Spike, finding an angry, accusing look being directed at me. I just want to get this over with. I lift a questioning eyebrow, knowing he'll take the bait.

"What the bloody Hell happened?" Spike sputtered.

"That's a damn good question," Angel adds.

Oh God, shoot me now. Before I can even attempt to answer them, Giles comes in. He looks from them to me and shakes his head as he crosses to his desk.

"What seems to be the problem at this disgustingly early hour of the morning?"

"That's just what we're trying to find out," Spike growls.

I roll my eyes and rub my temples, feeling a headache starting to form. I bring my gaze to Giles, the least annoying person in the room at the moment.

"Let's just wait until everyone else is here, 'cause I don't want to repeat myself."

"All right," Giles answers slowly. "You will be telling us why you've been bitten again, correct?"

No, no, and Hell no. Eh, I don't suppose that's the answer he's looking for. No, I can't tell him that and I certainly can't say that it's 'cause I'm a kinky, jealous bitch.

The rest of our group file in and I let out a breath of relief. I'm off the hook for now. I wait until they're settled in their customary positions around the office. Their eyes look at me expectantly and I briefly consider where to start. Then I lean back against the sill, and crossing my arms over my chest, I proceed to tell them the plan we discussed.

When I finish, my eyes drift over my friends curiously. I'm not too surprised when it's Angel who speaks up first. While he may be over two hundred years old, he is still very much a male. Worse, he's a male whose pride has somehow been slighted.

"How do we know she hasn't turned on us? This plan could just be a setup."

I open my mouth and then let it snap shut. I have to struggle to keep from giving him an answer that's completely derogatory. What is it with me and egomaniacs?

Willow catches sight of my expression and scrambles to explain, "He—he does have a point, Buff. It was just the other day when you told us that she was losing control."

They're right, but it doesn't make me feel any better. I search out and capture Giles's gaze with mine. I give him a pleading look.

"She had that dream thing you were talking about, Giles. She described it to me."

A slight smile forms on his lips and he leans forward in his desk chair. He nods encouragingly at me.

"Tell me what she said."

I lick my lips nervously and try to recall exactly what she said. I knew letting myself get distracted by her general, all around hotness would be trouble. Yup, here goes trying.

"She said she was chained in a cave with Slayer proof chains. Then she said something about there being these tunnels. Two of her came out of them and one of them was a vampire and the other was a Slayer. They fought and she was suffering through whatever they did to each other.

"I guess the pain overwhelmed her 'cause she said the next thing she knew was they were all over each other and saying she had to accept what she is."

Oh yeah, I clearly remember that last part. I was confused at first when she said it, but it didn't last long. Then my mind had a field day supplying all sorts of triple X images, every one of them starring me, Faith, and her double.

Giles makes that weird humming sound he does when he's thinking and nods. "Yes that sounds about right. Was there anything else?"

I bite my lower lip in contemplation and then I nod. "Yeah, she said she was still hurt when she woke up." I look down at the floor. "She also said she feels more in control than she ever has before."

"I see," He says in an approving tone as he looks down at a notebook open on his desk.

I hesitate and then I ask softly, "Giles?"

He looks up at me again. "Yes?"

"I don't know if it has anything to do with it, but her eyes were kind of weird."

His brows furrow and he asks, "How so?"

"They were completely black and they kinda glowed."

I'm startled by the sudden, blindingly brilliant smile he gives me. He chuckles.

"That's wonderful! It means the Slayer is in full control. Your eyes were like that when we did the spell to defeat Adam."

Now that I think about it, I do remember Will talking about that. My eyes widen. Before I can ask anything, another voice interrupts me.

"That means she's like, super Slayer right now doesn't it?"

Xander really does have a way of phrasing things sometimes, you know? And he just took the question right out of my mouth.

"Essentially, yes," Giles replies.

That definitely explains the take-charge attitude she was displaying. I shake my head and clear my throat.

"What does that mean for us exactly?"

"For me, it means that right now I'd follow her into any fight, vamp or not," Kennedy pipes up.

I'm inclined to agree with her, but I was committed to it all ready. I have reservations, but they really don't have anything to do with being afraid of her. Being afraid for her and the other Slayers is another matter all together, though.

"You can't be serious," Spike interrupts.

"We are," I answer resolutely.

"You're going to just send these girls into this, knowing that you're delivering them into the hands of someone who might just be their worst enemy?"

"Hey!"

Kennedy starts to stand up and I wave her off. I give Spike a look that explains exactly what I really want to say. The words I give are just the nicer ones.

"No," I answer, letting steel seep into my voice. "I'm sending them into this, knowing that I'm delivering them into the hands of one of our own."

And I really do believe it now, I realize with a faint snort. How much did it take to finally convince me of that? I shake my head and blow out a breath.

No, I realized it when she was in my face telling me how it feels to take a life. What she feels then isn't too much different than what I'm feeling right now at the prospect of bringing Joaquin's army to its' knees. It just scares me, 'cause she isn't the only one who has issues with accepting who they are.

I turn my back on Spike and Angel and walk towards the door. I pause in the doorway and turn to look at them again. I wait until I'm sure I have everyone's attention.

"I told Faith to do whatever it takes to get this done," I start. "And that's exactly what she did. Now I'm gonna put my money where my mouth is and make sure someone's got her back."

I pause as I glance around, making sure to catch everyone's gaze at least once. Then I continue, "I'm going to get the girls ready, with or without you. I just hope my friends trust me enough to know I wouldn't drag them into this if I didn't think we could do it."

I glance around again, gaining a wink from Will and a smirk from Ken. God, she reminds me too much of Faith sometimes. I shake my head and turn to leave the room.

There are preparations to be made and I need to get away from that room. I won't be responsible for what I'll do if any of them decide to question me any further.

Chapter Twenty-Two: Caught Red-Handed

(Faith's POV)

I'm lyin' on my pile of blankets starin' at the ceilin' as last night plays over and over in my head. I should be thinkin' 'bout the battle that's goin down in less than two hours, but I can't get B outta my head. I caught that flash of jealousy in her eyes when she realized exactly why I wanted to leave. I keep havin' to remind myself that it doesn't mean anything, that she doesn't know everything that's happened.

I've been tellin' myself that the only reason she let me drink from her last night was to protect anyone else from me. It ain't doin' me any good. Every time I try, my mind calls up the memory of her firm body rubbin' against me and the scent of her arousal.

Nope, my mind just keeps screamin' that B wants me. My body's screamin' it too. My libido's gonna be the death of me.

It took everything I had to let her walk out that door last night. Not just 'cause I wanna fuck her 'til she's walkin' funny either. I just wanna hold her close for a while; no sex, no feedin' involved — just us. Not somethin' I ever thought I'd hear myself say, y'know?

I hated tellin' her 'bout Joaquin, but she just wouldn't leave it. Then I wanted her to drop it, so I said that other stuff. Afterwards, I wanted so fuckin' bad to tell her it didn't even hold a candle to just kissin' her. But we needed to get the ball rollin' so I couldn't.

I wish this was over with all ready, but at the same time, I don't. She ain't gonna want me when I tell her 'bout that pig bastard, and I can't be with her unless she knows everything. I smirk. When did I get so bloody fuckin' noble?

I shake my head and sigh. I don't know what I'm gonna do when this is finished with. I doubt I'll be satisfied with goin' back to Georgia. This little adventure's shown me just how much I've been missin' life as a Slayer.

It ain't just the violence that draws me to this life, either. Though, that is a fuckin' wicked good reason. I miss knowin' that my actions have saved someone's life. But if I really think about it, Slayin' is just another way to hold someone's life in my hands.

Somethin' is startin' to become disturbingly clear, though. What the vamp was sayin' 'bout me just bein' part of the soul and needin' to get hold of myself? I think she meant that part of my soul's in purgatory and that unless I get it back, I'm gonna lose control again.

Fear tightens my chest at that thought and I close my eyes as I swallow hard. So I know what I gotta do. I gotta get my soul back. But how can I?

The front door slams open and I jerk, startled. I go to flip to my feet and hear the hammers of at least four guns cock back. Dionne shoves through the crowd of vamps standin' in my livin' room and raises his gun, aimin' pointblank at my forehead.

"Take your guns from your holsters and drop 'em," He growls and then adds, "Slowly."

I do as he says and then look at him curiously. I decide to take a chance. I doubt Joaquin wants anyone but him to dust me so I think I'm safe for now.

"What's up, man? I ain't did shit."

"Fuck if I know. Joaquin just said to bring you in. Put your hands behind your head."

Slowly, I do so. What the fuck is this all about? I know there wasn't anyone tailin' me last night. I checked on the way there and on the way back.

He gestures another vamp over. "Frisk her." He glances back at me. "Don't try anything funny, got me?"

The vamp steps forward to pat me down and I grind my teeth together to keep from sayin' anything. I don't wanna chance pissin' Dionne off. He seems like the kinda guy who wouldn't think anything of endin' me and tellin' his boss I tried to get away.

The vamp's hands spend a little too much time at my tits and I look at him. I harden my expression, lettin' it speak for me. He jerks his gaze away from mine and quickly finishes the search, comin' up empty handed. I wasn't expectin' company, so I didn't bother to pack anything other than my guns.

The vamp pulls my hands down to the small of my back and slaps a pair of handcuffs on me. He finally steps back over to the others and Dionne holsters his gun, gesturin' for the rest to do the same. He walks up and grabs the cuffs, jerkin' me to my feet.

I move with the motion, climbin' to my feet as he pulls to keep any strain off my shoulders. I don't wanna give him the satisfaction of givin' me a dislocated shoulder. He motions the other vamps out and gives me a shove forward to get me movin' too.

Outside, he motions two vamps to either side of me and then moves ahead to walk with the rest of his unit. I glance over my guards to get a good idea of what I'm dealin' with here just in case I gotta haul ass. Both are in fairly good shape, but they ain't any real threat. I'd be more worried about the modified guns they're carryin' than anything else.

I turn my attention to the others and assess 'em as best I can. Strong, confident, well-armed, I'm sure I can deal with 'em fine. The biggest threat is Dionne. That big son of a bitch could probably break me if I let him get his hands on me.

I shudder. Kinda reminds me of Dane. But he ain't Dane, and I ain't just a Slayer anymore. That reminder calms me down and I turn my attention to my next task.

Rollin' my shoulders and pretendin' to stretch, I tense my arms and tug at the handcuffs. The metal gives slightly and I smirk as all the tension I was feelin' fades. Thank God for stupid ass sons of bitches like these.

The walk over was uneventful. My guards just ignored me and I gladly returned the favor. It ain't like they could tell me anything useful anyway. If Dionne doesn't know why Joaquin sent for me, I doubt these fuckers do.

We enter the warehouse and I bite back a chuckle. There are vamps and demons crowdin' the first floor, and some are even leanin' against the railin' on the second. There's a general air of primal excitement jarrin' my senses.

A low buzz of conversation rises as a few catch sight of me. I see some pointin' at me and the leers on their faces make the hair at the nape of my neck stand on end. Silence suddenly falls and then the crowd parts to let us through.

I look across the room through the now open space in front of me and lock eyes with a pair of angry, almost black ones. Joaquin's sittin' at the head of the table, Aiden standin' to one side and an open space on the other. His expression clouds for a brief second and then goes blank.

"Ah, Ms. Lehane, so glad you could join us," He drawls.

I chuckle slightly. I'd all ready figured he'd discovered who I am. I just wanna know how.

"Y'know, most vamps don't like it when I'm 'round," I say conversationally. "Glad to see not everyone feels that way."

His lips twitch and he smiles humorlessly. "I'm sure."

Without lookin' away, he gestures to my escort. "Take your places, gentlemen."

They all spread out, Dionne movin' to the open space on Joaquin's left. I lift a curious eyebrow as I'm left standin' alone.

He shrugs. "I figured you would rather remain standing for this as well, yes?"

"Whatever."

I saunter over, lettin' a relaxed smile spread across my lips. My gaze catches Aiden's for a brief sec and he jerks in surprise. I wink and then drag my eyes back to Joaquin's as I continue 'round the table. I don't stop 'til I'm standin' just a few feet in front of Aiden.

I lean my hip against the table and run my fingers over the grain of the table. Joaquin's eyes follow the movement and then lift back to mine. He shakes his head.

"Are you not even the least bit worried?"

I shrug. "What would be the point? I ain't got a clue what ya problem is, yet. I mean, is it 'cause I ran out on ya the other night?"

His face darkens and he snarls, "Don't toy with me, bitch!"

I smirk. "Aight, is it Irish/Italians from Southie? Maybe it's ex cons ya got issues with?"

"You are really trying my patience, Slayer!"

I snap my fingers. "Ah, that's it!" I laugh and shake my head. "Knew I forgot to tell ya somethin'."

He stands and stalks over to me. He grabs the front of my tank top and jerks me forward, pullin' me face to face with him.

"Keep talking and I will make your change real, Slayer!"

I grimace as some of his spit flies out and hits my face. I wipe my cheek against my shoulder and look at him. I try not to say it, really I do, but it just comes out anyway.

"Say it, don't spray it, stubby!"

He releases me only to grab me by the throat and then he tosses me backwards. I land on my back on the table and look up to see him lunge at me. I bring my booted feet up and kick at his chest, sendin' him flyin'. He slams into the cages and slides to the floor.

I don't wait for him to get up. I flip to my feet on the table and roll my shoulders. I let the motion flow all the way to my wrists and bring my arms up, snappin' the chain between the handcuffs. I look up to see Joaquin runnin' towards me, game face on.

I let my face shift to the familiar angles and ridges in response. My body shifts over my center of balance and my fists hang ready at my sides. I snarl when Aiden reaches out to intercept him.

Joaquin rounds on him and growls, "What?"

I watch curiously, wonderin' what's up. That fucker's grated on my senses since I first met him and he's actin' weird. I raise an eyebrow as Aiden looks up at me.

"What magic are you using to keep up that appearance so convincingly that I cannot even sense it?"

I laugh in disbelief. I wasn't really payin' attention earlier when Joaquin made his comment, but now I'm gettin' it. They think I ain't a real vamp.

I trail my tongue over my fangs and flip down, landin' in front of 'em. I smirk at Aiden.

"Ain't any magic involved," I drawl.

A clock on the back wall of the room catches my attention and I snicker when I realize I'm right on time. My eyes drift back to Aiden and I close the distance between us. I gaze at him for a sec, lettin' my amusement show. Just as he starts to speak, I move.

In one sudden violent motion, I grab his shirt and jerk him to me. I shove my fist into his chest—skin, muscle and bone givin' way. My fingertips close 'round his heart and our eyes lock. Horror widens his eyes and I pull my hand back, tearin' his heart out.

His body reels and then falls backwards. I open bloodied fingers and let his wetly glistenin' heart drop to the floor. I step on it and turn to face Joaquin, lettin' the heel of my boot grind it into the cement. Aiden's body bursts into ashes as it hits the floor.

That's one less problem we gotta worry 'bout. He was the unknown in this sitch. I don't know what he might've been able to do, but now it ain't gonna be an issue.

An explosion shatters the silence of the warehouse just as Joaquin lunges for me. I laugh and meet his attack just as those around us react to the sudden arrivals. Slayers are pourin' through the now wide, jagged openings where the front and back doors once were with the weak, grayish early mornin' sunlight chasin' after 'em.

I go through the motions of the fight, duckin' and throwin' punches and kicks. A familiar primal energy surges through me, urgin' me to give myself up to it. I hesitate, givin' him an openin'. An uppercut rocks my head back and I roll with it, liftin' my head back up to face him and I lick at the blood poolin' in the corner of my mouth.

Our eyes lock and I let myself go. One last thought goes through my head 'fore all I know is the drivin', feral ecstasy of battle. I didn't even have to challenge the motherfucker.

Chapter Twenty-Three: Unrestrained

(Buffy's POV)

I give Will a nod, giving her the go ahead. We all know the parts we play, so we don't need words. I watch as she mutters under her breath in Latin for a long space of time and then she lifts her head and a light shines from her as several shouts rend the air. I look back towards the warehouse in time to see the guards going up in flames.

I check to see that the coast is clear and then I step out from the shadows of the other warehouses. I glance over the sixty-three girls that follow me and give them a smile. The predatory glints that sparkle in each and every set of eyes there tell me we all feel the same need. I don't see any reason to delay anyone's gratification.

I jerk my head at Will and seconds later the fence gate goes flying. I nod at Ken, she returns it, and then she walks away. Half our force splits off to go with her to back of the warehouse and await the signal. Another gesture from me and a group breaks off to spread out the length of the gate entrance. Ken all ready knows to set up guards at the back when she gets there.

I lead them towards the warehouse and Will mumbles another spell. A loud explosion makes my ears ring and debris flies overhead. The spell left a gaping, jagged hole in the building where the doorway used to be.

I share another look with Will, telling her to give Ken the word. She nods in reply and now it's time for the second phase of Faith's plan.

Those of us on the frontlines of our advancing groups have to clear the way for the rest as we enter the warehouse. We're staking vampires left and right just so we can all get inside. The air grows thick with heat and dust and breathing is nearly impossible.

I feel someone come up on my left and I take a glance to see Wes fighting shoulder to shoulder with me. I grin at the concentrated look on his face and jerk my attention back to the fight just in time to duck a right-cross from a vampire. I return the punch with one of my own, stake him, and then move through his drifting ashes to the next one.

I wasn't surprised that my friends came through for me. They usually do. Unfortunately, we realized that there was no way Angel and Spike could help this time. Daylight isn't exactly their best friend. I think they were angrier about that than Faith's bite mark.

I dust another fashion disaster and I'm abruptly given a clear view straight to the center of the warehouse. What I see makes my heart slam against my ribcage. Faith is facing off against Joaquin.

The really scary part? I've never seen her move this fast before. She's a blur amid the scrambling vampires and demons surrounding us. Every movement is full of an unrestrained violence ten times more intense than usual for her.

Suddenly, she looks up and our gazes lock for a brief second. From where I'm standing, the fierce joy glowing in her black eyes is obvious. She gives me a grin and winks at me. Then she's moving again and my view is blocked as more of the enemy move in front of me. I reluctantly return to the fight, trying to resist the urge to go to her side.

I flip over a vampire's head and kick him in the back before I land. I turn to see him scrambling to get up and I reach down and grab his arm, forcing him wide open as I move in for the kill. I go on to the next, feeling the familiar wild energy pumping through my veins.

Faith was never alone in finding enjoyment in what we do. I just never wanted to own up to it 'cause I was too busy whining about wanting a normal life. Admitting I enjoy it would've been admitting that I didn't have as much a problem with being a Slayer as I pretended.

Thing is? The adrenaline, the power, the victory, and the need—they make all the pain and tears worth it. I toss a vamp into the air, stake him, and he comes back down in a shower of dust. Hungry and horny? Oh yeah, I'll feel it, F.

(Faith's POV)

I like a cat with a mouse right now. I could end it at anytime, I just don't wanna. I'm just playin' with him 'cause I ain't ready for this fight to be over with yet. I'll eventually have to let it come to an end though 'cause there're plenty of others to start.

He's gettin' so frustrated that he's making more mistakes. Out of all the blows I've landed on him, he's maybe gotten a couple in on me. God, this is wicked.

"C'mon, lover, put some effort into it why don't ya?"

His eyes flash angrily and he throws a wild punch. I duck under his arm and grab it, pullin' it up behind him. I let the motion follow through, usin' his momentum to flip him. He lands on his back and I straddle him, grabbin' a fistful of his shirt. I give him a wicked grin.

"Brings back memories, huh?"

He tries to buck me off and I tighten my thighs 'round his hips and ride it out. I end his struggle with a strike to his solar plexus that makes him freeze for a sec. I jerk him up by his shirt and let loose with a few vicious punches to his face 'fore I release him again. I let him drop back to the floor and then I roll off him.

I turn my back on him and glance around, findin' a Slayer fightin' nearby. I give it brief consideration and then I stroll over to her. I wait 'til she stakes the vamp she's fightin' and then tap her shoulder. She spins, stake held ready and I pluck it out of her hand.

"'Scuse me, I need this for a sec."

She just gapes at me in response and I snicker. Then I turn back around to find Joaquin chargin' at me. I tuck the stake into the back of my pants, shrug and then meet him halfway.

I negligently block the first few blows and then I catch his fist in my hand. He tries to hit me with the other and I duck the blow. Then I twist his arm up behind him again, 'cept this time I grab his shoulder to keep him from flippin' and I don't stop 'til I feel his shoulder pop out the joint. I hear a muted pop and he screams.

I sweep his legs from under him, force him to his belly and pull the stake. I flip him, catch his gaze and then start to bring it down to his chest. Somethin' big hits me from behind and I fly over Joaquin's head to land on my belly a few feet away. A heavy weight pins me to the ground and I flex my muscles as I arch up, tossin' it off.

I roll to my back, flip to my feet and find Dionne climbin' to his feet. Fuck yeah, this is gonna be fun. I flip the stake in my hand and return it to my waistband. I ain't gonna need that just yet.

Dionne charges at me and I duck away. Ain't no way in hell I'm lettin' him get his hands on me. I ain't got a death wish.

He comes at me again and I slam a fist into his ribcage before I slip away out of reach. Another blow comes at me from a different side and I spin 'round to find Joaquin back on his feet. Ah, shit. Now I gotta deal with both of these fuckers.

I see Dionne runnin' at me out of the corner of my eye and I put Joaquin out of my mind. I'll worry about him later. I shrug, bow slightly and charge forward to catch Dionne in the gut with my shoulder and he goes flyin' back a few feet into a concrete pillar. His head bounces off the concrete and I start to go after him, only to feel a sucker punch right in the kidney.

I stiffen in response and slowly turn back to Joaquin. I sneer and shake my head as I retrieve my stake.

"Oh, this is it, motherfucker."

I reach out and grab a handful of his hair, forcin' his head back and exposin' his throat as he bends backwards. His hands clutch at my arm, leavin' his chest unprotected and I go in for the kill. My stake pierces his heart and I'm grabbed from behind just as he bites the dust. Thickly muscled arms wrap 'round my waist and I'm dragged backwards.

'Fore I can get away, Dionne turns me 'round and slams me onto the table. The small of my back hits the edge with all my weight behind it, but the pain doesn't register. I'm frozen as he looms over me and my mind slips off to another time, another place.

"You're mine, Slayer," He hissed.

Oh, God, my mind cried out as I gazed up from the floor. Dane's dark eyes gazed back at me, a dangerous light shinin' in the depths. I knew I was in trouble, but before I could move, he grabbed my shirt and hauled me up.

A fiery pain lances up my spine, pullin' me back to the here and now. Dionne's pullin' me to him by my shirt and I grip his arms as I force myself to move. Despite the agony it causes, I wrap my legs 'round his waist and tense, preparin' to toss him over my head. Then suddenly his eyes go wide and his gaze drops from mine.

"Oh fuck me."

I follow his line of sight to find the very tip of a stake protrudin' from his chest right where his heart is. His eyes meet mine again and then he explodes, showerin' me with dust. I let my legs fall, my feet hittin' the floor, and another jolt of pain jars my spine. I wince and look up, findin' myself lookin' into a pair of hazel eyes.

B smirks at me and shakes her head as she holds a hand out to me. "You know, I could get a complex if you keep getting into positions like that."

I accept her help, grabbin' her hand, and she pulls me to my feet. I'm clenchin' my jaw to keep from screamin' as the pain in my spine returns with a vengeance. It starts to fade quickly and a wave of relief floods me. I open my mouth to speak and then I just shut it with a shake of my head.

"Ah, fuck it," I mutter and jerk her to me by our still joined hands.

Her hands fly to my shoulders in startled response and I grab her hair with my free hand. I pull her mouth to mine and kiss her, hard and fast. Words just couldn't have described just how grateful I'm feelin' right fuckin' now.

Chapter Twenty-Four: An Old Friend in Me

(Buffy's POV)

The kiss breaks just as abruptly as it began and I'm left standing there as she walks off. All I can do is blink and stare after her, dumfounded. The flow of blood is having a hard time rerouting back to my brain after the sudden southern trip it took.

Finally, she looks back over her shoulder at me. Her gaze drifts over me and then she gives me an amused look.

"Comin', B?"

Oh, but don't I wish. I'm still having trouble so it takes me a few seconds to get any words out.

"Huh?"

Okay, so it was more of a grunt than anything. But don't I get points for trying?

She shakes her head and laughs. With one last look, she snorts and then throws herself back into the fight. She stakes a vampire and moves on to the next.

"Better come after me, B. Never know when I'll need ya to guard my ass again."

I only just hear her words above the din in the warehouse. But they serve their purpose and I follow her into the thick of it. It's not long before we're shoulder-to-shoulder in the middle of the warehouse, surrounded by vampires and Slayers.

Four vamps come after us, two on each side and familiar hands grab mine. Faith's momentum turns us around and I leap up into a spin-kick. They stumble back and my arms cross with Faith's as I land. I continue the maneuver, turning as Faith completes it with a spin-kick of her own. We end up back where we started at and share a laugh as we return to the fight.

The cacophony of sounds sets a familiar rhythm that my body is starting to respond to. Without hesitation, I give myself into it. My moves gain a natural fluidity that Faith's easily matches. A smirk plays over my lips in answer to the one on hers.

And we have synchronized Slayage, ladies and gentleman. I chuckle and duck, letting her take out the vamp trying to sneak up behind me. We slap hands in a high-five as she moves behind me to guard my back.

Back-to-back, we continue the fight. Everything else starts to fade from my awareness, until the only things that exist for me are her presence and the opponents around us. Not even the other Slayers register in my consciousness now.

I've fought at the side of hundreds of Slayers by now, a few humans, and even some demons. But none of them could ever, ever match up to what it's like fighting with her by my side. It's like we become an extension of each other. The way we move is magic.

I just wish it hadn't taken me so long to accept it. Things could've been so different if I hadn't kept rejecting our connection. I decided when she agreed to help us this time that I wouldn't keep fighting it. Even with everything that's happened I still feel the same way.

We have a lot of stuff we need to deal with, but there's hope for us yet. I throw a punch at a green-skinned demon that's just come at me. He growls and grabs for me, only to receive a knife in his lung by way of an arm reaching around me. I look over my shoulder at Faith, discontented.

"Sorry," She says with a grin, obviously not even a little apologetic.

She jerks the knife from his ribcage and he grabs at the wound as he collapses with a gurgling sound. I reach down to snap his neck before I move on. I find myself face-to-face with a vampire with one too many piercings in odd places and I grimace.

"You know, I've never really seen the point in getting that part of your nose pierced."

I duck a sloppy swipe at my head and grab her arm, flipping her onto the ground with her own momentum. She clambers to her feet and comes at me again. I shrug as I duck around her.

"I mean, really. Is it even hygienic?"

She punches me in the side and I roll my eyes as I grab her arm. I catch her gaze with a wry look.

"You hit like a girl."

She looks at me in confusion as I pull her to me, and then I slam my fist repeatedly into her gut. I kick her legs out from under her and follow her to the ground, staking her when she hits. I straighten and look for my next opponent.

He finds me. A bigger version of the green-skinned demon Faith took care of tackles me from the side. I hit the ground with a grunt and shove him off me, or at least I try to. He pins me to the ground, surprisingly strong considering how weak the other one was.

I struggle fruitlessly against the hold he has on me. His arm lifts and my eyes widen as a thin, jagged spike slides out of his wrist. Oh fuck—

(Faith's POV)

Fuck me! I quickly stake the vamp I'm fightin' and take off towards B. She's just a few feet away, but I gotta shove a few idiots out of my way to get to her. Shit, I think one of 'em was a Slayer.

Oh, well. She'll get over it. I grab one of the metal foldin' chairs away from the table pull it apart. The metal screeches in protest as the seat of the chair tears down the middle, leavin' a jagged edge. I toss the bigger half and close the distance between us.

I catch the demon's arm in my hand, stoppin' his spike less than an inch from B's head. The demon jerks his head up to look at me in surprise and I give him a smirk. I bring the chair piece up across his throat, the edge slicin' through it and sendin' blood flyin'. I look down at B and raise an eyebrow.

She grimaces and shoves his corpse from her. She wipes at the blood and slowly sits up. She looks back up at me.

"Gee, thanks."

"Anytime," I wink.

I toss my makeshift weapon so I can grab her hand and then jerk her to her feet. I smack her on the ass and get back into the fight. I'm comforted by the heat of her when she gets back-to-back with me. I prefer it when she's right there so I can keep an eye on her – she gets into too much trouble otherwise.

It doesn't take us long to find the rhythm once again. I sidestep a knife swipe and grab the vamp's arm, bringin' it down on my bent knee and revelin' in the snap of the bone. I stake the vamp and move on.

A fist catches my jaw and I roll with the punch. My mouth fills with blood from where my teeth cut into my cheek and I slowly lift my eyes to the vamp responsible for it. I lick my lips and then spit the blood into his face.

"You motherfucker," I snarl.

I grab his throat and ram him back against a support post. I bring my knee up into his nuts and he bowls over with a shrill cry. I take the opportunity to grab a fistful of his hair and slam his face down against my knee. I pull him up by his hair and ram my stake home.

I turn 'round, grabbin' B's shoulders and flippin' over her to kick her opponent in the head. He stumbles back as I land and I grab him, pullin' him right into my stake. He bursts into dust and I blow a speck of it off my nose.

I drop to my back on the floor to do a scissor-kick, sendin' two vamps flyin' as I leap back to my feet. If life after death as a Slayer doesn't work out, I'm sure I could find a job as a break dancer. I snort and slam my stake into an unsuspectin' vamp's chest.

I turn and somethin' hits my shoulder and slides down across my chest, but I'm so far in the zone it doesn't matter right now. A sword slices through the air towards me and I bring my hands up, clappin' 'em over the flat of the blade and stoppin' it abruptly. I let go and grab the vamp's wrist, twistin' 'til the bone snaps and breaks through skin. The sword drops from suddenly nerveless fingers and hits the ground.

I kick the sword aside and release him to slam the base of my palm into his face, breaking the bridge of his nose. Blood gushes from the injury but I don't give him time to get pissed. I stake him and walk through a shower of his ashes to reach the next contestant.

The hair on the back of my neck stands on end and I find myself lookin' into blood red eyes. The fucker in front of me looks wicked. He's shorter than me, probably about 5'3, but he's wider than a Mack truck and his skin matches the color of his eyes. His lips curl up into a sneer, revealin' razor sharp teeth.

A hand bigger than both of mine put together clips me in the ribs. The pain doesn't register but I dimly recognize the feelin' of my ribs crackin'. He catches me in the gut with another punch and the wind rushes out of me. I double over in reaction to the pain that suddenly pierces the adrenaline surgin' through me.

I straighten quickly, only to have a familiar sound drop me to my knees. I look up and a fine mist of blood rains down on me as the sword in B's hand takes the demon's head off. I stand, laughin' as I lick the blood from my mouth.

B's eyebrows furrow and her gaze drops. I watch as her hand lifts and she gently touches my upper chest. Her fingers brush aside the remnants of my shredded tank top to reveal a wicked gash runnin' from my shoulder down across my chest, endin' just at the rise of my left breast. I wince as the throbbin' pain makes itself known.

"Fuck, that's gonna be a bitch to heal."

She laughs disbelievingly and mutters, "Only you, Faith."

My eyebrows furrow. "What the fuck's that supposed to mean?"

She shakes her head and covers the wound back up. "Most people would freak 'cause they were that close to dying. But you, you're worried it's going to take a while to heal."

I shrug. "What's your point?"

She doesn't answer me and I jerk my head up, to find her gazin' over my shoulder. Suddenly, I'm aware of the loud silence surroundin' us. I look up, confused to find that the only ones standin' are ours. And they're all starin' at me and B, wide-eyed.

"What?" I snarl, taken off-guard.

Chapter Twenty-Five: Predatory

Fuck, I'm so glad that shit's over with. 'Course, I'm even happier now that B's sent her little troops off to do their own things. One more second of them starin' at us like we're Messiahs and I'd have had to put the smack-down on some-fuckin'-body. I get that me and B are hot as fuck, and seein' us fight's a mind-fuck and a half, but Jesus!

I'd be ecstatic if she'd make 'em all leave. There are plenty of things I can think of that I'd like to be doin' and none of 'em involve sittin' in a dark corner in a dusty warehouse. But the only thing my mind is willin' to supply me with at the moment are some wickedly inventive images of me and B.

My libido's on overdrive and I'm goin' nuts just sittin' here but there's nothin' else for me to do. I can't go much further than where I am 'cause the sun's high enough to shine inside the entrance now. All I can do is sit and watch the Scoobies and the Slayers doin' their thing. And I'm stuck here 'til they're ready to go.

My gaze keeps strayin' to where B's standin' across the room. She's talkin' to Red and Ken and gesturin' with her hands. Every so often, a word or two drifts to where I'm sittin' but it's just like so much fuckin' Greek to me. I sigh and my gaze drifts down.

I tilt my head slightly and my eyes narrow. I smirk. Her body's vibratin' with tension and she looks like she's 'bout to pop. I can feel the energy comin' off her from here.

Suddenly, her stance shifts and I glance up to find her lookin' back at me. Her mouth is parted and her tongue quickly darts out to swipe at her bottom lip. I give her a dangerous smile and she shivers.

(Buffy's POV)

She's looking at me like she wants to eat me. I bite my lip to stifle a moan. Oh, God, I want that too.

Buffy?"

I jerk my gaze back to Will and blush. I scrub at my face and shake my head.

"I—I'm sorry, Will. What was that?"

Kennedy clears her throat to cover a laugh and I glare. She quickly holds up a hand to placate me.

"Sorry. I was just telling you that everything checked out. We took care of the ones we found hiding on the other floors. I sent a bunch of the uninjured Slayers upstairs to go through everything and they're going to let us know if they find anything noteworthy."

I sigh. "Well, I guess all that remains for me to do is to check on the injured."

Kennedy shakes her head. "Nope, all ready did that too. Wes brought the MV around and he's making sure they're taken care of."

Thank God, or Giles, for the medical van. It's an RV filled with medical equipment, but some of the Slayers started calling it an MV and that's where it all went wrong. But odd names aside, it's pretty useful in our line of work. Even more helpful is that we usually have at least three Slayers with medical training on hand.

I groan. "Is there anything left that I can do?"

"You mean other than grunt work?" Kennedy quips and then she shrugs. "Well, yeah. There is something you can do."

"What?" I ask warily.

I don't like that look. It usually means she's about to be true to her bratty nature.

Deadpan, she replies, "You can get Faith to stop scaring the other Slayers."

"Huh?" I ask, confused.

She points and I look in the direction she's indicating. I meet Faith's gaze again and I'm trapped.

"I've seen more than a couple of Slayers take a glance at her and scamper off like they were afraid she was getting ready to pounce."

I blink and jerk my head around to glare at Ken again. "She isn't any danger to anyone here. Tell them they need to calm down. She's just a little... tense right now."

"Um, I dunno, Buff," Willow says contemplatively, a slight grin tugging at one corner of her mouth. "I'm actually a little worried for your safety right now."

"What?" I ask sharply.

Please, Will. I plead silently. I'm a little on edge myself right now. This isn't the greatest time for someone to start in on Faith.

"She looks like she's going to eat you alive," Willow explains, unable to hide her smile any longer.

"Oh, God, Will," I groan and cover my eyes with one hand as I point at her with the other. "You're evil!"

"You didn't see the way she was looking at Faith, babe," Kennedy interrupts. "I think it's actually Faith we should be worried for."

I slam my eyes shut and shake my head as I blush hotly. I try to ignore the chuckles coming from my supposed friends. I reopen my eyes and shake my head at them.

"You're both evil. I swear if you don't leave me alone, you'll both be on kitchen duty for the next two weeks."

Kennedy shudders and bites her lip, trying to calm down. A snort escapes and she claps a hand over her mouth.

I throw my hands up and walk off. "Maybe I will go talk to her. At least she won't pick on me."

"No, she'll just pick at you," Kennedy calls after me.

I dodge a group of Slayers cleaning up demon corpses and make my way over to where Faith is. As I near her, my body temperature rises and I tremble in reaction to the primal energy she's putting off. My eyes narrow and I take a deep breath as I stop in front of the chair she's sitting in.

(Faith's POV)

Eyes half-lidded, I tilt my head back to gaze up at B. I give her a lazy smile in response to the heated look she's givin' me.

"Somethin' I can do for ya, B?"

I watch her take a deep, shudderin' breath and then she shakes her head with a laugh. She absently rubs her thumb over a cut on her forearm.

"Why do I have a feeling anything you say right now's going to sound like a come-on?"

I shrug. "I dunno—maybe 'cause it is?"

I know we need to get our issues outta the way 'fore we let things go further than they all ready have, but my body ain't listenin' to reason. Apparently my mouth ain't either.

"How much longer we gotta stay here?"

She shrugs. "I think we can get out of here soon. I just have to do one more check and then go pull my car up to the door."

A voice interrupts my reply, "Hey, Buffy!"

We break our gaze and look up to see Ken comin' towards us with a file in one hand. She winces under our scrutiny and shrugs.

"I didn't want to interrupt, but one of the younger Slayers found something I thought you guys should see."

She holds a folder out and Buffy snatches it away. She flips it open and a piece of paper drifts out, flashes of color catchin' my attention. I snatch it outta the air and flip it over. I blink in reaction to seein' my own mug shot lookin' back at me.

My lip curls up in a sneer in unconscious reaction. Jesus, I look fucked up in that pic. It's one of the ones they took when I first turned myself in. I was pretty beat up and kinda dead on my feet at the time.

'Course, I've taken the phrase "dead on my feet" to a whole new level, but enough with my morbid sense of humor. I hand the picture to B and shrug.

"Don't know why they had that shitty thing."

"It doesn't look that bad," B replies absently and then waves the folder in her hand at me. "They've got all kinds of info on you up until you disappeared, Faith."

Heh, what world is she livin' in? That pic has to be the worst one I've ever seen of myself, with the exception of one that my ex, Kenny has. Then again, there ain't much worse than a picture of me fucked up on God knows what and drunk as a dog.

"Guess that's how they found out who I was," I mutter.

"What?" Buffy asks in confusion.

Oh yeah, that's right. With everything that's happened, I ain't had the chance to tell her 'bout that.

"They came after me just a little bit before we were set to attack. He had me brought in and was wicked pissed." I smirk. "'course, me bein' me, I just kept makin' it worse."

Buffy taps the file with one fingertip. "So I guess now we have to find out where the info came from."

"No skin off my back if we don't," I answer easily. "I just wanna get outta this place."

"We need to figure out where their captives are at first," Kennedy says quietly.

I frown in response and then my expression clears. "I heard one of the other vamps say somethin' 'bout 'em keepin' the pets in another warehouse nearby."

"Okay," Ken answers. "I'll take a group and the MV and head out to find them. Why don't the two of you get out of here?"

"But—"

"Ah! Don't argue," Ken interrupts. "The two of you together put off more energy than the rest of our force combined. Frankly, you're driving us all insane with it."

B opens her mouth to object and then snaps it shut. She glances at me and I shrug. Don't look at me, B. I ain't gonna deny it.

She gives me a look that I'm sure is supposed to be irritated, but all it spells to me is "frustrated". I give her a little grin, darin' her to say anything. Come on, B. Y'know I'll just embarrass ya.

She curls her lip into a tiny sneer and rolls her eyes. "Okay, we'll go. I've got a blanket in the backseat that you can cover up with."

I lift my eyebrow. "Thanks, I appreciate it."

She turns to go and then freezes. She hesitantly turns back to face us with an odd look. She opens her mouth, snaps it shut, and then a blush crawls up her cheeks.

Amused, I drawl, "Somethin' wrong?"

She licks her lips and then she asks shakily, "Your place or mine?"

I just about fall outta my chair and Ken slides down the wall holdin' her belly, laughin'. I bite my bottom lip as I struggle to regain my composure. Fuck, she's adorable. When I finally look up, B's lookin' at me like she wants to kill me.

"Yours," I just barely manage to choke out.

Chapter Twenty-Six: Alcohol, Blood, and Sweat I

I run a hand through my hair absently as I look around the room I'm standin' in. It just screams "Buffy". Pastels and light oak furniture make up the décor of her apartment. I ain't really surprised. I'm actually kinda fond of it, truthfully.

A whimper catches my attention and I look down at the three month old crème colored Labrador puppy dancin' 'round my legs. She leaps up and paws at my thigh, then falls back onto all fours. I smile wryly and shake my head as I kneel down.

"Hey there, Lee," I murmur.

I run my hand over the soft fur and the pup eats it up. She's pressin' into my fingers like she just can't get enough of it. I lean back when she tries to leap up and lick my face, laughin' at her disappointed whine.

"Hey," B calls softly.

I jerk my head up, startled and embarrassed, to find B standin' right next to me. Our eyes lock for the first time since we got here and my pussy clenches in response. A softer version of the lust I'm used to seein' in others is reflected back at me.

I want her, but we need to talk first, damn it! I remind myself. With that in mind, I stand, intendin' to tell her that.

She reaches out towards me, offerin' me a wine glass. I accept it and look, startled to find that it's blood. I glance back up at her questioningly.

"I keep it here for when Spike or Angel drop by," She explains quietly.

Tryin' to pretend that doesn't bother me, I nod and take a sip, my eyes widenin' in response to the taste. She spiked my drink. I lick my lips and raise an eyebrow.

She holds up her wine glass, this one shades lighter than mine. "I didn't want to be drinking alone, so I added some of my wine to your drink."

"Okay," I say slowly.

Somethin' is goin' on here. If I didn't know better, I'd say she's tryin' to seduce me. My breathin' quickens at the thought.

B's eyes lower and she takes a sip from her glass. My eyes track the movement and I notice a slight tremor in her hand. My gaze darts back to hers and she lowers her glass.

"So, um," She clears her throat. "Do you want to talk?"

No. I clamp my jaw shut to keep the answer from slippin' out. Oh, fuck. I may just be fucked here—in more ways than one.

I drain my glass in two swallows and hand it to B. I shrug at her surprised expression.

"I was thirsty. But um, yeah, we probably should, y'know— talk." My voice breaks.

"Oh fuck it."

The words startle me and I watch, confused as B sets her glass down on the coffee table. She reaches out and takes mine from me, settin' it aside as well. She comes towards me and I back up. If she gets her hands on me, I'm done for.

"I—I thought we were gonna talk," I stammer.

B follows me 'til I'm up against the wall and grabs my tank top, jerkin' me to her. The throbbin' between my thighs intensifies as she presses her body into mine. Her hands flatten against my belly and she insinuates a knee between my thighs. I whimper.

I'm fucked. She's got my libido by the clit and I'm startin' not to give a fuck about anything else. I swallow hard and look down into her eyes.

She bites her bottom lip and looks up at me from beneath her lashes. I'm experiencin' déjà-vu for a sec. She releases her lip and leans further into me.

"I know there's a lot we need to deal with," She murmurs hoarsely. "But right now I need you so much, Faith."

Fuck, if that ain't the one thing I've always wanted to hear her say. I close my eyes for a brief sec and then let myself go for the second time in one day. I open my eyes to look into hers again. There was never a chance of me resistin' her anyway.

This thing that's between her and me? It's as inevitable as a stake findin' a home in a vamp's chest. It's unavoidable and it's been buildin' since day one. Maybe even before.

Her hands run up the front of my ruined tank top, slidin' over my tits to pause on my upper chest. My nipples tighten and I shudder as I clasp her hips, pullin' her closer. I lick my bottom lip and lower my mouth to hers. Our lips brush against each other, once, twice and a third time.

Her tongue darts out to tease my bottom lip and it becomes somethin' more. My tongue slips out to tangle with hers and one hand rises to tangle in soft blonde hair. I grab her thigh with the other and bring it up, lettin' it wrap 'round my hip. Her arms slide 'round my neck and she groans against my mouth.

The sound makes me ache for more. I stumble back and turn, pressin' her up against the wall. I grind my hips into hers and she mimics me. I break the kiss and arch back, starin' down at the sight of our clothed bodies writhin' together. Oh fuck, that's hot—makes me wanna see it sans clothin'.

B lunges forward and our mouths crash together. The tang of her blood fills my mouth, mixin' with mine and the taste of the wine and I groan as I kiss her harder. My hand leaves her hair, trailin' down her neck and over her shoulder to her t-shirt covered chest. My palm slips over her nipple and she gasps against my mouth.

She leans into my hand and sucks on my tongue, makin' me grind against her harder. She whimpers and I chuckle against her mouth as I slide my hand further south. My fingertips brush her lower belly and she pulls her mouth away, gaspin' for air.

"We—we should go to bed," She stammers.

"Go to bed?" I ask, archin' an eyebrow at her. "But, baby, I ain't got any plans to sleep anytime soon."

B giggles, buryin' her face in my neck. Her voice comes out muffled, "You know what I meant, F."

I smirk. "Aw, c'mon, B. It's aight to have sex someplace other than the bedroom, y'know."

She lifts her head and glares. "I know, but I don't want our first time to be against the living room wall."

"Well, that's good," I answer slowly, "Seein' as how our first time was actually on a pile of pillows in front of a big ass group of vamps."

She smacks my arm and untangles herself from me. She shoves me back and goes around me. I turn to see her walkin' away.

I furrow my eyebrows and only just stop from smackin' myself in the forehead. I don't even see that as our first time, so how could she? It was dry humpin'.

I call, "Hey, where ya goin', B? I didn't mean anything by it."

She pauses in the archway to the hall and looks back over her shoulder. She smirks.

"If you want to continue what we were just doing, F, you'll follow me."

She abruptly disappears down the hall and I blink, surprised. Then I roll my eyes and start off after her, pausin' to kick my boots off. I continue down the hall, jerkin' my tank top up over my head and off. I let it fall to the floor as I enter the bedroom at the end of the hall.

I look around in confusion and then the door slams shut. I turn and find Buffy standin' behind me. She takes in the fact that I've lost my tank top somewhere and then lifts her eyes back to mine, the heat of her gaze so intense it nearly scorches me. I watch, spellbound, as she grasps the hem of her T-shirt and whips it off.

She lets the shirt fall to the floor and her hands drift to the buttons on her jeans. I don't think I've even blinked durin' this entire time. I can see why. I'm perfectly happy to just keep starin' at her.

She pops the button on her jeans and lowers the zipper, givin' me a teasin' look. She bends at the waist, wigglin' her hips to slide her skintight jeans off. I catch a glimpse of a tiny pair of black panties and whimper. God, is it wrong to wish I was standin' behind her instead of here? My gaze falls on her black satin clad breasts and I lick my lips, decidin' I'll be fine right where I am.

She steps out of her jeans and drops 'em on the floor. She looks up at me and straightens slowly, lettin' me take her in. Jesus, she's beautiful.

Golden tan skin that I know feels like silk hides lithe muscles that are twitchin' from leftover adrenaline right now. Her body's a story of an active lifestyle and it makes her that much more appealin' to me 'cause I know she can take me as I am. She looks delicate, but I know what that body can do. The thought that I'll be able to get my hands on her makes my body heat up.

I lift my gaze back to hers, lettin' her see just what she's doin' to me. She saunters toward me and I'm positive the grin she's givin' me would probably frighten anyone else. Not too many are able to handle a Slayer on the prowl.

But they ain't me. I'll just give her a look of my own and things will be just fuckin' perfect in my world. She reaches me and it rapidly becomes obvious that my world can become so much better.

Her hands slide up my arms 'til they reach my neck and she tangles her fingers in the hair at my nape. I lift my hands and slide 'em over the soft skin of her hips, tuggin' her closer as she pulls my head down. Our bellies brush against each other as our mouths meet again and I moan at the skin-on-skin contact.

We stand there just kissin' for the longest time, but it ain't nearly enough. I run one hand up her back 'til I reach her bra clasp and pop it open with a twist of my wrist. I smooth my hands over her sides and up to her shoulders where I grasp the thin straps, slowly guidin' 'em down her arms.

I let her bra drift to the floor as I wrap an arm 'round her waist, closin' the short distance between us. Our breasts brush against each other and someone moans. I ain't sure, but I have a sneaky suspicion that it was me.

I glide my left hand over the skin of her stomach, the light fuzz on her belly ticklin' me. My fingertips bump the underside of her breast and I cup it, feelin' her hard nipple brush my palm. She gasps against my mouth and I break away to look down. The contrast of my pale olive-toned skin against her darker complexion makes me wanna see more.

Chapter Twenty-Seven: Alcohol, Blood, and Sweat II

(Buffy's POV)

Her lips capture mine again and I sigh into it. Her hand leaves my breast and I whimper against her mouth in response. She pulls away and gives me a determined look.

"Clothes have gotta go."

She steps back and I sit down on the bed. I slide up to the top and settle back against my pillows to watch. Faith smirks and reaches down to unbuckle her belt one-handed. I lick my lips and arch an eyebrow as I lean up on my elbows for a better view.

There's just something so sexy about watching her right now—bare-chested, bruises and cuts scattered over her skin. Strong hands work the latch on her belt, scraped knuckles catching my eyes. She pops the row of buttons on her jeans open and wiggles her brows at me as she bends to slip them off. My gaze is immediately drawn to the firm breasts swinging gently with the movement.

Instead of straightening, Faith climbs onto the mattress and crawls towards me with predatory grace. A moan catches in my throat when I realize she hadn't been wearing underwear, the glimpse of neatly trimmed dark curls making my mouth go dry. This woman is going to be the death of me. She reaches me and I come to the conclusion that at least I'll die happy.

(Faith's POV)

I crawl up the bed towards her, keepin' eye contact as I go. I don't stop 'til my face is hoverin' over hers and then I drape my body over hers. I sigh as the contours of her body mold to mine. She leans up to capture my lips and I meet her halfway, pressin' her back into the pillows as I lick at her bottom lip.

This close, the heat comin' off her is almost unbearable. I can feel the blood pumpin' through her veins, the sound of her poundin' heart fills my ears along with her elevated breathin'. The slight tremblin' of nervousness moves through her body to mine as one of her hands comes to rest on my ass and the other clasps the back of my head.

My lips leave hers, trailin' kisses over her jaw to her neck. I nuzzle my face into her skin, the scent of the battle fillin' my head and makin' my body shake with hunger. Beneath the smell of blood, sweat, lust, and ashes I can still detect the lavender body wash she uses and somethin' salty/sweet that's uniquely her.

I shift most of my weight onto one elbow, bringin' my free hand up to her breast. I tease the dusky pink nipple between my thumb and forefinger, pinchin' it just enough to draw a gasp from B. I nip at her neck playfully and her nails dig into my scalp as she guides my mouth closer to her artery. I trail my tongue over the skin teasingly and pull back, givin' her a naughty grin.

"Gonna have to work for it, Slayer."

She gives me a low growl and pulls my mouth to hers, kissin' me with bruisin' force. Her other hand leaves my ass, her nails trailin' a fiery path up my back. Then she moves her hand to cup my right tit and now I don't care about the blood tricklin' down my back. Her nails flick over my nipple and it's my turn to growl.

I swing a leg over hers to straddle her leg and slip a little further up so that my thigh's pressin' up between hers. I grind down into her, trails of wetness coatin' our skin as our pussies slide against each other's thigh. I break away from her mouth to toss my head back and let out a low, long groan to relieve the pressure startin' to build in my belly.

My sudden action forced her hand to let go of my hair and her fingers trail down my neck and over my chest, tracin' the healin' wound there. Her other hand leaves my breast and slips up over my shoulder, her fingers tanglin' in my hair again.

I look down between us, greeted by the sight of our bodies writhin' together. My earlier thoughts come back and I smirk. Sometimes wishes do come true. A slightly painful tug of my hair brings my attention back to B.

I give her a feral grin and duck my head, suckin' a nipple into my mouth. I work it over with my teeth and tongue, drawin' all sorts of interestin' noises from her. I let the tip of a fang scrape over it, threatenin' to pierce the flesh.

"Oh f—fuck," She rasps, her voice breakin'.

Oh, I like that. I release her nipple and blow a stream of hot air across it. She cries out and I switch to the other one. I wrap my lips 'round it and move my hand from her breast. My fingers trail over her belly, startin' a purposeful path down between us.

Her reaction is immediate. She leaves the wound on my chest alone and gets a handful of hair in both of her hands, pullin' my head away from her breast. My lips release her nipple with a wet pop and I willingly follow where she's leadin'. Her tongue invades my mouth and I suck on it harshly.

My fingers brush her damp pubes and slip between her lips, slidin' over and around her swollen clit. A renewed flood of wetness drenches my hand and I take a deep breath, strugglin' not to rush. Then two things happen at once. My fingers find her cunt and I hear the sweetest thing I've ever heard.

"Faith, please," She begs, her lips tremblin' against mine. "I need you."

My name in that hoarse, desperate tone drives me wild. Still tryin' to keep things slow, I glide two fingers inside her. Wet heat surrounds me and her walls grasp at my fingers, tryin' to pull me in further as she cries out. My hand starts up a slow, easy rhythm, and I use the pressure of my own hips to keep her from increasin' the contact.

She pulls her mouth away from mine to groan, "Harder, baby."

I shake my head and give her an enticin' grin. "C'mon, baby. It'll be so much fuckin' better if we keep it slow."

"Fuck slow," She snaps.

I arch an eyebrow at her and lean in to capture her lips again. I murmur against her mouth, "That's the point."

Usually, I'd be all for fuckin' hard and fast. But this is B, and I want more than that with her even though my libido's screamin' at me. I don't know how much longer I'll stay in control though, 'cause my body's been in overdrive since Dionne and his boys busted in. But here's me givin' it my damndest.

Frustrated, B growls and sucks my bottom lip into her mouth. Her teeth scrape over it, once, twice and then she bites. I gasp and my body jerks as it registers the pain as pleasure. Blood dribbles down my chin and fills my mouth from the mark she left.

I feel her body surge against me as she uses my distraction to flip us over. She looms above me, her expression as wild and untamed as I've ever seen it. I gaze up at her, my free hand movin' to clasp her waist as my fingers start to slip from inside her. She captures my wrist, holdin' my fingers in place.

"Let me show you how it's done, F," She snarls.

Her hips start up a relentless, drivin' rhythm as she rides my hand. All I can do is watch, captivated by this aspect of her personality. This is her inner Slayer comin' out full force. Her eyebrow lifts, eyes issuin' a challenge and my control breaks.

I sit up, bringin' myself face to face with B. I tense my forearm muscles and start meetin' her thrust for thrust. I lean in to capture her lips and she grabs a handful of my hair, stoppin' me from reachin' my goal. I groan in frustration and she chuckles.

She pulls my head back, exposin' my throat. She ducks her head, trailin' the tip of her tongue from the hollow at the base of my throat to the cleft in my chin. She lets her mouth hover over mine, catchin' my eyes from close up. She smirks.

"Think you got the hang of it, yet, F?"

"Why don't you be the judge of it, B?" I rasp.

I wrap my arm 'round her waist and tug her so that our chests are brushin' against each other. I slam my fingers up into her harder, usin' my entire arm to put force into it. Her hips meet my thrust and she chuckles again.

"I think you're g—getting the hang of it," She says, her voice breakin'.

She closes the distance between our mouths and teases my lips with her tongue. One of her hands slips from my hair and I lose track of it. All of my senses are focusin' on her tongue, her lips, and her pussy. But I don't lose track of it for long.

Her fingertips slip through my pubes, findin' my achin' clit with unerrin' precision. She pinches it between her index and middle fingers, twists, and a loud cry tears from my throat. I collapse back onto the bed, bringin' her with me. She lifts up onto one elbow, her legs straddlin' my thighs as we continue to drive each other closer to the edge.

Her fingers slide further past my clit, findin' my drippin' slit easily and she wastes no time. Three fingers drill inside me, stretchin' me wide open. My eyes slam shut and I spread my legs wider, tryin' to get her further inside as my hips hump against her hand. My own fingers falter inside her, but I pick the pace back up quickly.

Oh, fuck. This feels so Goddamn amazin'. My arm leaves her waist and I reach down to grab a handful of her ass. My nails dig into the soft flesh, breakin' the skin. She breaks our kiss, a hiss escapin' her lips.

Wetness coats my fingertips and the scent of fresh blood reaches my nose. I feel my face start to vamp out and I clench my jaw, tryin' to fight it. Our eyes lock and she gives me a teasin' grin. Oh, God, B. Don't fuckin' play with me right now.

Ignorin' the plea in my eyes, she tosses her head back to expose her neck, her sweat-dampened blonde hair fallin' in waves down her back. She leans forward to nuzzle my ear and a warm rush of air washes across it.

"Don't fight it," She chokes out.

I look down at the elegant neck bein' offered to me and my eyes zero in on my mark. I can see the blood racin' beneath the scarred tissue, beggin' for me to drink. I close my eyes and give in, lettin' my fangs sink into her. More of her wetness floods my hand and I let my uncertainties go.

I can still taste a hint of the wine she drank earlier. The lust burnin' in her blood makes it that much richer. Her hips gain a jerky, uncoordinated rhythm, and a faint spicy taste taints her blood, tellin' me that she's close. I return my arm 'round her waist, pullin' her close again as I grind my palm up into her clit.

The sweat and cum liberally coverin' our bodies makes us slide against each other slickly. Over the sound of her thunderin' heart, I can dimly hear soft grunts and low growls reminiscent of sounds from our earlier battle. I suck harder at her neck and she stiffens, a low, whinin' sound rendin' the air and remindin' me that this ain't that.

Her inner walls clamp down on my fingers painfully and she's comin', hard. She jerks and I barely have the sense of mind to retract my fangs 'fore she can hurt herself. Her hips snap against me and her head flies back. Over and over, she calls my name.

Her palm grinds against my clit and her fingers slam home deep within me, hittin' my sweet spot and sendin' me spiralin' as my eyes slam shut. Heat suffuses my body and I'm gaspin' for breath as I arch up, the memory of life flarin' through me bittersweet. A sound like thunder fills my ears, drownin' everything else out as I'm set adrift.

(Buffy's POV)

I hold onto Faith tightly, trying to regain my bearings. My heart is pounding so hard that I'm a little worried it might explode. I've never felt anything as intense as what just happened. I can't find the right words to even begin to describe it.

My ears are ringing and there's a lingering soreness in my throat. My breathing slows and sets into a more normal rhythm and I take a deep breath, smiling as the heavy mixture of blood, sweat, and arousal fills my senses. A soft sound catches my attention and I look up, suddenly aware of the tension in the body I'm sprawled on. I'm surprised and deeply concerned by what I see.

Faith has her game face on and tears are streaming down her face. Her fists are clutching the crème colored quilt so tightly that her knuckles have gone bone white. I scramble off her and move up the bed so that I'm face-to-face with her. Her eyes are wide open and looking at something I can't see.

My brows furrow and I hesitantly cup her cheek. She blinks and our gazes lock as her face reverts to human. Her haunted expression fades to an aching tenderness that makes my heart clench. She gives me a sad smile and lifts her head, catching my lips in the softest kiss I've ever felt. Her tongue slips past my lips and the taste of blood and tears floods my mouth.

She guides me onto my back and covers my body with hers. Her hands glide over my skin and I'm stunned to feel my body responding again so soon. Her fingers brush my nipples and I moan softly against her mouth. Then the softness disappears as her kiss becomes hard, her touch growing determined and relentless.

Her fingers tease my opening and she pauses, pulling back from me. The expression on her face tells me she's giving me one chance to back out. My eyes flutter shut and my hips surge against her, driving down on her fingers. My still sensitized body objects and I freeze, trying to give my body time to adjust.

She isn't having any of that. Her fingers plunge in and out of me, her forearm tensing and relaxing convulsively with the movement. It doesn't take long for my body to turn the pain into pleasure. Straddling my leg once again, she grinds her center against the tensed muscles of my thigh, the fresh coat of wetness making my insides quiver.

Wanting to help, I go to lift my hands to clasp her hips and find my wrists quickly trapped in a firm grip. She shakes her head and stretches out over me, bringing my arms up above my head. She looks down into my eyes and sneers.

"Keep 'em there."

Oh, God. A mini-orgasm makes my pussy contract painfully around her still moving fingers. Before the tremors fade, she searches out my g-spot and sends me back over the edge. I cry out and slam my eyes shut, deciding that as of right now she can do whatever the Hell she wants.

I feel her fingers slip from my pussy and I cry out, objecting to the loss. She gives me a predatory smile, arches her eyebrow in warning, and releases my wrists. She starts crawling backwards toward the foot of the bed, licking her lips slowly. I furrow my eyebrows in confusion and then my eyes widen as understanding dawns.

"Open wide, B," She murmurs.

I spread my legs and she settles down between them, gliding her hands up my calves. She grasps my thighs and lifts them over her shoulders, circling them with her arms and clasping my hips. She lets her gaze drop to the apex of my thighs and a low, rumbling growl escapes her as she lowers her head.

Her mouth nuzzles me and I cry out as her tongue laps at my heated flesh. She wraps her lips around my clit and I clench my hands, trying not to grab for her head as she sucks hard. Her tongue bats at my clit and I clamp my hands around the bars of the headboard. I tighten my grip and call her name, offering myself up for whatever her need drives her to take from me.

Chapter Twenty-Eight: Bleeding from the Heart

(Faith's POV)

I enter B's bathroom, my hands full with the tray of food I'm carryin'. I kick the door shut and look up to see her settled comfortably in the garden tub. White bubbles cover her to the rise of her breasts, keepin' me from seein' her beautiful body. I finish chewin' the strawberry in my mouth and swallow, shakin' my head.

"What?" She asks with a slight grin.

I set the tray on the wide edge of the bathtub and give her a shrug, unwrappin' my towel and lettin' it drop to the floor. She sucks in a breath and I grin. It's nice to know I'm not alone in not bein' able to get enough.

"Scoot up, babe."

She slips forward and I climb in. I settle down behind her and reach forward to grasp her hips, pullin' her back against my chest between my thighs. I lean back against the tub and wrap one arm 'round her waist, lettin' the other dangle over the side of the tub.

B turns and kisses me, her tongue slippin' past my lips. She caresses my teeth with her tongue and suddenly freezes, jerkin' back to look at me. I arch an eyebrow at the odd look she's givin' me.

"What?"

"Where are your fangs, Faith?"

Huh? I run my tongue over my teeth and blink. Oh, heh. Then I shake my head and burst into laughter.

When I calm down, I find her lookin' at me with an impatient expression. I rub the back of my neck and reach for one of the glasses on the tray. I can't believe she hadn't asked about this before now. I take a sip from the wine glass, sighin' in pleasure at the taste of the wine.

"I dunno if ya ever noticed, but most vamps don't keep their fangs extended all the time. They usually look almost normal unless they're fightin' or feedin'."

Her eyebrows furrow and then her expression clears as she nods. "Yeah, I just didn't really think about it. It's not like I actively compare your kiss to someone else's."

I smirk. "Good to know you're not thinkin' 'bout someone else when your tongue's in my mouth, B."

She smacks my arm and turns back around. "You're such a pig. Get to the point."

I prop my chin on her shoulder. "It takes a lot for a vamp to keep their human appearance unless they're relaxed. Unfortunately, I stay tense most of the time, so I just don't bother puttin' the extra effort into keepin' my fangs hidden."

Knew I'd find away to relax eventually. Never thought it would take nonstop sex to do it, though. I stifle a laugh and kiss the skin near my mouth.

"So you're pretty relaxed now, huh?"

"I should hope so," I drawl. "I mean, if four hours of fuckin' like bunnies didn't do it, then I'd be worried."

"Faith!" She squawks.

I set my glass on the tray and retrieve a strawberry, dippin' it in the glass bowl of chocolate sauce. I bring it to her lips and my eyes fall to watch as she turns her head to bite down on it. Her lips brush my fingertips as she pulls back and I hum in pleasure.

"Yes?" I ask in answer to her protest.

She rolls her eyes and finishes chewin', swallowin' as she reaches for the second wine glass on the tray. She takes a sip and turns her head to kiss my cheek. Her breath brushes my ear and I shiver, feelin' my nipples tighten.

B snorts and leans her head back against my shoulder. "Haven't you had enough yet?"

I nip at her earlobe and murmur, "Never."

B retrieves a strawberry and dips it in the sauce, turnin' to offer it to me. I gently clasp her wrist and guide her hand to my lips, takin' the strawberry into my mouth along with her fingers. I catch her gaze, feelin' my body start throbbin' again as her eyes darken.

I moan, lettin' my eyes flutter shut as I wrap my tongue around her fingers. I bite down on the fruit and draw her fingers from my mouth, placin' a gentle kiss on the tips 'fore I release her wrist. I settle back with a lazy smile, openin' my eyes to find her lookin' at her fingers. I chuckle at her flustered expression and she returns her attention to me, lettin' her hand slip back into the water.

Her fingers entwine with mine and she guides my hand to her thigh beneath the bubbles. I caress the silky skin and she returns her head to my shoulder. I nuzzle my face into her neck, ignorin' my body's instinctive response.

I hear her sigh and I place a soft kiss to her pulse. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," She answers. "I was just thinking about the reason why you stay so tense."

Do I explain it? She can probably guess it without me havin' to say anything. It's not too hard to understand. I let my eyes close.

"'Fore ya came and got me, I still struggled a lot with just lettin' myself continue to exist. I could feel the Slayer crawlin' beneath my skin, pissed at havin' to share space with a vamp."

"Yeah," She murmurs. "That's pretty much what I figured."

I smile sadly, lettin' my face rest in the crook of her neck. I don't know how to tell her that unless I get my soul back, it's gonna start happenin' all over again. I still ain't sure how I'm gonna get it back, either.

B eventually sensed somethin' was up, so we got out of the tub and came back to her room. I'm pretty sure she meant to talk, but she fell asleep instead. I can't really blame her. It's been a hell of a day, and we certainly gave each other a workout.

I'm just lyin' here with her in my arms, gazin' down at her. Her face is snuggled into my shoulder and one arm's wrapped 'round my waist, the other's up by my head. One of her legs is tucked between mine, her knee dangerously close to my pussy.

I'm tired but my mind won't give me any rest. My thoughts keep circlin' 'round what I need to do. I keep comin' back to one conclusion, and I really don't like it. I think I could even go so far as to say I fuckin' hate it.

I gotta go back to Louisiana. The Council has a lot of resources, but even Giles didn't understand much about what I've become. Lenore's the only one who's been able to tell me anything, and though she didn't know about the sitch with my soul, she's still my best bet. And as much as it breaks my undead heart, I can't take B with me.

I don't know that I'll even find a way to get my soul back from whatever part of Hell it's in. I don't wanna tell her only to find out there's nothin' I can do and end up breakin' her heart. That's exactly what'll happen too, when she realizes just why I need to get my soul back so badly.

I won't feel right bein' with her 'til I know for sure that I won't be a danger to her and everyone 'round us. I doubt she'd wanna be with me either if she knew I can still lose control like I did before, and I'll have to tell her. So, my fears aside, if I wanna be with B, I gotta get it back.

And on the totally fucked up and sappy side, I wanna be able to offer her my heart, body and soul. I got the body and heart locked up tight, pulse not withstandin' and beat up as they may be, but I ain't about to offer her half a soul. I want her to have it all, and I'll give her anything it's in my power to give.

What really, truly fuckin' sucks, is I know I gotta leave now. If I wait 'til she's awake? I won't have the strength to walk away. I kiss B's temple, close my eyes, and struggle not to cry.

I'm gonna lie here a little longer, at least 'til sundown. I just wanna hold her for a while and feel her warmth seepin' into me. I'll have to make it last, 'cause the coldness of death is just waitin' for me to leave this bed.

Leavin' her apartment was the hardest thing I've ever done. The second? Admittin' I loved her in the first place. It's fucked up that I spent so much time runnin' from her and now I wanna run right back to her.

I left her a note, but it ain't enough. I keep gettin' these images of her cryin' her eyes out over it. I came by HQ to change clothes and pick up my stuff and I got an idea as I was leavin'.

She's gonna cry no matter what, but she ain't gotta be alone when she does. It's why I'm here now. I pause in the open doorway of Red's office, just watchin' her for a sec. I know she's gonna pissed when I tell her, but somehow I think she'll understand.

Red doesn't wanna see B hurt anymore than I do, so she'll get that I need go get a hold of myself. Probably even be all proud and shit 'cause I'm bein' so fuckin' mature. 'Course, she's gonna shit a brick over the way I'm goin' about it, but I wouldn't expect any less from B's best friend.

Red lifts her eyes from her computer and catches sight of me, squeakin' in surprise as her eyes widen. I smirk and lean against the doorframe, crossin' my arms over my chest.

"Problems, Red?"

She shakes her head and holds a hand to her chest, sputterin', "You—you scared the Hell out of me, Faith! Don't do that!"

I shrug apologetically. "Sorry."

"Uh-huh," She answers skeptically. "You sure don't sound like you are."

"True."

She glances 'round me into the hallway and my smile fades. She catches my expression and concern floods her face.

"Where's Buff?"

I ain't even gonna ask why she automatically thought B would be here with me. Guess B must've told her 'bout this thing that's happenin' between us. I sigh.

"Hopefully she's still sleepin'."

"Oh. So, uh, why are you here then?" Her eyes widen and she hurries to add, "Not that I'm not glad to see you. I mean, I always like to see my friends."

I chuckle. "Nice to know I'm welcome. But, to answer your question, I need ya to do somethin' for me." I rub my bicep and frown. "Well actually, it's for B."

Her face brightens and she leans forward in her seat. "What can I do?"

I lift my hand to run my fingers through my hair and let my gaze drop. "I have to leave and B's gonna need ya."

Her eyebrows furrow and she gives me a confused look. "What? Why are you leaving, Faith? You know we all want you here, Buffy especially."

I grimace and squeeze my eyes shut, feelin' tears burnin' my eyes. "I know," I groan.

"Then why?"

I open my eyes and let her see exactly how much this is fuckin' me up inside. I see the startled expression cross her face and it doesn't make me feel any better. I gulp.

"I don't know how much B told ya about what's happened, but there are some things that she doesn't even know about." I clench my jaw and bite out, "I fucked up, badly."

"That doesn't mean you have to leave. Everyone makes mistakes," She protests.

"I drained two people, Red," I growl, frustrated.

"What?" She gasps, her eyes goin' wide.

I give her a sad smile. "Yeah, that's right, Red. Murder-queen came back, and now I gotta go do somethin' to put her back in her cage."

"Buffy doesn't know, does she?" She asks quietly.

"She knows about the first one," I answer in the same tone.

"Where will you be going?"

She actually seems worried for me and not scared. There was a time we wouldn't have had this conversation. It's weird to see the contrast between the girl she used to be and the woman she is. Guess ya gotta be complex to be friends with a Slayer, though.

"Louisiana." I answer softly.

"Are you going to see Lenore?"

I nod. "Yeah, I am. I think she's got a better chance of helpin' me figure out how to get my soul back. I got this feelin' it's gonna be a bitch."

"M—maybe I could do it," Red stammers. "You might not even have to leave."

I give her a sad smile. "Red, Giles didn't know shit about what's happenin' with me. I know you're powerful with the witch-fu and shit, but I don't think ya can do anything."

"B—but maybe I could."

I shrug. "I don't wanna do Angel's deal, y'know. I kinda like gettin' my happy on."

"Faith, are you sure you're not just trying to find an excuse to run away?"

My face vamps out and I snarl, "What the fuck kind of question is that?"

She stands up, leanin' over her desk. "It's a pretty valid one from where I'm at."

I sigh, forcin' my face back to normal. "No, Red. It ain't an excuse to run. You don't know how fuckin' bad I wanna just go back to B's and curl up around her."

I ignore her startled look and continue, "But I ain't gonna be able to relax 'til I know for sure that I ain't a threat to her. Been there, done that, ain't lookin' for a repeat."

"But, Faith—"

"Shut it, Red," I snap, losin' my cool. "I'm headin' out. Ya can sit here and fume or ya can go be there for B. She's gonna need someone to hold her and it can't be me."

I turn to leave, startled to find Dawn standin' outside the office. She's givin' me this look that makes me a little worried for my safety. I wonder how long she was standin' there. Suddenly she throws herself into my arms, buryin' her face in my neck.

I rub her back awkwardly, not used to doin' this comfort thing. She shoves me back and gives me a very familiar look. Summers women are a stubborn breed.

"You better come back," She growls. "Or I'm gonna come find you and stake your ass."

I lean forward and kiss her forehead. "I will, Dawn. I swear it."

Tears fill her eyes. "Good, 'cause you still have to meet Connor."

I pat her cheek and force myself to leave, retrievin' my bag from where I left it outside Red's office. I hadn't realized it would be almost as hard to leave Dawn as it is B. But I guess those Monks really didn't mess 'round. Chick's like a little sister to me.

Chapter Twenty-Nine: The Longest Night

(Buffy's POV)

I wake up and without even opening my eyes, I know Faith's gone. I can't sense her anywhere. I don't even try to lie to myself and say she's just out slaying. I know better.

An agony so intense it makes my head pound rolls through me and I curl into a ball on the bed. Tears fall from my eyes to drench the sheets and sobs tear from my still sore throat. The pain only serves to make the tears come faster as my mind provides me with images of just why it hurts in the first place.

Why am I even surprised? I should have known this would happen. Every time I think I'm about to get happily ever after, it slips right through my fingers. But I can't even bring myself to be angry with her.

Oh, God, it hurts so much. I feel like my heart's bleeding out from my eyes in tears. Dramatic, I know, but that's the way it feels. It's worse than sending Angel to Hell.

I hear Lee bark in the living room as the front door opens and I stiffen. Is it? I close my eyes as my senses tell me that it isn't Faith and a fresh wave of misery washes over me. I wrap my arms around my middle and try to stifle my sobs.

A sound draws my attention and I lift my head, forcing my eyes open to see Will in the doorway. The look of sympathy on her face is my undoing. I lose my struggle to contain my cries and she hurries to me. She sits down on the bed and pulls me into her arms, making soothing noises in the back of her throat as she rocks us side to side.

I bury my face in her neck, just letting the tears flow. Unlike in the past, her attempt at comforting me isn't very effective, but I appreciate it all the same. She's been my best friend for so long and I'm grateful she's here. I just wish it were Faith instead.

I don't know how long we sit here before my sobs finally abate. I pull back from Will, bringin' the sheet back up from where it had fallen to my waist at some point. I wrap it tightly around me as embarrassment sets in. I don't even want to know what she's probably thinking.

I definitely know just what it looks like. My hair's mussed and still a little damp from our bath. There are fresh bruises and bites on my neck. There are more than a few hickeys covering me, some in some pretty personal spots – some of which she just got a very good view of, i.e. the one right on the rise of my left breast and the one around my belly button.

The sheets are damp from sweat, cum, and maybe even a little saliva. A few of the pillows are scattered around the room and somehow the lamp was knocked off my nightstand. The bars on my headboard, which are made of iron, have been bent apart. The room screams "sex" and, taking a deep breath, I realize that it reeks of it too.

My gaze falls back on my redheaded friend and I become uncomfortably aware that she's realized it too. I let out a shuddering breath and wipe the last of my tears from my cheeks. Her eyes meet mine and I jerk my gaze away. I catch sight of a folded piece of paper on the nightstand and my eyebrows furrow.

I sigh and close my eyes as I ask, "She's gone isn't she?"

I just have this sadistic need to hear it. I've never been into emotional torture, but apparently things change. Part of me's still hoping stupidly that I'm wrong and she's just out slaying.

"Yeah," Will answers quietly.

Another tear squeezes past my eyelid and I force my eyes open. I reach across the bed and grab the notebook paper I'd seen. I open it and I don't know if I want to kill Faith or kiss her when I read it.

B, I'm sorry I hurt you again. But I swear it's not what I meant to do. And if you're not hurting, then you're pissed. Please, B, try to keep trusting your heart a little longer. I know I all ready asked that once but I just need a little more time. There's something I have to do before I can be with you. I don't want to start a relationship with you when I'm not whole.

I love you,
Faith

When she's not whole? What the Hell? That doesn't... I lift my eyes back to Will's.

"She's going for her soul isn't she?"

Will nods and I'm not sure if I'm going to cry or scream. What is it with my lovers? Angel lost his soul 'cause of me and Spike regained his for me. Now Faith is going to try to get hers back too.

But why didn't she just ask Will to do it? I open my mouth to speak, only to have Will interrupt.

"We don't really know enough about what's happened to her to know if we can help her. Lenore at least understands more about what she's going through than we do."

Well, that tells me at least where she's gone. I consider whether I should go after her, every ounce of my being screaming yes. Will clears her throat and I jerk my attention back to her.

"She said she wouldn't be able to relax until she knew she wasn't a threat to you. I think she needs to do this on her own, Buff. She seemed really rattled."

I look away, not understanding the brief flash of indecision that crosses Will's face. I want so badly to go after her. But I know Faith. If she's determined to do this on her own, following her isn't going to do anything to help our relationship.

God, I love her. But I'd like it if she'd show just a little less stubbornness. I sigh.

"I get that, Will. I just wish she hadn't left without telling me herself. I could've done without whole "get some, get gone" method."

Will winces and nods in agreement. "Yeah, I don't really care much for the way she went about it either. But you have to admit that she's acting a lot more mature than she has in the past, with wanting to straighten her problems out and everything."

It's something anyway. I rub my temples and mumble, "Yeah."

"So," Will starts slowly, grabbing my attention. "Now that we've gotten the "getting gone" part settled, want to explain the "getting some" part?"

Now it's my turn to wince. The smirk on her face is positively evil. I groan.

"Can I get dressed first?"

"Sure," Will answers as she stands. "But you're not getting out of telling me just when you started having lusty thoughts about Faith."

Oh, God. Just shoot me now. I can tell all ready that it's going to be a long night.

(Faith's POV)

I take back what I said when I arrived at the airport in Cali with B. This was the longest flight I've ever taken. I blink. Jesus, was that really less than two weeks ago?

That thought only serves to remind me of just how fuckin' tired I am. The last sound sleep I really had was the day before we left Georgia. Since then there's been so much goin' on that I couldn't sleep for long and it was really light when I did sleep 'cause I was on edge. It's taken a lot outta me and now the adrenaline's startin' to wear off, leavin' me exhausted.

I lean back against the backseat of the taxi and let my eyes drift to the window. I'm tryin' not to think too much. But, the best laid intentions, y'know? My mind keeps flashin' to that last image of B as I was leavin'.

I just stood by the bed for a few minutes after I got dressed, gazin' down at her. Her hair was coverin' part of her face, but what I could see looked so fuckin' peaceful and she had a soft smile playin' at the corners of her mouth. It was a mind-fuck realizin' it was 'cause of me. Not just 'cause we made love, but 'cause she was happy I was there.

It made it that much harder to leave. Fuck, I hope Lenore can help me. There's a girl waitin' for me and I don't wanna have to disappoint her. At least, I hope she's waitin' for me.

She may be contemplatin' murder right about now. Hopefully she'll gimme a chance to explain 'fore she stakes my ass. I couldn't really blame her if she wanted to kick my ass first, though. Leavin' a letter instead of talkin' to her was really kinda fucked up of me, but I ain't that strong.

The taxi comes to a stop in front of the familiar colonial house and I slip forty in the money slot. I get out 'fore the driver can give me my change and shut the door, slippin' my bag over my shoulder as I go. I hear the car drive off as I make my way up the short driveway.

I step up onto the porch, squarin' my shoulders as I reach out to ring the doorbell. 'Fore I can, the door swings open and I'm faced with Lenore. She's got grayish white hair in a bun and glasses — y'know, the typical grandma librarian chick. 'Cept this grandma has a fuck-load of power.

"Faith," She says, surprised.

"Hey," I mutter.

"Are you all right?" She asks softly and then backs up. "Sorry, do come in."

"I'm just tired as Hell. It's nothin' a few days of sleep wouldn't fix."

I follow her into the house and she shuts the door behind her. She takes my bag from me and sets it in a nearby chair. Grabbin' my arm, she leads me into the livin' room.

"Sit down. Would you like anything to drink?"

"Nah," I answer with a sigh and sit down on the couch, leanin' forward with my elbows on my knees.

"All right," She answers and sits down in the armchair. "Can I get you anything else?"

I run my hand through my hair. "Listen, Lenore, I know you're like really into the whole hostess thing, but there's somethin' I need your help with."

"What is it? You know I'll help you if I can."

I catch her gaze seriously. "I need ya to help me get my soul back. And it can't wait."

Her expression grave, Lenore nods. "You know I will if it can be done, but may I ask why now?"

I lower my eyes to the floor. "I found out that part of my soul is bound to the Slayer, so I still have it, but the other half's trapped in purgatory."

"I see," She answers softly. "Yes, it would make sense as to why you're still in control, I guess. That was a sort of sticking point for us before. But why is it so urgent that you retrieve it?"

"I lost control," I answer, bringin' my gaze back to hers. "And it's gonna keep happenin' 'til I get my soul back."

"May I ask how you found this out?"

I study her expression for a minute, tryin' to figure out what she's thinkin'. I can't get anything from it to decide if she's got any ideas. I sigh and then I tell her 'bout the dream. When I'm finished, she's givin' me a grim look.

"What?" I ask, worried.

"You said the cave had red sand and there were two tunnels?"

"Yeah," I answer with a shrug.

"Oh dear lord," She mutters and stands to leave the room.

"What's the problem?" I ask defensively as I follow.

It's never good when stuffy people say those three words. In fact, it usually leads to a whole fuckin' lot of pain. At least that's been my experience. I'm sure B would agree.

She ignores my question and leads me down the hall to her office. I stand in the doorway and watch her rifle through the books on one of her bookshelves. She grabs one and moves to her desk, gesturin' for me to come over.

I reluctantly join her and she sits down in her chair as she flips through the book. She stops, slidin' it closer to me and I look down at the page. My eyes widen and I lean on the desk to get a closer look. The colorless sketch is faded and rough, but there's no mistakin' the familiar scene.

A figure is chained to the wall, his back visible. Lines of what I guess are blood run down his back from gruesome lookin' wounds. A wicked lookin' demon is standin' behind him with what looks like a whip in his hand.

The demon towers over the person. There's some kind of spikes stickin' up from his head and there's somethin' weird comin' outta his back. I frown and study it for a sec, unable to tell what it is. I scan the short paragraph below the sketch and sigh.

The paragraph describes the cave from my dream perfectly. Fine red sand, the two tunnels, the rock walls, everything. But there's somethin' I'm confused about.

I look back up at Lenore. "That sounds like the place. Who's the fuckin' pinhead?"

"The demon is known as the Soul Harvester," She says quietly. "Purgatory is a level of Hell, but it also contains a few levels of its' own. He rules one such level."

I nod. "Aight, so what does that mean? I gotta kill him or somethin'?"

She licks her lips nervously. "I don't think it will come to that. But, you may be required to pay a price."

I really, really don't like the fuckin' sound of that. I mean, nothin' good ever comes outta dealin' with demons. I'll do what I gotta, though. I clench my jaw.

"What kind of price?"

"I'm not sure. There isn't much written record about it. There are, however, accounts of the Soul Harvester being a rather sadistic individual."

I feel a jolt of uneasiness risin' in my belly and makin' my chest tighten, but I shove past it. This ain't the time for that. I'll worry about what might happen later.

"How do I get there?"

"There's a spell we can use to send you to the location of your soul. After that, it shouldn't take long to find him."

"Let's do it."

She lays her hand on my arm. "Are you quite certain this is the path you wish to take? There are records of people never returning from his realm, Faith."

Am I sure? Not really, but I ain't got a choice. My heart won't let me do nothin' else.

"I'll return," I answer, puttin' steel in my tone. "There ain't a fuckin' thing that can stop me now."

Chapter Thirty: Harvester of Souls

I hit the stone floor belly first, the breath rushin' outta me. My head bounces off the ground and a ringin' fills my ears as flashes of light dance across my vision. A low pulse of pain radiates from my temple where it hit to the back of my skull.

My stomach roils, threatenin' to make me puke. I swallow hard and force myself up onto my knees, lettin' my head hang as the poundin' increases.

I'm suckin' in deep breaths, tryin' to keep from gettin' sick. A sudden rush of pain makes me tense, and my head goes back as a scream tears from my throat. Tears flood my eyes and I fall forward on my hands as I continue to cry out.

A fiery pain races through my veins as a painful pressure swells in my chest. A slow burn snakes its' way through my body, makin' me shake uncontrollably. I can feel the bulgin' tendons in the sides of my neck achin' from the tension.

I feel my face vamp out and then the pain stops as quickly as it began. I pant, feelin' my body still tremblin'. I let my eyes drift back open, tryin' to get myself under control.

I get to my knees warily, afraid it ain't over. A sick feelin' makes my stomach drop and I grimace. There's somethin' crawlin' under my skin, makin' me itch. I glance down, eyes widenin' at the sight of somethin' writhin' and twistin' beneath my flesh. What the fuck?

Oh, God, this is too fuckin' much. I should've listened to Lenore. I clench my fists, strugglin' not to claw at myself. My nails dig into my palms and the skin breaks, tricklin' blood between my fingers to drip onto the floor.

The feelin' finally starts to fade, only to be replaced with another as familiar as my own face. Rage—the dark, primal kind I usually only feel when I'm fightin' a vamp. I haven't felt this particular brand of it since before I was turned, though.

I leap to my feet, my chest risin' rapidly with each breath. I need somethin' to tear into. I peer through the darkness, realizin' I'm standin' in a tunnel. I'm facin' a dead-end, so I turn around. I see a dim, flickerin' light in the distance and take off runnin'.

My senses are screamin', tellin' me there's a demon nearby. The excitement starts to build, makin' my body vibrate. I put more speed into my steps, goin' towards the light.

My skin flushes with anticipation and there's a poundin' in my chest that makes my brow furrow in confusion. There's somethin' not right here. But I ain't sure what.

My thoughts are all mixed up, and gettin' worse as I go. The reason I'm here escapes me, and I don't really care anymore. All I know is that there's somethin' to kill at the end of this tunnel.

The exit comes into sight and part of me recoils, makin' me slide to a halt. A wall of fire blocks my path, the flames lickin' at the stone walls and turnin 'em black. I'm conflicted as one set of instincts screams for me to stop and the other tells me to keep goin'.

I hesitate and then feel the anger surge as part of me chafes at bein' afraid. With a snarl, I force myself to saunter through the flames. I pause, realizin' that the flames aren't even touchin' me. I curl my fingers through the fire, watchin' in wonder as it flickers and swirls over my hand without burnin' me.

I have just a sec to register the comfortin' warmth caressin' my skin before I'm brought to my knees by a feelin' of intense sorrow. It hits me like a bolt of lightnin', makin' me sob loudly. I lunge forward onto my hands, silky sand slippin' between my fingers as I clench my fists convulsively.

My memories rush forward to claim me, draggin' ragged cries from my throat. I'm drownin' in a sea of conflictin' emotions, unable to fight my way past it. Then it all fades again to leave me with nothin' but the anguish of regret and self-hatred.

Tears trail over the angles and ridges of my face, leavin' salty trails behind. I'm gaspin' for breath and I can't hear anything over the rush of blood in my ears. Suddenly I'm aware of just what's wrong and I blink in confusion. My hand lifts to my chest, feelin' the poundin' of my heart and my mouth drops open.

That explains the pain—ain't no way somethin' dead can suddenly come back to life without a whole lot of it. Why now? Or more importantly, how in fuckin' Hell did this happen?

A sound snaps me out of my stunned contemplation and I lift my head. The sight before me makes my heart slam against my ribcage. Y'know, that ain't a feelin' I've missed all that much, I muse as I scramble to my feet.

An invisible force knocks me back onto all fours and pins me there. I struggle against it, screamin' out as it presses in around me painfully. Despite my screamin' instincts, I force myself to stop fightin' and the pain fades. The reason for my horror smiles as he strolls towards me.

Seven feet tall, at least, bare-assed naked, and skin a mottle of grays stretched taunt over bulgin' muscle, this demon's a page right outta my nightmares. Metal spikes stick outta his skull like some kinda wicked fucked hairdo and his skin is pulled back on his face, givin' a way too close look at his bone structure. He makes the Beast look tame.

"Stay still, sinner," He snarls in a loud roar that echoes off the cave wall. "What brings you to my realm?"

I lick my lips nervously. "I'm here to get my soul back."

He laughs harshly, the sound makin' my ears hurt. "Now what would a dirty, little mixed-blooded bitch like you want with a soul?"

Huh? What the fuck does that mean?

"What the fuck did you just call me?"

He kneels down on the ground in front of me and grabs a handful of my hair, pullin' my head back. I swallow painfully and he smirks.

"Human, but not; demon, but not; dead, but not—it's what you are. Now tell me why I should give it back to you."

I clench my teeth. "I need my soul so that I can regain control over my instincts."

He shoves me to the ground and releases my hair. He stands up and turns, puttin' his back to me. I grimace as I see just what it is I was seein' on his back in that sketch. Rows of razors have been imbedded in his skin, the sharp edges juttin' out.

A low glow emanates from his body and then he turns around, a gruesome smile on his face. His sharp teeth glint in the torchlight, stained red.

"You want it back?"

"Yes," I snarl. "I certainly ain't here for the fuckin' company."

"What will you do for it?"

"Whatever it takes," I answer without thought.

The pressure around me suddenly evaporates and I'm able to move again. I scramble to my feet, givin' him a wary look.

"Then you'll have your chance," He laughs, the sound sendin' chills up my spine.

The cave grows unbearably hot and white hot flames envelop me, makin' me scream in agony. My skin blisters and peels as the fire licks at me. Then the room swirls and I find myself in another cave. My eyes barely have time to adjust before I'm brought to my knees again by a dark sensation.

Lust and overpowerin' hunger gnaw at my insides. A low sound fills me, rhythmic and drivin'. My head falls back and I growl with animalistic intent. I get to my feet in a fluid motion as my instincts guide me.

I pass through the shadows, dim light crossin' my features at odd intervals. I go 'round a bend in the cave wall and find the source of the sound. Wooden drums beat powerfully, a man in tribal clothin' playin' 'em like a pro in the torchlight.

There's an altar stretchin' up outta the sand just in front of him. My eyes lift and I find what my instincts are cravin'. A small blonde is lyin' unconscious on the flat stone, her body bared and decorated in odd symbols. Her head is turned away from me, exposin' her neck to my hungry gaze.

I reflexively take a step forward. I realize what I'm doin' and look around, panicked.

"Fuck," I hiss, seein' no way out other than the way I came.

Lenore warned me that bein' here might bring out the other aspects of who and what I am. I just didn't get what she meant by it. But now I can feel the vampire in me screamin' for blood and it's so fuckin' hard to resist. I'm startin' to lose my grip over it.

With a snarl, I scramble backwards 'til I hit the wall and my fingers claw uselessly at the smooth stone. I jerk my head back, slammin' it into the wall and usin' the pain to keep myself focused. I slide down the wall, wrappin' my arms 'round my waist and keep slammin' my head back.

A sound seeps into my consciousness and I jerk my head up in the direction I came in here from. Somethin' slips outta the shadows and I growl in reaction. A big demon enters the firelight, his sleek dark skin glistenin'. My eyes trail down and I snarl.

What the fuck's with the demons in this realm? Don't they own any fuckin' clothes?

As he saunters towards the altar, his intent grows obvious. I force my eyes away from his dick in disgust and a second set of instincts rises. A howl of rage starts to build in my chest and I try to contain it, but it rips from my throat and echoes in the cave. The demon spins to look at me and I flip to my feet.

He freezes, surprise showin' on his oval-shaped face. His hesitation gives me just enough time to decide what to do.

I tilt my head, lettin' myself feel the darkness inside, lettin' the hunger rise up. Then I unleash it, lettin' it come out in an explosion of motion. I run at him, slammin' into him and pinnin' him to the wall with my full weight. I look him up and down, and then sneer in his face.

"I've seen chicks with bigger clits than that."

I bring my knee up into his erection, hard, and he roars in pain. I slam my fist into his gut. Then I slam his face into my knee 'fore I force him to straighten and then I slam his head back against the wall. I back off to give him time to recover.

I may not be able to keep control over my need to feed here. But I know how to satisfy my need for violence in another way. It's tried and true.

He charges at me, throwin' a volley of wild punches. I duck and weave, managin' to stay out of reach the entire time. Then I leap into a spin-kick, sendin' him stumblin' back. I reach out and grab his shoulder, jerkin' him into my fist and lettin' him go.

He shakes off his injury and snarls somethin' in a language I don't understand. I duck as he throws another punch at me, but I miss the follow-up, gettin' nailed in the ribs. I grunt and lunge for him, irritated.

I start throwin' punches, every one of 'em makin' contact. I'm movin' so quick that he can't even do more than try to block with a pained, bewildered look. A wild hit catches him in the chin, makin' him fly back and land in the red sand. He doesn't move.

Surprised, I warily move towards him. When I'm within a few feet of him, he moves. Caught off-guard, all I can do is roll with the punch that catches me in the gut. I slam into the wall and slide down, lookin' up dazedly to see him comin' for me.

I wait for him to reach me 'fore I move. He leans down to grab me and I arch up onto my shoulders, wrappin' my thighs 'round his neck. I catch his gaze briefly and with a twist of my legs, his neck snaps. I flip away from his corpse as it collapses to the ground and I land in the sand on my feet.

I glance over his corpse once and then bring my gaze back to the altar. All that fills me now is a sense of deep satisfaction. My chuckle is cut off as I'm enveloped in the painful flames once again.

Chapter Thirty-One: Purgatory

I awaken with a sharp intake of breath, confused and disoriented. I blink my eyes open and I'm confronted with a familiar sitch. I'm chained to a wall in the cave from my dream and a look down confirms that I'm naked again. I'm surprised to realize that my face has shifted back to human form.

I can still feel my heart beatin' in my chest and I take a small bit of comfort in it. Then the sound of clappin' makes me look up. My eyes fall on a familiar vampire and I groan.

"I'm fuckin' thrilled to see you too," She says sardonically.

I give her a look. "What the fuck do ya want now? I'm kinda in the middle of somethin'. I ain't got time for dreams."

She chuckles and closes the distance between us. She presses up against me, her hands grippin' my hips and one leg wedgin' between mine. I try to jerk away and she tightens her hold on me, pressin' her lips to my ear.

"This ain't a dream, baby. I'm very much here."

She nips at my earlobe and I jerk away from her. My fingers are itchin' for a stake and my body's screamin' for me to end her. Oh yeah, this is very much real. My instincts were the one thing missin' from that dream.

"Get your Goddamn hands off me," I snarl.

She chuckles and lifts one of her hands to grab my chin. Her thumb caresses my jaw and she leans closer. Her eyes lock with mine.

"Ya managed to control me, but can ya control her?"

Huh? Come again?

"Stop talkin' in fuckin' riddles," I growl.

She smirks, ignorin' what I just said. "Let's find out."

She tightens her hold on my chin and pulls me forward, capturin' my lips. I open my mouth to object and her tongue invades, bringin' the taste of blood with it. I tense and try to pull away, but I'm trapped between her and the wall.

Her free hand starts to roam and my mind screams out in horror. I clamp my teeth down, catchin' her bottom lip as she pulls back. I feel a sharp pain in my own and blood fills my mouth. I spit it out, grimacin' as she leers and my belly tightens with lust.

She smirks and licks the blood from my lip and then hers. "Ya ain't gettin' what's goin' on yet, are ya?"

"No," I growl. "Why don't ya just fuckin' tell me and save us the pain?"

She laughs and leans forward to lick the side of my face. "Oh, but I like the pain."

I wipe the side of my face on my shoulder, glarin' at her. She grabs a handful of my hair and forces my head to the side. Her thigh rams up against my pussy, forcin' me up onto my toes. I grunt in reaction and she laughs.

"Y'know," She raps. "That pain when ya first showed up? It was my reaction to that nasty little thing beatin' in ya chest."

"Maybe ya wanna shed some light on why it's beatin' in the first place?"

She shrugs and drawls indifferently, "My guess? It's just some fucked up side-effect of bein' here."

She releases my hip, bringin' her hand up to caress my neck. Her fingers hesitate over my pulse point and I grind my teeth. Her hand continues down over my chest, brushin' my nipples. I feel my body react and I squeeze my eyes shut, disgusted with myself.

"That creepy thing ya felt? Like somethin' was all up inside ya?" She continues. "Well, that was the Slayer fightin' against me."

She grasps my right nipple and pinches it hard, makin' me cry out. Pain and pleasure shoot though me, and I try to remind myself that it's her lust I'm feelin', and not mine. It doesn't do anything to stop me from hatin' myself for it though.

She lowers her head, envelopin' my nipple in her cool mouth and I gasp. I hear the rattle of metal and my eyes snap open just as the manacles fall from my wrists and ankles. My hand flies to her head and I grab a fistful of her hair, jerkin' her head away from me. I give her a nasty smirk and turn, slammin' her face first into the wall.

I feel the pain as the bridge of my own nose breaks and blood rushes down my face. I ignore it, instead focusin' on her. I pull her back and bring her around, punchin' her in the jaw and feelin' it in my own. I let go of her hair and jump up, spinnin' into a kick. My foot hits her jaw and just as I land, she reaches up, catchin' it.

We glare at each other and then she smirks, twistin' my leg and forcin' me to have to roll with it or else get it broken. I land on my back and she lunges for me, straddlin' my hips. She punches me in the jaw and then I buck my hips, throwin' her over my head. We both get back to our feet at the same time.

The next few minutes are a flurry of movement as we exchange blows, leavin' wounds on each other and ourselves. She gets me trapped against the corner of the cave and grabs a handful of hair, slammin' my head back against the wall. I grab for her hand and she catches my wrist with her other hand. She twists 'til the bone snaps and I cry out, my voice crackin' as she slams my head back against the cave wall again.

Suddenly she lets go of my head and grabs my shirt, turnin' and throwin' me down on the ground. She straddles my hips again and halls back to punch me in the face. Blows rain down on me, leavin' me dazed and bleedin'. Then they stop and I blink, peerin' up through swollen eyes.

A pair of yellow ones is lookin' back at me and I feel my stomach drop as her hunger fills me. She sneers and lunges for my throat, a restrainin' arm pressed across my chest. Her fangs tear through my skin and I cry out, grabbin' for her head. Intendin' to pull her off me, I wrap my fingers in her hair and then I freeze.

The image of the vamp and the Slayer from my dream hits me and I suddenly realize just what the vamp meant about control earlier. The vamp wanted to feed in that other cave, but I controlled myself. Right now, the Slayer wants to kill the vamp. I close my eyes and swallow hard, forcin' myself to release her hair.

This is all part of the trial to get my soul back. If I don't control myself and stop fightin' the vamp, I'll fail. I dig my nails into the palms hands and grind my teeth in frustrated disbelief. This sitch is beyond fucked up.

The taste of blood floods my mouth and I feel my clit throb from the lust she's feelin'. She growls against my skin and molds her body to mine, straddlin' my thigh. She grinds against me, sendin' sparks of heat through my pussy as my wetness coats my thighs.

I don't even notice when she removes her arm from my chest. It's when she forces my thighs apart that I become aware of her actions. She slips her fingers through my slit and I start to object, only to cry out instead when she slams three fingers up inside me. Then all I can do is clutch at the sand and gasp silently as she fucks me roughly.

The contradictin' feelings have my head spinnin'. There's the intense hunger, the need, and the darkness comin' from her. Then there's my own; pain, shame, need, embarrassment — and I'm angrier than I've ever been 'cause I know I can't stop her.

The sound of her feedin' makes me feel sick at my stomach and I choke back a bitter sob. She's everything I hate about myself. I squeeze my eyes shut tighter and try to hold back the tears buildin' in my eyes.

She slams her hand into me harder, makin' me ache inside. Then her palm finds my clit. Somethin' snaps inside and I reach up, grabbin' her hair and holdin' her closer to me. Snarlin', I grab her leather-clad hip with my injured hand, ignorin' the pain in my wrist as I guide her against the tensed surface of my bare thigh.

I don't know exactly what made me do it, but I understand why. No way in fuckin' Hell am I just gonna lay back and be a fuckin' victim. That ain't my thing.

She rakes the nails of her free hand down my thigh, leavin' a trail of blood and then we both get lost in the darkness. Pain and pleasure mix together, makin' us cry out time and again. The pressure in my belly increases 'til it feels like I'm comin' apart at the seams. Then my world is flipped on end.

My mouth falls open in a silent scream, pain flarin' white hot as I'm engulfed in flames. The weight of her body disappears along with the suction of her mouth at my neck. I go numb for a brief moment, and then I'm flooded with familiar yet strange pain and grief. I get lost in it, completely unaware of where and who I am for an endless time.

When I regain my senses, I'm huddled in a corner of Lenore's office. It takes a moment for everything to come rushin' back and then I'm drownin' in agony. Shakin' from the intensity, I wrap my arms around my knees and hold on.

Images flash through my head and I bring my hands to my face as sobs force their way past the lump in my sore throat. A familiar metallic smell fills my nose and my eyes snap open, horrified at the sight of blood coverin' my hands. I look down at the rest of me to find my body naked, riddled with wounds and stained with blood. I know where it came from but the sight of the blood on my skin still causes me to panic.

I leap up and run past a startled Lenore to the bathroom. When I get there, I turn on the shower as hot as I can get it and climb in. The heat doesn't even make me flinch as I scrub at my skin. The coldness seepin' into my insides makes me cry even harder.

Chapter Thirty-Two: Bleeding from the Soul

I didn't get outta the shower 'til long after the water ran cold and my skin felt like I'd scrubbed off a few layers. Then I got dressed and took off runnin'. I didn't stop 'til just as the sun was risin' and I had no other choice but to find somewhere to hide. I know Lenore's probably worried out of her mind but just the thought of bein' 'round anyone right now is more than I can handle.

I'm sittin' in a corner of an empty warehouse with nothin' but the rats and roaches for company. Fittin', I snort. It's almost a mirror image of the place I ended up in when I started goin' crazy with hunger after I was turned.

I curl further into the wall and wrap my arms tight around my middle, my fingers diggin' into my sides. My entire body aches, inside and out, not all of it physical. My chest is tight from my emotions and the tears are still flowin' down my face.

I don't gotta ask if it worked. It's like I can feel my soul burnin' inside me. The guilt and the regret of what I've done is eatin' me up inside. It's got me feelin' trapped, makin' my body shake.

I shift again and stifle a groan as the pain between my thighs intensifies. The vamp definitely did some damage and my body's gonna keep remindin' me for a couple of days. That's somethin' else that's got me rattled, even though I get why the bitch did it.  She was doin' her damndest to try to make me lose control and dust her ass.

That entire sitch was a mind-fuck and a half. I don't think I'll be able to get over what happened there for a while. Not just the rape, but the all too brief feelin' of bein' alive. It hurt so fuckin' much to feel the coldness surroundin' me again.

It was like dyin' all over again. The physical pain of my body dyin' again wasn't anything compared to the emotional. Lenore wasn't kiddin' when she said the Soul Harvester was a sadistic motherfucker.

I open my eyes and look out across the warehouse to where I can see a tiny bit of afternoon sunlight reachin' across the cement floor. I can feel a strange calmness in place of the edginess I've felt for four years but it ain't doin' much to console me. No, it just makes it worse 'cause now I can't help wonderin' if the price was too much to pay.

The memory of B's face as she drifted off to sleep in my arms flitters through my head and I laugh harshly. For all I know, this could've been pointless. I don't even know if she'll still want me when she finds out that I killed that cop. Much less if she finds out just how fuckin' weak I am.

I punch the wall, ignorin' the fresh pain as the skin splits, and shake my head roughly, tryin' to get rid of that thought. I need to stop that shit right fuckin' now. It wasn't my fault I couldn't fight the fuckin' vamp off.

I swallow hard and close my eyes. It wasn't, damn it. But it seems like no matter how much I tell myself that, there's still a lingerin' feelin' of shame that makes me sick.

I've always been a master at manipulatin' people usin' sex. I guess the vamp part of me ain't any different. She was just targetin' my weaknesses to try to make me lose control over the Slayer. Thing is, she didn't count on me usin' sex to distract my inner Slayer.

Yet another method that's tried and true. I smile, but it's weak. It fades quickly as my thoughts drift back to B.

The ache in my chest grows, drivin' me to get back to her. But I ain't ready yet. I don't feel strong enough to face her right now. I just need a little more time.

Don't get me wrong. I'm gonna go back to her. I gotta get myself together first, though. I don't want her to see me when I feel so fuckin' weak.

Thing is, the more I think about her, the more I feel the weakness startin' to fade. In place of it's a growin' desire to have her back in my arms. The thought of it's enough to make me forget the pain of the wounds scattered over my body.

I open my eyes again to glare across the warehouse, mentally urgin' daylight to fade. I gotta stop by Lenore's first to let her know that I'm aight, but I'm goin' home tonight. And I don't mean Georgia.

The thought that she'll tell me to go to Hell makes me falter, but I shrug it off. If she does, I'll just tell her "been there, done that". But I ain't gonna let it stop me.

I'll beg if I gotta, but I'm gonna get the girl. I'll do whatever she asks, 'cept leave her alone. I've been through Hell, literally, and it's my turn to get some motherfuckin' happiness.

"So are you quite certain you're all right, Faith?"

I give Lenore a weak half-grin. "I'm three by five, Lenore. It's just gonna take a while to get back to five by five."

She nods. "Well, do be sure to visit again. Preferably without such dire circumstances next time."

"Yeah," I mutter, "Could definitely do without the fucked up sitch."

"Yes, well. That isn't quite the way I would describe it, but it is apt," She says dryly. "I'm certain you would be happier without the four day stay in Hell, as well."

I look down at the shoes she loaned me since my boots are somewhere in Hell. I still don't get how four days passed. It seems like it couldn't have been more than a few hours, despite how long it felt at the time. I know Angel said time passes differently there, but fuck, that's weird.

I shrug uncomfortably. "Well, uh, I should probably get goin' if I wanna catch my flight in time. That cab ain't gonna wait for me forever."

"You will be sure to write, yes? I really would like to hear about everything that happened while you were in purgatory. You were a sight to behold when you returned."

I bet I was. If the sight of all that blood freaked me the fuck out, it probably just about gave her a fuckin' heart attack. Fuck, it would've given me one had my heart still been beatin'.

"Yeah, I'll send ya an e-mail when I get some things settled."

She gives me a slight smile. "I do wish you luck, Faith."

I roll my eyes. The news that I'm goin' back to Cali made her start actin' kinda weird. I'll have to ask her about that sometime.

"Thanks," I drawl as I turn to go.

"Wait, Faith."

I pause at the front door and turn to look at her, shiftin' the strap of my bag on my shoulder. "What's up?"

"Just out of curiosity, how is it that you are still able to get on an airplane without raising suspicion?"

I shrug. "I wasn't ever reported dead, Len."

I didn't stay down long enough for anyone to find me. Apparently it only takes a couple hours for a Slayer to turn, while it takes normal people a day or two. Freaky shit that I know Giles is gonna wanna hear all about sometime. He'll be harassin' me about what happened with Dane, Joaquin, and with the Soul Harvester the first chance he gets anyway.

"Ah," She says. "Well, do be careful."

I wave at her and turn to go out the door, chucklin'. I call back, "Same too you, Len. I'll catch ya later."

I close the door behind me and head down the driveway towards the cab. I snort when I realize it's the same driver from before. When the fuck does that ever happen? I get in, tossin' my bag on the seat beside me and slammin' the door shut.

"The airport," I tell him 'fore he can ask where to.

The car sets off for the airport as a feelin' of anxiety fills my gut. Soon enough I won't be able to change my mind about goin'. Not that I really wanna, but I'm still worried about her reaction. As determined as I am to not give up, it doesn't mean it ain't gonna hurt if she does reject me.

I get there and oddly enough, there's a heavy rain pourin' down. It doesn't happen often here, but when it does it's usually pretty hard. I stop under the overhang just outside the airport entrance and look around for a cab.

I only thought I was exhausted when I first arrived at Lenore's. I'm just runnin' on pure stubbornness at this point. The thing is? I ain't feelin' it at all right now with everything else that's happened.

The nervous energy runnin' through me at seein' B again is makin' me shake. It's fuckin' ridiculous that I'm so shook up, but I am. Then again, the next few hours could be some of the most important ones of my life. Maybe it ain't so ridiculous after all.

I swallow hard and blow out a harsh breath. Fuck, I need to burn some of this energy off. I clench my jaw and, abandonin' my search for a cab, I take off runnin' in the direction of HQ. It ain't like I can get sick.

My nerves are still raw from my ordeal, and I feel like I'm gonna break if I have to deal with much more, but I can only focus on one thing right now. I've waited so long to be able to tell B that I love her, and I ain't gonna let it go any fuckin' longer. I can't. I'll deal with the rest later.

Chapter Thirty-Three: Coming Home

(Buffy's POV)

It has been a very long four days. I don't know how many times I started to make Will call Lenore and ask about Faith. Not even tracking down the rest of Joaquin's army took my mind off of her. It actually made it worse, 'cause I missed having her at my side when I took the girls to clear them out.

I at least found out how they discovered Faith's identity. I tortured it out of a vampire before I dusted him. It seems Joaquin was interested in learning more about the Slayer line and one of his researchers recognized Faith when she visited the fourth floor.

We've been settling things and sending Slayers back to their posts since that threat's now gone. We usually only have about thirty Slayers around, most of them in training, on a daily basis, but we'd called more in as a precaution when we realized there was someone targeting us. Most Slayers stay at our headquarters when they're here 'cause it's cheaper that way, so it's certainly a lot less crowded now.

Even better, with the threat gone, us Scoobies can return to our own homes. Thank God. Most of the time when there's something big going on, we all end up staying here in our old rooms 'cause it's just easier that way. Things are starting to get back to normal, at least. Well, almost.

Will hasn't stopped teasing me since I told her about everything. She's kind of freaked out 'cause I told her a little too much, but she's dealing. I guess I can understand why she's disturbed that I let Faith feed from me. It messes with my head a little too, but only 'cause I enjoy it.

I don't understand why it's so different with Faith than it was with Angel or even Spike. With Angel, it hurt when he bit me. It might have been 'cause he was out of control during it and it wasn't exactly gentle. But with Spike, I never would've let him feed from me. Just the thought of it disgusted me and it pissed me off the one time he tried.

I know I was pissed that first time Faith bit me, but I don't know how much of that was from the circumstances or what followed. Some of it might have even been 'cause there wasn't any hiding the way I felt for her any longer. I felt a little betrayed at the time 'cause I felt like she was forcing me to do it, too.

Which she was, but it wasn't her fault. It would've been her or someone else. And I'd have been even more pissed if she'd have let some other vampire do that to me. I just blame the humping on us both, 'cause our hormones got severely out of control.

I've had a lot of time to think about things the last few days. I've resolved most of it, but there are a few things that are haunting me. The fact that she killed someone still bothers me more than I can describe. But I can't even imagine how much it must be weighing on her.

It helps me understand why she absolutely had to get her soul back, though. God, the pain it's going to cause her... I wish there was something I could do to help her. I want to know why she felt she couldn't tell me face-to-face. I would've understood, and I'd have even tried to help her if she had.

It just goes to show that there are still a lot of trust issues between us. It's not going to be easy to start a relationship with her. The words, "impossibly hard", come to mind, actually. But in the words of Faith, "If it ain't a bitch, it ain't worth doing."

I chuckle softly and shake my head, letting my eyes fall to the papers on my desk. I reach out to shuffle them, the one on top catching my attention. I sigh and pick it up, glancing over it.

Giles has been bothering me to fill out a situational report on this last mission, but I've been waiting for Faith to return. I want to talk to her before I do, 'cause I want to know what she's okay with me disclosing.  I smirk.

There was a time I wouldn't have even considered leaving anything out. Jesus, I miss the old days when word of mouth was good enough for a report. This is just another one of those things that have changed since we left Sunnydale, though. But there are other, much more, unpleasant changes.

One of those things is that it's almost impossible to go out Slaying without at least three other girls accompanying me. It's like they see me come out to Slay, and they think it's an invite for company. It wouldn't be so bad if they'd treat me like I'm just one of them, but they don't.

I can only deal with someone treating me like I'm a parent, teacher, or some kind of celebrity for so long before it makes me want to smack them around. But to be honest there are a few who don't do it. I don't see most of them too often, though, 'cause they're usually ones we've all ready trained and sent on their way with their own little watcher.

Unfortunately, that usually leaves us with a bunch of sixteen-to-twenty year old girls hanging around. Giles likes to keep them close until we know for sure that they'll be okay to "fly" on their own. He's just right at home as Head of Council. I definitely trust him far more than I ever would have Travers.

I toss the report back onto the stack of papers waiting for my attention and sigh again as my gaze flicks to the window. It's raining so hard out there that I can barely make out anything through the deluge. The thought that I wonder what Faith's doing drifts through my mind and I laugh softly. I'm hopeless.

I can't help it, though. Just the thought of her is enough to ram my thoughts right off track. The other day when I was chastising a younger Slayer for abandoning her duties to go clubbing, I thought of Faith and just froze mid-rant. My mind blanked, my hands trembled and my heart was racing. I wasn't any good to anyone for the rest of the day.

We'd be in serious trouble if the demon population knew that all it takes to bring a Slayer to her knees is her hormones. Pun unintended. I blush hotly at the images the thought invokes.

I look around my office again and growl in frustration as I get up. I have to get out of here for a while and find something to take my mind off Faith. Otherwise I'm likely to go insane. Hopefully I'll escape without anyone catching me.

I walk over to the coat rack by my door, pausing to run my hand over the leather jacket hanging there. Faith left it at my apartment and I haven't let it out of my sight since I found it on my couch. It might be juvenile but there's just something so comforting about being wrapped in something of hers.

I pull the jacket on and pause to lift the collar up to my nose, inhaling deeply. It smells of Obsession and Herbal Essence, and the faint odor of cigarette smoke clings to it. Beneath it I can make out a mix of primal, musky scents that are all her. It's a little different than she used to smell, and I know why, but oddly it isn't any less appealing.

I pull my hair from under the collar and leave my office. I turn down the hallway and start for the stairs. I'm halfway down them when I hear a voice call my name. My eyes slam shut and I inhale sharply as my mind lets out a long string of curses.

Son of a motherfucking bitching asshole! I snarl and turn on the step, ready to tell whichever Slayer it is just where she can stick her offer of company.

"Hey, Buff," Will says cautiously.

I blow out a breath and laugh tensely. "God, Will. I thought you were one of the other Slayers for a second there."

Her eyebrows furrow. "And that made you look like you were contemplating homicide?"

I smile sheepishly and venture, "Um, yes?"

She shakes her head. "Trust me, Buff, you don't want to go there."

I rub my temples. "At this point it seems like a better plan than the alternative."

"Ah," She chuckles. "Going out Slaying?"

"Yes," I groan. "I just need to get out and slay something before my thoughts drive me up the wall. And I don't want an audience."

No, I'd like to let loose without scaring anyone. They tend to freak when they see me going full out against something that's ten times bigger than me. I think it disturbs some of them to know just what a Slayer's really capable of.

Will closes the distance between us and grabs my elbow, tugging me with her down the stairs. "Come on, I'll protect you from the hero-worshippers."

I snort, letting her lead the way. "More likely protect them from me."

She shrugs. "Eh, I didn't want to rub your face in it."

"Yeah, I bet," I laugh.

We manage to reach the front door without anyone seeing us and I sigh in relief. I roll my eyes at the smirk Will's sporting.

"Stop it," I grumble.

"What?" She asks, trying to sound innocent. "I didn't say anything."

"You didn't have to," I answer dryly. "You were thinking it."

Her smirk turns sly. "I just think it's so cute the way you're all fidgety 'cause you're missing your big bad, leather wearing vampire mama."

I snort and close my eyes, slowly shaking my head as a blush creeps up my neck. When I reopen my eyes, I look at her seriously as I reach for the doorknob.

"Will?"

"Yes?" She answers cheerily.

"Do your self a favor," I start slowly.

She gives me a confused look. "What?

I start to open the door as I say dryly, "Don't ever say that to Faith."

"Don't ever say what to Faith?"

The familiar husky voice makes my heart slam against my ribcage and I gasp. The door is gently pushed open and my eyes widen at the sight of a dripping wet Faith leaning against the doorframe with her arms crossed over her chest. Our eyes meet and I'm breathless as I'm drowning in her gaze.

It takes me a bit to register that her eyes have regained their dark chocolate shade. It takes just a little longer to recognize the pained swirl of emotions there and my heart aches in sympathy. A splash of vivid color makes me glance down to find a multitude of bruises and cuts covering her face, including a split in her bottom lip. I reach out to gently cup her cheek and she catches my hand, clasping it to her upper chest.

"No worries, B. I've had worse," She mutters.

I tug her inside by our joined hands and swing the door shut. When I turn to take her in, my eyes widen. Her jeans and her T-shirt cling to her body, the white shirt making the purplish bruises along her arms stand out. Her right hand is wrapped in an ace bandage and her knuckles are scraped up worse than I've ever seen. I bring my eyes back up to hers and the strain and exhaustion obvious there bring tears to my eyes.

"Have you had any sleep?" I ask softly, taking in the dark circles under her eyes that aren't just bruises.

She gives me a shaky smile and shrugs as her eyes drift over my shoulder. "Hey, Red."

"Hi. You know, you probably could've gotten some sleep before coming," She teases and then returns her attention to me. "I'm going back up to my office. Behave and let the woman get some sleep."

"All right," I answer, ignoring her second comment.

"Later, Red," Faith calls softly.

I notice the added hoarseness in her tone and jerk my gaze back to her face. "Hey, are you okay?"

Faith waits until Will's headed up the stairs and then says quietly, "Depends on your definition of it, but I'll be fine."

I bite my lip and lower my gaze, uncertain. I want a hug, but I don't know how she'll react. I know she said she loves me in that letter, but her leaving the way she did left me a little out of sorts. She takes the decision out of my hands.

She steps forward and strong arms envelope me. The scent from her jacket is suddenly all around me as I bury my face in her neck. She tenses briefly and then tightens her hold on me. Her body feels almost frail and there's a faint trembling that makes me pull back, looking at her in concern.

My heart clenches again as I notice the tears glistening in her eyes. I grab her hand and tug her towards the stairs.

"Come on, baby. Let's go to your room."

She tightens her grip on my hand and pulls me back to her. She cups my cheek and her eyes search mine intently. She then leans forward and tentatively brushes her lips over mine, keeping it soft and slow as I gently return the pressure.

When she pulls back, she asks hesitantly, "Can we go to your apartment instead?"

"If that's what you want."

She nods and offers quietly, "We need to talk."

I give her a determined look and open the front door again, leading her back out into the rainy night. "You're going to get some sleep first."

Jesus, it feels so good to have her home again. But I just know it's going to hurt to hear what she's been through. The only thing I want right now is to hold her a while before the pain starts all over again.

Chapter Thirty-Four: Softly, Softly Now

(Faith's POV)

I hadn't known what to expect when I arrived at HQ. I was so fuckin' scared when I stepped up onto the porch. Luckily, the door was swingin' open 'fore I could do somethin' stupid. Then she was lookin' in my eyes and my fears didn't seem so important.

The emotions I saw lookin' back at me went a ways to patchin' up the wounds in my mind, heart, and soul. Seein' so much concern, relief, and yes, even love, in her eyes made me realize things are gonna be fine eventually. It'll be rough as fuck gettin' there, but if it ain't a bitch, it ain't worth doin'.

The ride to her apartment was quiet, both of us lost in our thoughts. I've been tryin' to figure out how I wanna tell her I love her, but I ain't found a way that don't make me sound like chump. I wanna say it in a way that she ain't heard before—in a way that tells her I'm gonna stick around.

She's in the kitchen right now, gettin' me some blood. My stomach started bitchin' in the elevator on the way up. I was gonna do it, but she said she wanted to do it for me. So I'm standin' here in her room where she sent me off to at a loss as to what to do with myself.

The bed's callin' for me, but I ain't got any PJs. I'd normally sleep naked, but since B wants me to get some sleep 'fore we talk, that ain't a good idea. If I strip, she's gonna see the marks on my body and she ain't gonna wanna wait for an explanation.

"Hey, thought you'd be lying down," She says as she reenters the room.

I run my hand through my hair and shrug sheepishy. "I ain't got anything to sleep in."

She arches an eyebrow and holds out the gently steamin' dark blue mug in her hand. "Since when are you shy?"

I accept the mug and bring it to my lips, takin' a huge gulp from it so I don't have to answer her yet. I pull my gaze away from hers, tryin' to find a reasonable excuse.

"Faith, what's wrong?" She asks tensely.

I sigh deeply and move to set the mug on the nightstand. Keepin' my back to her, I lick the last traces of the blood from my lips and roll my shoulders. I close my eyes and my shoulders slump.

"Some things were done to me, B," I answer coolly. "I ain't exactly lookin' too pretty right now."

I feel the heat as she gets closer and then her hands gently touch my back. I choke back a sob at the intense ache I feel in my chest from the tenderness in her touch.

"I don't care if you're a little beat up, Faith. I just want you to be comfortable," She answers quietly.

A tear slips down my cheek, quickly followed by another one. "B, I—I don't know i—if I can let ya see it."

It's too much. I thought I could handle it, but I can't. If she sees, she's gonna think I'm weak and she'll be disgusted.

One of her hands gently but firmly clasps my shoulder and she turns me around. Her eyes search mine, tryin' to find somethin'. She furrows her eyebrows and fear darkens her expression as she reaches up to wipe the tears from my face. Her hand cups my cheek and I lean into the contact, soakin' in the warmth.

"What happened?" Her voice cracks.

I swallow hard and then I open my mouth to speak, only to close it on a sob. My face scrunches up as tears flood my eyes to run down my cheeks. I break away from B and move around her, turnin' my back to her again. I stare hard at the dresser for a long moment, tremblin' from the emotions runnin' through me.

I clench my jaw tightly and reach for the hem of my t-shirt with both hands, wincin' at the pain as my right wrist protests the movement. I whip the shirt up over my head and drop it, leavin' my wife beater on for the moment. I kick my shoes off and drop my hand to the buttons of my pants, jerkin' 'em open in one movement. A sound draws my attention and I look up into the mirror on the dresser to see B's reflection.

My eyes trace her features, the ache in my chest intensifyin' at the distress evident on her face. I hate that I'm causin' her so much pain but I ain't gonna be able to get through this by bein' gentle. I lick my bottom lip, take a deep breath, and push my pants down slowly.

I hiss as the tight denim scrubs against the deep scratches and crescent shaped gouges runnin' the length of my thighs. A low, anguished sound reaches my ears and I close my eyes, forcin' myself to continue. I push the pants down around my ankles and step out of 'em, tryin' to pretend I don't hear B's choked cries.

Hesitantly, I grab the edge of my wife beater and tug it up. I let out a shudderin' breath as the cotton pulls at the scratches on my back and the bites on my breasts. Pullin' it off over my head, I let it fall on top of my other clothes. I clench my hands into fists and make myself face B, shakin' my hair away from my neck to expose the wound at my jugular.

Big, silent tears start rollin' down her cheeks and she covers her open mouth with her hand. I meet her gaze and I grind my teeth to keep from sobbin'. She ain't disgusted like I was afraid she'd be, but I don't think I can handle the pained sympathy in her expression. It's too fuckin' much like pity.

"Please, B," I mutter. "Don't keep lookin' at me like that."

Agitatedly, she wipes the tears away only to have 'em replaced with more. She bites her bottom lip and then releases it.

"How am I supposed to look at you, then, Faith?" She snaps, hurt.

I shrug and wipe at my own tears. "Any way but that one, 'cause I can't deal with it right now, B."

She approaches me hesitantly, her arms held slightly away from her sides. She stops in front of me and forces her gaze to meet mine.

"C—Can I, I mean, is it okay if I hug you?"

The pleadin' expression I give her is my answer and she reads it easily. She wraps her arms 'round my shoulders and pulls me against her, pressin' her body gently into mine. There ain't anything sexual about it but it's the best thing I've ever felt. I return the embrace, puttin' my arms 'round her waist.

Fuck, it's like I can't get close enough. Gently pushin' her backwards, I lead us to the bed. I guide her down onto the mattress, followin' her and settlin' us on our sides. She quickly snuggles up against me, wrappin' an arm around my waist. I hook my right calf 'round her thighs and encircle her with my arms, gettin' as close as I can.

I bury my face in her hair and take a deep breath, her scent and warmth helpin' to settle my composure. Her face is buried against my shoulder, her tears soakin' my skin. We're both tremblin' from the emotional turmoil and her breathin' is rough and heavy.

The exhaustion I've been fightin' off for days is startin' to nag me, makin' my eyes feel heavy. Strugglin' to stay awake, I blink rapidly and reach up to rub my eyes. I regret it as a jolt of pain lets me know that I've got a black eye.

B grabs my hand and pulls it away from my face. She twines our fingers together and brings our hands down to her hip.

"Hey, what are you trying to do there?" She asks teasingly, her voice rough from her tears.

I grimace and shake my head, "Just tryin' to keep from passin' out. I know ya have questions."

She sighs and releases my hand, bringin' hers up to cup my cheek. Her thumb traces my jaw, leavin' a trail of warmth behind. Her other hand gently massages my lower back, relaxin' me even further. She matches the small, involuntary smile that forms on my lips.

"Go to sleep," She says softly. "I'll still be here when you wake up."

"But—"

"No," She interrupts. "You won't be able to handle much more emotional stuff without getting some rest first, Faith. I doubt you've had much, if any, sleep at all since you left."

I wanna object more but my eyes are too heavy to keep open. I let 'em shut reluctantly as I start to drift off. I'll just rest for a while, that's all. We've got too fuckin' much to talk about for me to sleep yet. I ain't even got to tell her...

"I love you."

(Buffy's POV)

I'm just staring at her in disbelief as her chest slowly stops moving, signaling her sleep. She actually said it. I mean, I figured she did—or at least I had hoped—but I didn't think she'd say it yet. I smile sadly, but it quickly fades.

Grimacing, I move my hand from her cheek and brush her hair back off her neck. My eyes trail over the massive bruising and the bite mark as I wonder at what kind of Hell she's been through. I'm horrified by the sight of those marks on her beautiful, pale skin and my heart's breaking. What could leave those kinds of marks on a Slayer—especially her, of all people?

I squeeze my eyes shut against a flood of emotion, burying my face in her neck and taking a deep breath. I kiss the wound and tears slip from my eyes. She confirmed my fears of just how bad what she has to say is going to be. I just hope it isn't exactly what I'm thinking.

There's only one way those were made and the thought of someone doing that to her is making me crazy. My instincts are screaming for me to get up, to find something to rip into, but I can't. I told her I'd be here when she wakes up and damn it, I will be.

Chapter Thirty-Five: Baring My Soul

(Faith's POV)

I woke up with her in my arms and looked down at her, seein' her peaceful expression. I took a deep breath, her scent and heat fillin' me and it was too fuckin' much. I got up, dressed, and went to the livin' room, tears pourin' down my face again.

I've been pacin' the floor for God knows how fuckin' long. I'm feelin' kinda schizo again from all the different emotions bombardin' me. There's just so much anger, pain, sadness, and fear. But then there's happiness and love, too.

Most of it, I don't know how to deal with. The one thing I do understand is anger though. I get that as well, if not better, than any other emotion I've ever felt. I realize if I don't get all this crap settled soon, my feelings are only gonna get stronger.

A soft sound grabs my attention and I look up, findin' B standin' in the doorway. She looks so fuckin' adorable all sleep rumpled and confused. I force the thought out of my head and turn away, very aware that if I start thinkin' like that, I ain't gonna be able to say what I need to. Keepin' my voice low and devoid of any emotion, I tell her—everything.

When I finish talkin', I cross my arms over the chest and stay facin' away from her. I'm just waitin' to hear her to tell me to get out. Fear's the thing that's rulin' me right now and it's makin' me sick to my stomach. I wipe the fresh tears from my cheeks against my shoulder in irritation.

Tellin' her 'bout Dane was tough. Relivin' that so soon after what's just happened fuckin' sucked. But I gotta admit that tellin' her about purgatory was so much worse. I almost couldn't go on when I heard her start cryin' again.

Talkin' about killin' that pig had to have been the easiest part of it now that I think about it. That's ironic considerin' it's what I was the most afraid of less than a week ago. She didn't interrupt the entire time other than the sounds of her sobs and gasps.

That actually worries me a little. When B gets silent, there's somethin' wrong. But I'm too damn scared to turn around.

A warm body presses up against me and a pair of arms wraps 'round my waist, causin' me to suck in a ragged gasp. I close my eyes as the ache tightens my chest unbearably. I'm frozen in that spot for a long moment, and then I hear her voice.

"I'm so, so sorry you had to go through all that," She chokes out.

I bite my bottom lip, ignorin' it as the split in my lip reopens. She presses her face between my shoulder blades and her tears soak my shirt. I wince as the salt causes one of the wounds to sting.

It takes me a little bit to force the lump in my throat down so I can speak. "How can ya just ignore what I did? I killed that cop, B! I didn't just drain him, either."

I feel her lips press a soft kiss to my back and then she forces me to turn around in the circle of her arms. She looks into my eyes searchingly and reaches up to wipe my tears away. Her hand cups my cheek.

"I'm not ignoring it," She answers shakily. "But if I don't accept that it wasn't your fault, then how am I supposed to reconcile it with the fact that I'm in love with you? Because I am not about to lose you, Faith!"

I just look at her incredulously. As much as I'm fightin' not to listen to her words, my heart won't let me ignore it. A tiny smile plays at the corners of my lips.

She continues sadly, "And you're blaming yourself for what happened in purgatory, too. Aren't you?"

My smile disappears and I jerk my gaze away from hers, lettin' it fall on Lee's sleepin' form on the couch. I swallow hard.

"I've tried to tell myself it wasn't my fault, but I can't help the way I feel, B," I answer quietly.

Her hand moves from my cheek to twine in the hair at the back of my head and I hiss as her fingers brush against yet another wound. She jerks her hand back to my cheek and gives me an apologetic look. I shrug and she rolls her eyes.

"Faith," She sighs. "You didn't have any other choice."

"I know," I snap.

She gives me look. "Come on, let's sit down."

She grabs my hand, pullin' me over to the couch and then forcin' me to sit down. I ignore the protest from my body and settle back into the cushions. Lee scrambles to her feet and runs up to climb in my lap. She puts her paws on my chest and tries her damndest to get to my face, whinin' as I manage to evade her tongue.

"Come here, you little monster," B mutters as she reaches for the pup.

I let Lee go as B picks her up and then she settles her on the floor. I sigh and bring my eyes back up to B's, feelin' my throat constrict at the gentle look on her face. I watch as B starts to sit down beside me and then I reach out, grabbin' her hips and tuggin' her onto my lap. She stiffens and gives me a look.

"I don't want to hurt you."

I snort. "You barely weigh anything, B."

"But your wounds—"

"Are gonna irritate me no matter what," I interrupt.

She relaxes, slowly straddlin' my lap and wrappin' her arms 'round my neck. Her eyes search mine again and then she sighs.

"If you'd have fought her, you'd have lost in the end even if you did kill her."

"I feel like I lost anyway," I choke out.

"But you didn't. That Soul Harvester guy was forcing you to deal with the darkest parts of yourself. You managed to stay in control, even though every instinct was screaming at you." She gives me a half-grin. "Do you know how proud I am of you?"

Huh? My eyebrows furrow and I shake my head in disbelief.

"B, there ain't nothin' to be proud of," I snarl. "All I fuckin' did is kill one demon and lay back and let another one fuck me!"

She gives me an achingly tender look. "No, Faith. What you did was so much more than that. You fought against yourself and won."

I squeeze my eyes shut and lean my forehead against her shoulder. After a lifetime of believin' the absolute worst about myself, I'm afraid to listen to what she's tellin' me. If I do, then that means changin' the way I look at myself.

I feel a jolt of anger and I sneer. What the fuck is wrong with me? I'm sittin' here lettin' guilt eat me up for somethin' I had no fuckin' control over?

I snort and bring my head up, meetin' B's eyes. My brows furrow as a thought occurs to me and then a look of self-disgust crosses my face. I'm startin' to see what my problem is. It ain't got a damn thing to do with control, either. It ain't even guilt or shame.

There's some twisted part of me that's lookin' at this like I did it to myself. I get why, but it's pissin' me off like ya wouldn't believe. That vamp—she was me, just without the restraints of the Slayer and my soul. She really was everything I hate about myself.

She's the thing that drives me to drink from B when we fuck. She's the reason I can't walk in the sunlight anymore. She's why there's more blood on my hands. And Goddamn it, I ain't gonna hate myself for her darkness any fuckin' more.

(Buffy's POV)

Listening to what she's been through wasn't easy. I don't know what was harder, though—hearing the absolute self-hatred and agony in her voice or keeping my distance. I knew if I touched her, she wouldn't be able to finish talking about it.

She's blaming herself for what happened and it breaks my heart even more. I wish there was something I could do. But right now I'm more worried about what that look she has means. I've seen a lot of expressions on her face, some of them positively maniacal, but this... It has my body humming with tension as my instincts scream.

It's a look that says something is in for a whole lot of pain. I've seen it before, but at least this time it isn't directed at me. I almost feel sorry for whoever it is—almost, but not quite.

"Faith, are you okay?" I ask hesitantly.

Startled, she jerks and brings her gaze back to mine. Her expression softens and her mouth forms a slow, charming smile, leaving me confused. She nods.

"Oh yeah, B. I'm five by five," She rasps.

Then all I can do is squeal in a manner unbefitting a Slayer as I tighten my hold around her neck and clamp my thighs around her hips as she stands with me in her arms. I give her a disgruntled look.

"Faith!" I object.

"Yes?" She drawls.

"Put me down!"

She starts walking towards the bedroom, ignoring me. My protests die down when I realize just where she's taking me. Only good things can follow if that's where we're headed. But we weren't finished talking, were we?

"Don't we still need to talk?" I ask as she kicks the bedroom door shut behind her.

She gives me a wicked smirk and shakes her head. "Uh-uh, B. I'm done with talkin'."

She lowers me to the bed and crawls on top of me. She pauses, gazing into my eyes for a long moment. Then she lowers her head and presses her mouth to mine.

"I love you," She murmurs, her lips brushing over mine.

I'm breathless as she captures my lips in the softest, sweetest kiss I've ever experienced. Her hands start a slow, gentle exploration of my body and I lose complete interest in talking. In fact, it could be said that it's the farthest thing from my mind.

Chapter Thirty-Six:  Come on, Baby, Light My Fire

(Faith's POV)

I let my hands slide over her body, revelin' in the heat of life flowin' off her. Her heartbeat's music to my ears, her sighs and moans an accompaniment to it. The hazel eyes lookin' up at me with so much love and lust make me tremble.

I slowly peel her clothes off, pausin' to stroke the smooth skin revealed by each article removed. Every tiny scar my sensitive fingertips find, I lower my lips to caress. Every mark is a story of pain I wanna sooth away.

Her hands clutch at my back tentatively, like she's afraid she'll break me. I lift myself up and bring my mouth to her ear, kissin' the lobe softly.

"I ain't gonna break, B," I rasp.

Then I slip back down, returnin' my attention to the inch long scar on her thigh just above her knee. Her touch turns firm, fingers diggin' into my shoulders and I smile against her skin. I nip playfully at the soft flesh, makin' her jump slightly as she gasps.

Her nails gently dig into my skin, a warnin' that I ignore. My hands run up the sides of her taut thighs, feelin' the muscles tense and relax. I take a deep breath and the scent of her arousal fills me, bringin' a low groan from my chest.

I ache to bring my mouth to her pussy, knowin' the taste of her and cravin' more, but it ain't time for that yet. I wanna make it last instead of just givin' into my urges for once. Instead, I bring my mouth to her belly button and teasingly lick around it.

I slide my hands over the tremblin' skin of her flat belly, makin' it flex and lettin' my tongue trace the well-defined muscles. Her hands leave my shoulders and tangle in my hair. I nuzzle her belly and then move further up. Hoverin' over her tits, I catch B's eyes and give her a dimpled smile before I lower my head.

I circle her nipple with my lips and she hisses, her body surgin' against mine. Her nipple hardens immediately and I scrape my teeth over it gently. I cup her other breast and run my thumb around the areola, teasingly avoidin' the hard pink tip.

"Damn it, Faith! Don't tease me anymore," B whines.

She tugs my hair painfully and I chuckle against her breast as I finally relent, rubbin' my thumb over the hardened flesh. Flickin' the tip with my nail in time with my tongue lappin' at its' twin, I let myself get lost in her.

It ain't 'til she starts jerkin' at my shirt that I realize I'm still dressed. I reluctantly release her breasts, drawin' a cry of disappointment from her. I give her a quick kiss and then get to my knees between her thighs. I reach for the hem of my shirt and she sits up quickly, brushin' my hands away.

"Let me," She pants, givin' me a sexy little half-grin.

I lie back on the bed and spread my arms at my sides, raisin' my eyebrow at her. "Have at it."

She giggles and then it's my turn to be breathless. She returns my treatment, teasin' touches from her hands drawin' moans from me as she slowly removes my clothes. I bite my bottom lip and close my eyes, my fingers graspin' at the blankets.

When I'm completely naked, her touch suddenly disappears. Eyebrows furrowed, I open my eyes and find her crouched between my thighs gazin' down at me. Her eyes lift to mine and the heat there nearly scorches me. Then she lowers her mouth to my skin.

Startin' at my lower legs, she caresses my wounds with her lips, tongue, and hands usin' a firm touch that startles me a little. She leaves behind a trail of wetness and a lingerin' ache at each mark. Her eyes stay locked with mine the entire time.

A slow burn ignites in the pit of my gut, the familiar pressure in my belly risin'. Her hand slides between my thighs, her fingers slippin' through my curls. All I can do is close my eyes again and hold on as my body reacts.

"Open your eyes, Faith," She says softly, but firmly.

I force my eyes open and then she covers my body with hers, slidin' her fingers over my clit as she moves. I wince as my pussy contracts and clench my teeth to keep from makin' a sound. I don't want her to stop and she will if she thinks she's hurtin' me.

"I want you to see that this is me, Faith," She murmurs.

I'm suddenly aware of just what it is she's doin' and I love her more for it. I don't know whether to sob or moan. Her touch turns gentle and she slips two fingers slowly inside of me, givin' me time to adjust. Her gaze catches mine and I'm mesmerized by the emotions there as she starts to move her fingers in and out of me.

The slow, gentle rhythm she sets is drivin' me closer to the edge too quickly. There's somethin' 'bout the way she's lookin' at me that's makin' it that much more intense. My mouth is open, lettin' out a constant stream of soft moans and other noises. I can tell it's makin' her hot to hear it so I ain't gonna try to fight it.

I wrap my legs 'round her hips, lockin' my ankles together just behind her thighs. The new position makes her go deeper inside and I stiffen, eyes widenin' as my orgasm takes me by surprise. I just go with it and lose track of everything as my eyes slam shut.

(Buffy's POV)

Oh, wow. That has never happened before. I chuckle breathlessly and bury my face in Faith's neck. I guess her teasing had me so worked up that feeling her contract around my fingers set me off.

Her inner walls are still clutching convulsively at me and it causes another tremor to run through me, making me gasp. She chuckles huskily and I nip playfully at her throat.

"Which one of us is the vampire here?" She taunts.

I laugh weakly and shake my head. "You are, baby."

"I ain't the one bitin' people this time."

I lift my head and narrow my eyes. "And why is that?"

She snickers. "I was a little too busy gettin' my world rocked to think with my fangs."

I roll my eyes as an involuntary smile crosses my lips. "I don't know why I love you."

"Me either," She drawls. "But I'm happy as fuck that ya do."

I give her a kiss and she quickly cups the back of my head to keep me there. Her tongue explores my lips and then she pulls back. Lookin' in my eyes, she smiles.

"Thanks for what ya were doin', B," She says softly. "But ya ain't ever gotta worry 'bout me forgettin' that it's you touchin' me. There's no comparison between what she did and what you do to me with just one look."

I blush and look away. I had hoped she wouldn't bring it up, but I guess that was too much. With a shuddering breath, I run the backs of my fingers over her cheek.

"That wasn't exactly why I did that, Faith," I mutter.

"But you said—"

I shake my head, interrupting her, and she gives me a confused look. "Aight, then what was?"

"I—I kinda had this urge," I say in embarrassment.

Her mouth twitches into a smirk and she lifts both eyebrows. I can hear the laughter in her voice as she says, "An urge? Aight, now, B. You're gonna have to explain that one."

I close my eyes and mutter, "I just wanted to claim what's mine, okay?"

Startled laughter makes me cringe and I cover my face with my hands. The phone rings and I'm flooded with relief. I turn to get the handheld phone from the nightstand, freezing when I feel Faith move. She leaps over me, landing next to the bed.

She gives me an evil grin and grabs the phone from the base. Horrified, I scramble to get out of bed. She backs off from me, her finger hovering over the "talk" button.

"I don't know what you're thinking right now, Faith," I growl, "But do not do it!"

I wince as soon as the words leave my mouth and she throws her head back, laughing throatily. I'm suddenly aware that we're standing off against each other, completely naked. My gaze falls to her breasts, and I'm distracted long enough for her to answer the phone.

"Yo, this is Mistress B's den of iniquity, what can we do ya for?"

I jerk my head up, glaring at her. "Faith!"

Oh, God. I can't believe her! I snort. Wait, this is Faith. Of course she'd do this.

I move towards her and she takes off running out of the room as she continues talking to whoever's on the phone. Startled, I freeze for a second and stare after her.

"Oh, hey, Xan-man," She says.

Oh shit. I know why he's calling. I was supposed to take a group of Slayers to clear out a nest. I blow out an exasperated breath, following the sound of her voice.

"Yesterday," She says, pausing to listen to what he's saying.

"Oh, yeah, she ain't gonna be doin' that today," She says and then pauses again.

I find her in the kitchen, leaning against the fridge with a black mug in her hand. I cross my arms over my chest and lean against the doorway.

"I got plans for her and none of 'em involve leavin' here," She says.

My mouth falls open and I shut it with a click of my teeth, stomping over to her. She sets her mug on the counter and, as I reach her, grabs me around the waist. Startled, I offer no resistance as she pulls me to her. I suck in a breath as our bare skin touches.

"Good as is it to talk to ya, I got Buffy to do," She snickers.

I bury my face against her neck. My face is burning up now. Why me?

Suddenly, I hear Xander's voice raise from the phone, "Don't you mean things?"

"Said what I mean," She answers and then raises an eyebrow at something he says.

"Fuck off, Xan," She replies cheerfully as she turns the phone off.

She turns her attention to me and smirks. "Wanna see if I can light another fire for ya?"

Before I can answer, she drops to her knees in front me. She guides my legs apart, winks up at me, and leans forward. Her breath washes across my clit and then all I can do is clutch the counter behind me and moan as her lips touch me.

Epilogue: Life After

(Faith's POV)

Aight, so I've realized a few things. One of 'em is that me and B ain't ever really gonna be finished talkin'. Too much has happened in our past together for that to happen. There are a lot of things we don't know about each other, too. We still have things to discuss, but we both get that it can't be done all at once.

Just means that we've got a lot of things to look forward to and some things to dread. There are gonna be arguments, there's gonna be fuckin', and there's gonna be love makin'. Can't say I'm too disappointed in any of it, really.

I've had my soul back for three weeks. In that time, we've had two arguments, damn near broke the kitchen table doin' somethin' kinky she'd stake me for tellin', and we learned some things about each other too. Like I learned that ya don't wake B 'til she's had at least six hours of sleep, and she found out that I get horny when I watch certain horror flicks. But in between all that, there was plenty of love makin' to go 'round.

I've finally gotten my wish, though. I get to hold her as often as I wanna now, and it doesn't always involve sex. Though most of the time it does lead to it.

What? I can't help it. Her body touches mine and spontaneous combustion happens.

Right now though, I ain't feelin' major horniness; but don't get me wrong, it is there. I tighten my hold on her and shift, tryin' to get comfortable. She grumbles and smacks my arm. I relax on my side on the couch, rubbin' her back and pullin' her closer against my chest.

"Stop it," B whines, causin' Lee to whimper in her sleep from where she's lyin' at the foot of the couch.

I smirk. I'd be a little worried for my safety right now if I tried anything anyway. We were cleanin' up a big ass demon nest last night and didn't get back 'til early this mornin'. Then we had to work off the H&H's and it took a while.

We'd still be in bed if we hadn't all ready made plans earlier in the week to have lunch with Dawn and Connor. I tried to get B to cancel, but she wouldn't 'cause she doesn't wanna disappoint Dawn. I really don't wanna either, so I didn't put up much of a struggle. We're both supposed to be catchin' a short nap right now, but I'm a little wired.

We'll just have to sleep tonight on the flight out. We're goin' to Georgia to clear out my place and then we'll be comin' back. We waited to do that 'cause we wanted some time together first, and then we had to set up some time with Giles for us both to give him a report too. B was pissed when I wouldn't let her leave anything outta hers.

I made a point of remindin' her that Giles would be able to get past it easier than any of the others. I was right, too. The news that I'd gone to get my soul back helped reassure most of them. Wes is still lookin' at me funny, though.

It's gonna be tough as fuck helpin' him with Joaquin's captives when we get back. Ken and her group did eventually find 'em, but most of 'em were in pretty bad shape emotionally and physically. I got volunteered somehow to help 'em learn to cope with what happened. Unfortunately, so did Wes so I'll have to deal with him soon enough.

With B and Angel's help, I've started to deal with everything that happened. It ain't been easy, and it probably won't ever get that way. But it doesn't send me over the edge when I think about the darkness that's so much a part of me anymore. I've truly accepted that with bein' both a Slayer and a vamp, there's no gettin' around it.

I've had to accept a lot of things. There are still a few I gotta work on, but that's somethin' else I ain't gotta do all at once. Right now, though? I'm aight with knowin' that I need the violence and the blood. It helps to have a lover who doesn't mind gettin' bit sometimes and likes to go out on patrol with me so I can work out my frustrations.

I massage B's back and she snuggles closer to me, a moan slippin' past her lips. She nuzzles her cheek against my shoulder, turnin' her face up towards mine. My eyes trace her face and a memory flickers through my thoughts. I smirk.

"So, tell me, Slayer."

"What?" She mumbles.

"You still wanna stake me in my sleep?"

Her eyes flutter open and she glares up at me. "Keep waking me up and you'll find out tonight."

I snicker. I ain't ever wanted Cinderella's happily ever after, anyway.

The End